"I'd like to report some bad guys."
Tags:old west, wild west, western, westerns, film, films, mid-west, midwest, regional, cowboy, cowboys, rancher, ranchers, ranger, rangers, desert, deserts, middle of nowhere, middle of the desert, crime, report, reporting, victim, victims, calling 911, 911, calling 999, 999, pants, trousers, bad guy, bad guys, stolen, robbed, robbery, robberies, call, calls, crime against fashion, fashion crimes, fashion, fashion victim, fashion victims
"You've reached 911, and there's someone here who wants to say hello."
Tags:say hello, saying hello, pet, pets, pet lover, pet lovers, cat, cats, cat lover, cat lovers, 911, emergency, emergencies, emergency operator, emergency operators, cute, cuteness, overly cute, casual, out-of-place, police, call the police, calling the police, annoying, annoyance, annoyances, modern life, cat owner, cat owners, cat person, cat people, feline, felines, hold, holds, holding, on hold, emergency response, emergency responses, emergency response system, emergency response systems
"Yes. I heard a scream and a cry for help. And then there was some very ominous music."
Tags:ominous music, gunshot, gunshots, gun shot, gun shots, gun-shot, gun-shots, gun, guns, 999, 911, emergency number, emergency numbers, cop, cops, policemen, policeman, emergency response, emergency responses, rescue, drama, dramas, dramatic music, cop drama, cop dramas, police drama, police dramas
"Before we start, have you folks considered upgrading to Platinum Élite membership?"
Tags:fire, fires, fireman, firemen, firefighter, firefighters, member, membership, memberships, premium membership, premium memberships, premium member, premium members, upgrade, upgrades, upgrading, libertarian, libertarians, capitalist, capitalists, capitalism, emergency, emergencies, emergency worker, emergency workers, 911, pushy, pushiness, salesman, salesperson, salespeople
"Sorry to disturb you, Ma'am, but we've had some reports of a dog barking."
Tags:police, policeman, policemen, police officer, police officers, law enforcement, law enforcement officers, law enforcement officer, disturbance, disturbances, 999, 911, report, reported, investigate, investigation, detective, detectives, talking dog, bark, barking, woof, calling, called, prank calling, prank call, role reversal, smart dog, genius dog, pet, pets, pet owner, pet owners, dog, dog owner, dog owners, dogs, animal, animals
Tags:modern life, modern times, modern attitudes, phone, phones, modern technology, modern technologies, cellphone, cellphones, mobile phone, mobile phones, help, drown, drowning, lost at sea, emergency service, emergency services, coast guard, coast guards, convenient, convenience, calling for help, 999, 911, telephone, telephones
"My God, now what?"
Tags:emergency number, emergency numbers, emergency, emergencies, 911, 999, law enforcement, bat signal, cloud formation, cloud formations, police, cop, cops, crisis, crisis, disaster, disasters, natural disaster, natural disasters, paramedic, paramedics, super hero, superhero, superheroes, super heroes, super-hero, super-heroes
"I tried 911. They're only accepting the seventh caller."
Tags:phone, phones, telephone, telephones, call, calls, calling, phone call, phone calls, telephone call, telephone calls, 911, calling 911, 9-1-1, 999, calling 999, 9-9-9, caller, callers, accepting, seventh caller, 7th caller, radio, radio show, radio shows, entertainment, calling in, calling-in, call-in, call in, competition, competitions, contest, contests, operator, operators, calling the police, calling the cops, emergency, emergencies, emergency call, emergency calls
"I'm sorry, sir, but 311 cannot bring you hangover nachos."
Tags:hangover, hangovers, hung over, nacho, nachos, munchies, drunk, drunk food, drunk foods, drunken, drunken night, drunken nights, hangover cure, hangover cures, 911, emergency, emergencies, emergency number, emergency numbers, reject, rejection, rejections, request, requests, 311, non-emergency number, non-emergency numbers, non-emergency service, non-emergency services
"Did you make all these 911 calls?"