Blind Dates Cartoons

"Hi. I'm John, your date for this evening. I've brought my résumé and letters of recommendation."

"OK, Cynthia, I'll tell you about my hopes and dreams, my joys and my passions. But be forewarned - they all concern a particular sports team."

"I can't cook, but I can pay."

"We couldn't connect. He kept spouting technobabble, and I, of course, kept coming back with psychobabble."

"It's not a completely blind date - he sent me some promotional material."

"I'm a fancier of dogs and interesting men."

"He's old money, new media, middle-aged body."

Dan, Carla's interests include brooding over failed relationships and fending off her mother's pleas for grandchildren. Carla, Dan is terrified of commitment and has a negative bank balance."

"In my ad, I lied about my age."

"But enough about the dollar. Let's talk about me!"

"Gee whiz, Mr. Collins—two hundred and six isn't old!"

"You're not at all like your answering machine."

"You don't sound anything like your e-mail."

"I always wanted power, but now, I don't know, the trappings of power may be enough."

"She stood me up. I hosed off my Crocs for nothing."

"I'd invite you up, but I'm trying to preserve the crime scene."

"Frances tells me you're a communications major."

"Well, I guess if breathing through your mouth has kept you alive this far..."

"My girlfriend said you were cute, but, gosh, she didn't say how cute."

"I'm not going to say any more, Francis. It's your face, and it was your mustache."

"You're really nice, Richard. I was hoping I could fix you up with my mom."

"Tell me what you think of the menu. I wrote it."

"I don't remember him or the meal or what movie we saw. All I remember is I wore the right jeans."

"Gee, you didn't mention your wart in your personal."

"Jane Goodall said you were lots of fun."