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"This baby will hold more than a hundred and twenty-five cubic feet of family rancor."
"We can conquer somebody with a bigger castle, or we can add on."
"For a small fee I can give you a shorter receipt."
"No, this is correct - you're both in 28-B. We no longer offer individual seats."
"When we implant your pacemaker, we can, for a modest additional fee, also implant your beeper."
"Sure, you're in, but it's not really heavenly until you upgrade to premium Heaven."