A knight wearing a full suit of armor with a doorknocker attached to his chest.
"You've got someone's shirt caught on your left horn."
Tags:viking, vikings, pillage, pillaging, raid, raiding, less talking more raiding, ancient, ancient history, historical, horned, horn, horns, horned helmet, helmet, helmets, caught, problem, problems, hat, hats, shirt, shirts, boat, longboat, norse, nordic, armor, armour, europe, european history, european, myth, myths, mythology, early modern, medieval
"By the time we got there, all we wanted to do was raid their kitchen."
Tags:knight, knights, soldier, soldiers, army, cavalry, horse, horses, armour, armor, commander, commander, captain, captains, spear, spears, weapon, weapons, stab, impale, medieval, history, raid, pillage, plunder, attack, kitchen, kitchens, food, eat, eating, steal, stole, stolen, hunger, hungry, starve, starving
"I could find the chink in your armor if I were given time."
"Didn't anybody tell you, Walter? You can't change the past."
Tags:knight, knights, knighthood, white knight, white knights, armour, armours, armor, armors, knighthoods, time travel, time traveller, time travellers, time-traveller, time-travellers, time traveling, time travelling, regret, regrets, changing the past, changing the past, husband, husbands, wife, wives, married life
"When I ask questions, I expect answers!"
Tags:history, historical, medieval, princess, princesses, prince, princes, royal, royalty, demanding, question, questions, questioning, answer, answers, nagging, angry, knight, knights, soldier, soldiers, armor, armour, suit of armor, suit of armour, weapon, weapons, spear, spears, lance, lances, damsel in distress, rescuing, saving, knight in shining armor, knight in shining armour, woman, women, fairytale, fairytales, fairy tale, fairy tales, children's story, children's stories, story, stories, literature, children's literature character, characters, fictional character, fictional characters, relationship, relationships, relationship issues, relationship problems, couple, couples, argument, arguments, arguing, fight, fights, fighting, conflict, conflicts
"The media says there's a war on Christmas, and St. Nick isn't in the business of losing wars."
Tags:christmas, xmas, yule, noel, santa, santa claus, father christmas, st. nick, st. nicholas, mrs. claus, animal, animals, reindeer, rudolph, war on christmas, politics, political correctness, secularisation, secularization, media, business, war, wars, fight, fights, fighting, holiday, holidays, weapon, weapons, gun, guns, firearm, firearms, gun violence, armour, armor, body armour, body armor, bullet-proof vest, bulletproof vest, bullet-proof vests, bulletproof vests, protective gear, protective equipment, safety gear, safety equipment, riot gear, shield, shields, helmet, helmets, armed, sword, swords, getting ready, preparing, preparing for war, preparing for battle, conspiracy theory, conspiracy theories
"I always get stuck in the wrong line."
Tags:airport, airports, flying, air travel, travel, tourism, passenger, passengers, traveller, travellers, traveler, travelers, travelling, traveling, screening, screenings, security screening, security screenings, security, protection, safety, scanner, scanners, metal detector, metal detectors, detector, detectors, officer, officers, agent, agents, tsa, t.s.a., transportation security administration, department of homeland security, tray, trays, stuck, trapped, line, lines, line up, line ups, lineup, lineups, queue, queues, waiting, impatient, impatience, wrong, long, knight, knights, armor, armour, removing, holding up the line, going through security, history, historical, medieval, fashion, fashion choices, bad fashion choices, bad choices, bad choice, bad decision, bad decisions, modern life
"Have you got that in bulletproof?"
Tags:fashion, vests, clothes, clothing, boutique, bulletproof, bullet proof, bulletproof vest, bulletproof vests, gun, guns, gun crime, mass shootings, mass shooting, crime, criminals, gun violence, violence, ballistic vest, ballistic vests, bullet-resistant vest, personal armor, armor, protection, mass shooting, mass shootings, body armor, utility, utility vest, utility vests, culture of fear, fear, fears
"There's been a change in plans. Instead of Abilene, we're going to Camelot."
"It's off the rack. The guy on the rack doesn't need it anymore."
Tags:medieval, history, historical, armour, armor, knight, knights, suit of armour, suit of armor, suit, suits, tailor, tailors, salesman, salesmen, fashion, menswear, men's fashions, clothing, clothes, men's clothes, men's clothing, used, second-hand, torture, rack, racks, off the rack, on the rack, wordplay, word play, play on words
"Have a safe trip!"
Tags:history, historical, medieval, castle, castles, princess, princesses, queen, queens, royal, royalty, damsel, damsels, king, kings, prince, princes, knight, knights, armour, armor, suit of armor, suit of armour, knight in shining armor, knight in shining armour, weapon, weapons, soldier, soldiers, marching, war, wars, battle, battles, fighting, army, armies, dangerous, danger, risk, risky, trip, trips, travel, travelling, traveling, seeing off, saying goodbye, goodbye, goodbyes, casual, farewell, farewells, safe, safety
Joan of Arc Is Revealed To Be A Woman
"A large Coke and an order of fries."
Tags:drive through, drive throughs, drive thru, drive thrus, order, orders, ordering, fast food, fast food chain, fast food chains, convenience, modern convenience, modern conveniences, medieval times, medieval life, knight, knights, general, generals, military general, military generals, horseback, service, service industry, service industries, suit of armor, suits of armor, armour, armor, suit of armour
"People don't give me bread crumbs. I take them."
Tags:swan, swans, duck, ducks, goose, geese, aggressive, bread, bread crumbs, park, lake, bread crumb, parks, lakes, threatening, stealing, mugging, attacking, feeding, unexpected, warrior, fight, fighting, fights, plunder, warriors, armor, armored, weapons, spikes, spike, armed, armour, armoured, master, masters, aggressor, aggressors, battle, battles, battling
"There's been talk of having you disbarred."
Tags:history, historical, military, knight, knights, soldier, soldiers, warrior, warriors, barbarian, barbarians, horse, horses, armor, armour, lawyer, lawyers, counselor, counselors, counsellors, counsellors, attorney, attorneys, solicitor, solicitors, barrister, barristers, legal counsel, disbarred, law, practicing law, practising law, fierce, fearsome, scary
"Mrs. Martin is here. She's the new substitute teacher."
Tags:education, school, schools, schooling, teaching, learning, teacher, teachers, student, students, teacher life, substitute, substitutes, substitute teacher, substitute teachers, principal, principals, elementary school, primary school, junior high school, middle school, high school, secondary school, military, armor, armour, helmet, helmets, bulletproof vest, bulletproof vests, prepared, ready for battle, prepared for battle, soldier, soldiers, safety, protection
"Arise." "I can't."
"How does it look untucked?"
Tags:history, historical, medieval, knight, knights, armour, armor, untucked, untucked shirt, untucked shirts, lady, ladies, princess, princess, fashion, clothes, clothing, fashion sense, men's fashion, menswear, men's clothing, men's clothes, shirt, shirts, suit, suits, suit of armor, suit of armour, chain mail, chainmail, opinion, opinions
Tags:robot, knight, knights, robots, mechanical, medieval, medieval knight, knighthood, monarch, christan church, defence, defend, battle, protect, protection, history, historian, historians, monarchy, dead, death, dying, killed, kill, broke, broken, break, decapitate, decapitated, castle, cathedral, sword, swords, armour, armor, suit of armor, suit of armour
Helmet Tan Line