Appearances Cartoons

"Cosmetic dentistry changed my life."

"Mirror, mirror, on the wall, go to hell."

"A first-class stamp, please. Something casual."

"Like a duck. Calm and placid on the surface, but paddling like hell. That's me!"

"Just so you guys know, in the event of an emergency I'm fully trained in P.R."

"Play coy if you like, but no one can resist a perfectly symmetrical face."

"Everybody thinks I'm in rehab."

"Fix me something that reflects traditional values."

"Just a minute, Mister. You're not going out of here looking like that."

"My mother just told me I look like hell."

Jacket Required

"I'm not sure. Fat compared to what?"

"You realize, of course, that I'll have to make a big show of having security escort you out."

"Behold, as I guide our conversation to my narrow area of expertise."

"They're back! They're back! How do I look? Oh, never mind! Never mind!"

"But everything seems so neat and orderly we'd never guess that your lives are falling apart."

"The company blog says we're doing extremely well, though. Blogs will do that."

"We could be soulmates, if only you could overlook my tiny calves."

"I've found someone else who thinks I'm really attractive."

"I don't doubt that it's perfectly innocent, Margaret, but it does have the appearance of impropriety."

"Not only do you look marvelous but all of you looks the same age."

"So where's the good cop?"

"And please protect me from the appearance of wrongdoing."

"Must be a politician—not a hair out of place."

"He's one of our own, so let's give him a big welcome."