"Attention passengers. Flight 369 has been cancelled due to our desire to ruin your life."
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air travel, airport, airports, airline, airlines, airplane, airplanes, aeroplane, aeroplanes, traveler, travelers, travellers, travellers, passenger, passengers, flight, flights, flying, canceled, cancelled, desire, desires, wish, wishes, ruin your life, attention, announcement, announcements, problem, problems, departure gate, departure gates, cancellation, cancellations, customer service, service, bad service, bad customer service"Our maintenance crew is fixing a problem that should only take a few minutes but which will haunt you for the duration of the flight."
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air travel, airline, airlines, airplane, airplanes, aeroplane, aeroplanes, plane, planes, flying, flight, flights, traveler, travelers, traveling, travellers, travellers, travelling, passenger, passengers, announcement, announcements, bad sign, maintenance, maintenance crew, problem, problems, fixing, repairing, repair, repairs, safety, apprehension, foreboding, fear, fearful, anxiety, anxious, transportation"This is coach class. Let's lose the smile."
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flight, flights, bus, buses, train, trains, airline, airlines, class, airplane, airplanes, aeroplane, aeroplanes, economy class, coach class, economy-lass, coach-class, smile, smiling, travel, travels, transport, travelling, transports, repress, suppressing, steward, stewardess, frequent flyer, frequent flier, stewards, stewardesses, happy, happiness, over happy, smiles, tell off, tell-off"Finding myself between a roc and a hard place...,"
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literature, literary, word play, play on words, bookworm, book worm, bookworms, book worm, book, books, novel, novels, library, librarians, librarian, book lover, book lovers, literature, literary, lit, lit major, read, reading, avid reader, readers, reader, novel, novels, novelist, novelists, bookstore, book store, bookstores, book stores, travel, travelling, vacation, vacations, holiday, holidays, sinbad, voyage, voyages, modern, modern life, modern world, airplane, plane, planes, airline, flight, flights, flying"In case of a loss of cabin pressure, oxygen masks will drop down in front of you for two dollars."
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airline, airlines, airplane, airplanes, aeroplane, aeroplanes, flying, stewardess, stewardesses, host, hostess, air, oxygen, oxygen mask, oxygen masks, mask, masks, loss of cabin pressure, cabin, cabins, emergency, safety, safety precautions, safety precaution, take-off, speech, presentation, passenger, passengers, dollar, dollars, money, nickel-and-dime, nickel and dime, overcharge, overcharging, charge for everything, pay, cost, costs, costs of flying, cost of flying"As a courtesy for the inconvenience, please accept a voucher for three additional hours of your life, redeemable upon your death."
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air travel, airport, airports, airline, airlines, airplane, airplanes, aeroplane, aeroplanes, plane, planes, flying, flight, flights, traveler, travelers, traveling, travellers, travellers, travelling, passenger, passengers, delay, delays, delayed, late, inconvenience, voucher, vouchers, service, customer service, death, life, waiting, wait, long waits, redeem, redeemable, courtesy, wasting time, wasted time"Kindly place your seat in the upright position, extinguish all smoking material, fasten your seat belt, tie your tie, and adopt a serious and dignified demeanor."
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passenger, passengers, airline, airlines, aeroplane, aeroplanes, airplane, airplanes, plane, planes, flight, flights, rebel, rebels, rebelling, air hostess, air hostesses, air steward, air stewardess, air stewardess, cabin crew, cabin crews, difficult customer, difficult customers, tricky customer, tricky customers"But having less legroom puts you closer to your screen."
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plane, planes, airplane, airplanes, screen, screens, legroom, leg, legs, flight, flights, flying, fly, flies, hostess, air, air hostess, cramped, crowded, full, packed, space, no space, less space, economy, economical, economy class, film, in flight, in flight entertainment, in-flight, modern life, modern world, airline, vacation, vacations, holiday, holidays, travel, travels, travellingFurther Cutbacks
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budget cut, budget cuts, airline, airlines, airliner, airliners, flight, flights, frequent flyer, frequent flyers, stewardess, stewardesses, flight attendant, flight attendants, cabin crew, cabin crews, air travel, air travels, air travelling, airplane, airplanes, aeroplane, aeroplanes, cost-saving, cost-saving measure, cost-saving measures, meal, meals, in-flight meal, in-flight meals"I'm sorry, but the flight of the bumblebees has been cancelled."
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flight, flight of the bumblebee, piano, piano player, piano players, pianist, pianists, bumblebee, bumblebees, bee, bees, airline, airlines, flight delay, flight delays, cancellation, cancellations, canceled, cancelled, cancel, cancels, air travel, frequent flyer, frequent flyers, rimsky korsakov, korsakov, composition, compositions, entomologist, entomologists, entomology"How about air-quality canaries on every flight?"
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management, upper management, big boss, boss, bosses, manager, managers, exec, execs, executive, executives, board, boardroom, chief exec, chief executive, chief executives, board member, bogus, idea, ideas, airline, airlines, airplane, plane, planes, airplanes, aeroplanes, aeroplane, fly, flying, flight, flights, canary, coal mine, canary in the coal mine, air quality, pollution, pollute, pollutants, useless, uselessness, irony, ironic, dramatic ironyThe World's Easiest Airport
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airport, airports, maze, mazes, arrow, arrows, follow the arrows, following the arrows, ease of use, easy, easiness, simple, simplicity, simplify, simplifies, simplifying, redesign, redesigns, redesigning, arrival, arrivals, departure, departures, design, designs, designer, designers, travel, travels, traveler, travelers, traveller, travellers, airline, airlines, airplane, airplanes, frequent flyer, frequent flyers"Why is it that the person using the seat belt before me is always thinner than I am?"
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air travel, airline, airlines, airplane, airplanes, aeroplane, aeroplanes, plane, planes, flying, flight, flights, traveler, travelers, traveling, travellers, travellers, travelling, passenger, passengers, seat belt, seat belts, thin, skinny, body image, weight, overweight, fat, obese, obesity, self-confidence, self-esteem, health, fitness, body shape, out of shape, complaint, complaints, complainingChild on an airplane wearing a shirt with a switch that says "Airplane mode"
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air travel, airport, airports, airline, airlines, airplane, airplanes, aeroplane, aeroplanes, plane, planes, flying, flight, flights, traveler, travelers, travellers, travellers, passenger, passengers, kid, kids, child, children, airplane mode, flight mode, technology, turn on, turn off, setting, settings, phone, phones, cellphone, cellphones, cell phone, cell phones, cellular phone, cellular phones, mobile phone, mobile phones, smart phone, smart phones, smartphone, smartphones, flying with kids, flying with children, parent, parents, parenting, parenthood, family, families, shirt, shirts, t-shirt, t-shirts, modern life"May I ask you, sir, if our little jingle on TV had anything to do with your decision to take along the missus?"
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jingle, jingles, catchy, airline, airlines, airport, airports, influence, influences, influencing, consumer, consumers, consumption, vacation, vacations, holiday, holidays, holidaying, vacationing, ad, ads, advert, adverts, effective, effectiveness, customer survey, customer surveys, survey, surveys, surveying"Salted nuts or chewing gum?"
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greek, greece, ancient, history, historical, myth, myths, mythology, legend, legends, folklore, underworld, styx, river styx, hades, afterworld, hell, charon, kharon, ferrymen, ferryman, death, dead, life after death, ferry, ferries, boat, boats, ship, ships, cruise, cruises, journey, journeys, trip, trips, travelling, traveller, travellers, traveling, traveler, travelers, tourist, tourists, tourism, travel, voyage, voyages, air travel, sea travel, airline, airlines, salted nuts, nuts, mixed nuts, chewing gum, gum, bubblegum, snack, snacks, vendor, vendors, customer service, service, passenger, passengers, customer, customers, soul, souls"I spy with my little eye—something on fire."
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i spy, ispy, travel, travels, travelling, travelled, transport, transported, fly, flying, flight, air, airline, airplane, plane, aeroplane, my little eye, eye, fire, plane crash, kid, kids, child, children, parent, parents, parenting, parental, mom, mum, mother, mothers, precocious, dark humor, dark humour, black humor, black humour, tense, tensionA passenger on a plane watches as a truck labeled "Lostluggage.com" drives away from the plane he is on.
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air travel, airport, airports, airline, airlines, airplane, airplanes, aeroplane, aeroplanes, plane, planes, flying, flight, flights, luggage, baggage, bag, bags, lost, lost & found, lost and found, truck, trucks, lorry, lorries, problem, problems, customer service, service, modern life, traveler, travelers, travellers, travellers, passenger, passengers, traveling, travellingCowboys and cattle traveling on an airplane.
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old west, wild west, western, westerns, mid-west, midwest, regional, cowboy, cowboys, animal, animals, cow, cows, cattle, livestock, cattle drive, cattle drives, herding cattle, ranch, ranches, rancher, ranchers, ranger, rangers, farmer, farmers, herding, steer, steers, bull, bulls, air travel, airport, airports, airline, airlines, airplane, airplanes, aeroplane, aeroplanes, plane, planes, flying, flight, flights, traveler, travelers, traveling, travellers, travellers, travelling, passenger, passengers, cattle car, cattle cars, economyJones or Best Offer
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best offer, best offers, airport, airports, greet, greets, greeting, concierge, concierges, driver, drivers, driving, hired car, hired cars, car hire, car hires, mercenary, mercenaries, merc, mercs, airline, airlines, airline passenger, airline passengers, aeroplane, aeroplanes, hire, hired, hires, hiring, for hire, disloyal, disloyalty"Folks, today we're going to have perfect weather and some great views of states that are swinging to the Democrats."
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air travel, airline, airlines, airplane, airplanes, aeroplane, aeroplanes, plane, planes, flying, flight, flights, traveling, travelling, passenger, passengers, announcement, announcements, democrat, democrats, democratic party, swing state, swing states, election, elections, election campaign, election campaigns, voting, voter, voters, vote, votes, american politics, politics, government, governments, united states, us, u.s., united states of america, usa, u.s.a., america, american, view, views, political party, political partiesGrim Reaper rowing a boat full of dead souls to the afterlife; a tip jar sits on the side of the boat.
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greek, greece, ancient, history, historical, myth, myths, mythology, legend, legends, folklore, underworld, styx, river styx, hades, afterworld, hell, charon, kharon, ferrymen, ferryman, death, grim reaper, grim reapers, reaper, reapersdeath, dead, life after death, afterlife, ferry, ferries, boat, boats, ship, ships, cruise, cruises, trip, trips, travelling, traveller, travellers, traveling, traveler, travelers, tourist, tourists, tourism, travel, voyage, voyages, air travel, sea travel, airline, airlines, customer service, service, passenger, passengers, customer, customers, soul, souls, tip, tips, tipping, tipping jar, tipping jars, tip jar, tip jars, gratuity, gratuities, religion, religious