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"Of course, art is one thing, dear - life is another."
"Today we're going to explore in paint how we feel when we're picked up late from preschool."
"And if you'd like your artwork displayed please include a brief bio."
"The art lady came in and told me all people want is derivative crap."
"Now, is this the kind of painting your Mommy would be proud to post on her Instagram?"
"He shows great artistic pretension."