"General, your night vision goggles keep hitting my forehead."
Tags:combat, tech, technological, military technology, military tech, cutting edge, night vision, stumble, stumbling, bumbling, bumble, clumsy, clumsily, clumsiness, fumble, fumbled, fumbling, intelligence, special intelligence, lights out, married, marriage, married life, spice things up, spice it up, dead bedroom, dead bedrooms, toy, toys, goggle, goggles, night vision goggles, general, generals, army, armies, cia, dates, date, general, generals
"You mean what we did just then was an actual war?"
Tags:general, generals, president, presidents, red button, red buttons, war, wars, warfare, military action, military strike, military strikes, missile strike, missile strikes, conflict, military conflict, armed forces, military conflicts, commander in chief, commander-in-chief, military strategy, army strategy, army, armies
"All I'm saying is, giving a little something to the arts might help our image."
Armchair Is Highly Decorated
Tags:furniture, furnishing, furnishings, decor, decoration, decorate, decorated, interior design, interior, interiors, pun, puns, punny, play on words, word-play, word play, military, award, awards, badge, badges, medal, medals, recognition, experience, experienced, old chair, arm chair, armchair, lapel, lapels, general, generals, army, armies, army general, army generals
"Don't you think it's time we talked about Operation Doug?"
Tags:operation, operations, military operation, military operations, general, generals, work, work-obsessed, workaholic, workaholics, therapist, therapists, therapy session, therapy sessions, military man, military men, army, navy, marines, focus, focuses, focusing, self-care, self-caring, aversion, averse, converse, converses, conversing, talk, talks, talking, talking cure, talking cures, psychologist, psychologists, psychology, shrink, shrinks, headshrinker, headshrinkers, psychiatrist, psychiatrists, psychiatry, psychoanalyst, psychoanalysts, psychoanalysis
"Preparing to Cross the Alps: Hannibal's Address to his Elephants
Tags:history, historical, ancient, rome, roman, romans, roman empire, carthage, carthaginian, hannibal, second punic war, crossing the alps, animal, animals, elephant, elephants, pachyderm, pachyderms, african, africans, problem, problems, speech, speeches, address, addresses, addressing, speaking, army, armies, war, wars, military, military strategy, military strategies, understand, understanding, encouragement, encouraging, inspiration, inspirational, inspiring, nothing to lose
"The yellow ones need to be signed, but the pink ones only require initials."
Tags:war, wars, military, death, dead, die, died, gunman, gun, guns, firing, firing line, historical, reference, references, referential, troop, troops, army, armies, private, martial, martial law, historically, referential, paper, papers, paperwork, sentence, sentences, receipt, receipts, document, documents, documentation, red tape, red-tape
"Anti-personnel land mines pose no threat to people, Colonel. Only to personnel."
Tags:land mine, land mines, anti-personnel, mine, mines, minefield, minefields, mine field, mine fields, military, military personnel, euphemisms, language, language trick, language tricks, kill, kills, killing, killings, murder, murders, murdering, military man, military men, general, generals, commander, commanders, army, armies, officer, officers
"By the time we got there, all we wanted to do was raid their kitchen."
Tags:knight, knights, soldier, soldiers, army, cavalry, horse, horses, armour, armor, commander, commander, captain, captains, spear, spears, weapon, weapons, stab, impale, medieval, history, raid, pillage, plunder, attack, kitchen, kitchens, food, eat, eating, steal, stole, stolen, hunger, hungry, starve, starving
"I'm beginning to feel really good about myself again."
Tags:psychiatry, psychiatrist, psychiatrists, psychology, psychologist, psychologists, therapist, therapy, therapists, shrink, shrinks, military, ptsd, post traumatic stress disorder, mental health, mental illness, depression, mood, mood swing, mood swings, general, generals, soldier, soldiers, army, patriotic, patriotism, persian gulf, gulf war, war, wars, troop, troops
"Don't you think after thirty years of marriage you could stop referring to me as 'the military'?"
Tags:military husband, military husbands, military general, military generals, husband, husbands, wife, wives, spouse, spouses, partner, partners, term of endearment, terms of endearment, married life, married lives, army, army man, army men, impersonal, dehumanising, dehumanizing, term, terms, terminology, euphemisms
Modern William Tell Uses An Air-Strike To Hit Apple
Tags:air strike, air strikes, drone strike, air force, drone, drones, air-strike, air-strikes, drone-strikes, militaries, military, army, armies, violent, violence, calling it in, call it in, general, generals, soldier, soldiers, officer, officers, modern warfare, war, warfare, modern war, modern life, technology, spin off, spin-off, spoof, spoofed, parody, parodies, parodied, william tell, folkstory, folkstories, folktale, folktales
Tags:war and peace, tolstoy, leo tolstoy, review, reviews, reviewer, reviewers, book review, book reviews, book reviewing, critic, critics, critique, critiques, conflict of interest, conflicts of interest, bias, biased, middle ground, middle grounds, warmonger, warmongers, hawk, hawks, military hawk, military hawks, compromise, compromises, compromising, general, generals, army, armies, navy, marine, marine corps, ambivalent, ambivalence, literary critic, literary critics
"No, you dismantle your nuclear arsenal first."
Tags:military, soldier, soldiers, arsenal, nuclear, nuclear weapon, nuclear weapons, flirt, flirts, telephone conversation, telephone sex, flirty, phone, phones, phone call, phone calls, teen, teens, teenager, war, wars, army, armies, navy, airforce, marines, flirtation, flirtations, air force, diplomacy, diplomat, diplomats, nuclear arsenal, nuclear arsenals
"This looked cooler in the commercials."
Tags:ad, ads, advertisement, advertisements, marketing, commercial, commercials, ad campaign, ad campaigns, advertisement campaign, advertisements campaigns, cool, cooler, not cool, war, wars, military, soldier, soldiers, army, armies, army soldier, army soldiers, army-soldier, army-soldiers, gun, guns, recruit, recruiter, recruiting, army recruiter, army recruiters, army recruit, army recruit, new recruit, new recruits, violent, violence, tv vs. reality, the reality of war, reality, television vs. reality, don't believe what you see on tv, man in uniform, men in uniform
"All the kids have noticed that Mom wears Russian Army boots."
Tags:spy, spies, spying, cold war, russia, russian, russians, espionage, boot, boots, fashion, fashionable, fashions, army, armies, secret agent, secret agents, ussr, u.s.s.r., embarrassed, children, child, kid, kids, mom, mum, mother, mothers, moms, mums, intelligence, intel, undercover, undercovers
"It's not fair - they have a much bigger payroll!"
Tags:king, kings, monarch, monarchs, medieval, defense, defence, castle, castles, fort, forts, attack, attacks, invade, invasion, invasions, invading, invaded, siege, sieges, besieged, fair, unfair, unjust, unbalanced, payroll, payrolls, corporate, corporation, business, businesses, games, games, salary, salaries, employee, employees, knight, knights, army, armies, soldier, soldiers, modern, history, contrast, comparison, comparing
"I just said, 'Open Sesame', and there they were."
Entertaining The Troops On Wall Street
Tags:wall street, stocks, stock, stock exchange, play on words, word play, entertaining, entertainer, entertain, entertainment, sing, singer, army, singing, show, shows, stage show, troops, sarcasm, sarcastic, stock broker, stock brokers, broker, brokers, stocks and shares, shares, capitalism, capitalist, commodity exchange, trading, trading floor, trader, traders, future exchange, critical, critique, business, big banks
"Hold on - I'll call in an air strike."
Tags:air strike, air strikes, drone strike, air force, drone, drones, air-strike, air-strikes, drone-strikes, militaries, military, army, armies, violent, violence, calling it in, call it in, general, generals, soldier, soldiers, officer, officers, modern warfare, war, warfare, modern war, modern life, technology, spin off, spin-off, spoof, spoofed, parody, parodies, parodied, tree, trees, stuck in a tree, ball, bark, barking, pet, pets, domestic pet, domestic pets, sarcasm, sarcastic, tree, trees, dog, dogs, anything for my dog
"In the end, he decided to go negative."
Tags:negative publicity, negative campaign, negative campaigns, negative, negativity, military campaign, military campaigns, political campaign, political campaigns, king, kings, invader, invaders, invasion, invasions, reputation, reputations, leadership style, leadership styles, attack ad, attack ads, army, military soldier, soldiers, battlefield, battlefields, tyrant, tyrants, tyranny, tyrannies, warlord, warlords
"My people will get back to your people."
Tags:king, kings, ruler, rulers, general, generals, officer, officers, ancient rome, ancient greece, barbarians, vikings, politics, history, historical, medieval, politician, politicians, government, governments, diplomacy, diplomats, diplomat, international relations, foreign relations, war, wars, conflict, conflicts, fight, fights, fighting, negotiating, negotiation, negotiations, army, armies, enemy, enemies, warrior, warriors, soldier, soldiers, expression, expressions, word play, wordplay
"If I don't make it out of here alive, please send my sweetheart this picture of my crotch."
Tags:selfie, selfies, text, texts, texting, photo, photos, photograph, photographs, photographing, photography, bunker, bunkers, trench warfare, soldier, soldiers, fighter, fighters, fighting, army, armies, military man, military men, letter home, letters home, letter, sweetheart, sweethearts, modern life, modern times, dirty picture, dirty pictures, rude picture, rude pictures, anthony weiner, scandal, scandals, political scandal, political scandals
"I'm returning home triumphant - do you need me to pick anything up?"
Tags:home, returning home, return, returns, returning, come back, comes back, coming back, errand, errands, cellphone, cellphones, cell phone, cell phones, mobile, mobiles, phone, phones, smartphone, smartphones, victor, victors, victorious, call your wife, calling your wife, chore, chores, menial task, menial tasks, army, armies, general, generals, military leader, military leaders, married life