Cyclops Notices He's Getting Bald and Decides That's the Last Straw
"You understand I have to ask. You're not some sort of skinhead, are you?"
The Dreadlock Comb-over's one-night beta test.
Tags:combover, combovers, comb-over, comb-overs, bald, balds, balding, balding man, male pattern baldness, beta test, beta tests, test out, tests out, testing out, dreadlock, dreadlocks, unflattering, appropriation, pickup line, pickup lines, flirt, flirts, wig, wigs, hairstyle, hairstyles, unflattering, revolting, gross
"Birth, bed, bath, beer, bankruptcy, bifocals, balding and beyond."
Tags:bed bath and beyond, store, stores, consumer, consumers, consumerism, suburb, suburbs, suburban life, suburban lives, suburban lifestyle, suburban lifestyles, bald, balds, balding, middle age, middle aged, bankruptcy, bankruptcies, alliteration, alliterative, alliterate, alliterates, alliterating, bunion, bunions
"Do you like it? I got it right here on Madison at Executive Ponytails."
"We invented your hair."
Tags:hair, head of hair, heads of hair, bald, balds, balding, male pattern baldness, parent, parents, taunt, taunts, taunting, boomer, boomers, baby boomer, baby boomers, long hair, hippy, hippie, hippies, aging hippy, aging hippies, ageing hippy, ageing hippies, nostalgia, nostalgic, trend, trends, hairstyle, hairstyles, haircut, haircuts, reminisce, reminisces, reminiscing, burger, burgers, fast food, fast foods, generation gap, generation gaps, age gap, age gaps, millennial, millennials
"Come on, dear, you're only as bald as you feel."
Tags:marriage, relationships, insecurity, vanity, psychology, men, bald, balds, balding, male pattern baldness, insecurity, insecurities, insecure, self-conscious, self-consciousness, reassure, reassures, reassurance, reassurances, hollow words, baldness, self-esteem, self-esteem issue, self-esteem issues, mankoff
A halo lifts a toupee off an angel.
"Put it under your pillow, and maybe you'll get a visit from the hair fairy."
Tags:bald, balds, balding, tooth fairy, hair loss, male pattern baldness, baldness, middle age, middle aged, fairy, fairies, fairy tale, fairy tales, hair, hairstyle, hairstyles, grow old, grows old, growing old, hope, hopes, hoping, regrow, regrows, regrowing, reassure, reassures, reassuring, reassurance, reassurances
"Operator, get me my hair!"
"The Five Major Warning Signs of Baldness."
Tags:medical research, science, medical, warning signs of baldness, vanity, men, the five major, experts, ego, psychology, baldness, hair, hair loss, male pattern baldness, warning sign, warning signs, early warning, early warnings, bald, balds, balding, baldness, stage, stages, middle age, middle aged, middle-aged, mankoff
"Oh, just picking up the pieces of my life after a really traumatic haircut."
Tags:haircut, traumatic, middle age, hair, haircuts, ptsd, post traumatic stress disorder, bald, balds, balding, embarrass, embarrasses, embarrassing, trauma, pick up the pieces, picking up the pieces, dramatic, overdramatic, over-dramatic, humiliate, humiliating, humiliation, bad haircut, bad haircuts, bad hair day, bad hair days, self-conscious, self-consciousness, middle age, midlife, mankoff
A la recherche des cheveux perdus.