"I thought it was legal-I wrote it on a legal pad."
Tags:legal pad, legal pads, break the law, breaks the law, breaking the law, excuse, excuses, bad excuse, bad excuses, legal paper, legal sized paper, white collar crime, white collar crimes, white collar criminal, white collar criminals, embezzlement, fraud, fraudulent, fraudulence, corporate fraud, broken laws, broken law
"He's running late this morning. He unexpectedly snapped out of denial."
Tags:denial, in denial, late for work, morning, mornings, monday, mondays, monday morning, monday mornings, midlife crisis, mid-life crisis, middle age, middle aged, getting old, getting older, ageing, crisis, existential crisis, running late, excuse, excuses, bad excuse, bad excuses, sick day, sick days, sick leave, sickie, sickies, the inevitability of death
"My only crime, Denise, was loving you too much. That and embezzling your trust fund."
Tags:embezzle, embezzles, embezzling, corporate crime, corporate criminal, corporate criminals, white collar crime, white collar crimes, trust fund, trust funds, trust, excuse, excuses, bad excuse, bad excuses, lame excuse, lame excuses, love, loves, take advantage, taking advantage, wife, wives, fraud, fraudulent
"Sure, I follow the herd- out of a deep respect for the concept of community."
Tags:sheep, follow the herd, following the herd, community, communities, philosophy, excuse, excuses, bad excuse, bad excuses, justification, justifications, thinking outside the box, obedience, brainless, braindead, thoughtless, thoughtlessness, modern life, modern attitudes, pretentious, pretension, pretentiousness, self important, self importance, self-important, self-importance, expression, expressions, idiom, idioms, following the pack, follow the pack
"I we meet in the woods and anything happens, remember it's just hunting."
"The parking is terrible, so we decided to never do anything again."
"You can't judge my parenting skills by what you see in the lobby."
Tags:parent, parents, parenting, parenthood, growing up, child rearing, kid, kids, child, young kids, young children, toddler, toddlers, infant, infants, terrible twos, terrible 2s, parenting skills, tantrum, tantrums, immature, immaturity, lobby, lobbies, excuse, excuses, making excuses, bad excuse, bad excuses
"All I can figure is that he must have been inspecting the water quality of our lakes and rivers when he became entangled in cement."
Tags:sleeping with the fishes, cement shoes, mob, mafia, gang, gangs, gangster, gangsters, murder, murders, murderer, murderers, killer, killers, court, courtroom, courtrooms, court case, court cases, judge, judges, excuse, excuses, bad excuse, bad excuses, crime, criminal, law, lawyer, lawyers, attorney, attorneys, barrister, barristers, solicitor, solicitors, drowning, drowned, water quality, inspecting, inspector, inspectors, lake, lakes, river, rivers, cement, witness, witnesses, cover story, cover-up, lie, lies, liar, perjury
"I was going to chuck it all and go to Paris but I didn't have enough frequent-flier miles."
Tags:frequent flier, frequent fliers, frequent flier miles, frequent-flier miles, excuse, excuses, making excuses, bad excuse, bad excuses, failed writer, failed writers, sob story, sob stories, bad writer, bad writers, giving up, give up, show off, show offs, show-off, show-offs, showing off, flirt, flirts, bad date, bad dates, paris
"Is it simply your unsupported word, or did anyone actually see you on the night in question writing a biography of Jane Austen?"
"I thought I'd stay home today and accept the things I can't change."
"Oh, that wasn't me talking. It was the alcohol talking."
Tags:medical bracelet, medical bracelets, modern life, modern times, modern attitudes, medical id bracelet, medical id bracelets, medical alert, medical alerts, medical advice, alert, alerts, warning, warning, first world problems, bug bear, bug bears, complain, complaining, excuse, excuses, bad excuse, bad excuses
"I never said 'I love you'. I said 'I love ya'. Big difference!"
Tags:love, in love, romance, i love you, ily, slang, misinterpretation, misinterpretations, excuse, excuses, making excuses, bad excuse, bad excuses, let down, let downs, let-down, let-downs, break up, break ups, breaking up, break-up, break-ups, split up, splitting up, split ups, split-up, split-ups
"You just missed him. He's gone home."
Tags:snail, snails, snail shell, snail shells, offices, office job, office jobs, office work, office worker, office workers, desk job, desk jobs, business meeting, business meetings, gone home, secretary, secretaries, too late, hide, hiding, excuse, excuses, making excuses, bad excuse, bad excuses, let down, let downs, let-down, let-downs, defence mechanism, defence mechanisms
"If you grant amnesty to people following their conscience everyone will follow his conscience."
"If I've accomplished little, it's because I have giants standing on my shoulders."
Tags:standing on the shoulders of giants, expression, expressions, saying, sayings, idiom, idioms, excuse, excuses, making excuses, bad excuse, bad excuses, life choices, career choices, accomplishments, achievement, achievements, accomplishment, failure, failures, failing, let down, let downs, let-down, let-downs
"You'll have to excuse me- I'm myself today."
"Please forgive Edgar. He has no verbal skills."
"On the other hand, if I die next week this isn't a midlife crisis."
"I felt endangered."
Tags:crime scene, crime scenes, murder, murders, excuse, excuses, bad excuse, bad excuses, self defence, panda, pandas, giant panda, giant pandas, endangered species, self defense, justification, justifications, shoot out, shoot outs, defendant, the defendant, conservation, panda conservation, conservationist, conservationists
"Yeah, yeah- and I invented the ticket."
Tags:the wheel, invention of the wheel, inventing the wheel, speeding ticket, speeding tickets, parking ticket, parking tickets, excuse, excuses, bad excuse, bad excuses, making excuses, police, police man, police men, policeman, policemen, police officer, police officers, traffic cop, traffic cops, caveman, cavemen, cave dweller, cave dwellers, early man, the stone age, neanderthal, neanderthal, prehistory
"It came with the house."
"I stopped to watch the woods fill up with snow."
"It says here that this was his non-productive period."
Tags:artist, artists, modern art, modern artist, modern artists, art market, the art market, art gallery, art galleries, pretentious, pretension, pretentiousness, excuse, excuses, making excuses, bad excuse, bad excuses, procrastination, procrastinator, procrastinators, art speak, art talk, art jargon