"The machine's done something really weird to Mr. Hendrickson."
"And now we just relax, settle down, and smother them until they crack."
"Is it just me, or has it suddenly gotten awfully quiet around here?"
"I bit someone once. It tasted like chicken."
"Your mom cooks the chicken, but your dad makes it dance."
"Didn't you find it attractive that he was a "Free Range Chicken'?"
Tags:chicken, chickens, free range, free range chicken, free range chicken, free range egg, free range eggs, farm animal, farm animals, divorce, divorces, divorce law, divorce lawyer, divorce lawyers, divorce attorney, divorce attorney, attractive, attractiveness, regret, regrets, marriages, break up, break ups, breaking up, break-up, break-ups, split up, splitting up, split ups, split-up, split-ups, separation, separations
"Hello, son. I suppose chicken farming doesn't seem so bad now."
Tags:west, western, wild west, wildwest, hillbilly, hillbillies, shack, shacks, farm, farms, farmer, farmers, farming, ranch, ranches, cattle ranches, cattle ranch, chicken, chickens, hen, hens, poultry, chicken farming, agriculture, agribusiness, parent, parents, parenting, parenthood, father, fathers, son, sons, child, children, businessman, businessmen, businessperson, businesspeople, business executive, chicken farmers, business man, business men, business people, business person, executive, ceo, depression, economic depression, financial crash, crash, crashes, financial crashes, crisis, economic crisis, financial crisis, city, cities, city worker, big city, the big city, debt, in debt, city workers, hot shot, hot shots, farm house, farm house, traders, trading, trader, stock market, stock market trader
A chicken and an egg racing to take a number to see which one of them will come first.
"I stuffed it with things found around the house."
Tags:turkey, turkeys, thanksgiving, chicken, chickens, cook, cooks, cooking, stuffing, dressing, dressings, dinner, dinners, meal, meals, supper, suppers, misunderstand, misunderstanding, misunderstandings, bad cook, bad cooks, found object, found objects, loose change, haphazard, christmas, christmas dinner, banquet, dinner party, dinner parties, disaster, disasters
"You'll get right back over here if you know what's good for you!"
Tags:animal, animals, talking animal, talking animals, chicken, chickens, hen, hens, poultry, egg, eggs, farm, farms, farmer, farmers, kid, kids, child, children, mom, moms, mum, mums, mother, mothers, the early years, childhood, nursery rhyme, nursery rhymes, rhyme, rhymes, mother goose, literature, children's story, children's stories, fictional character, fictional characters, humpty dumpty, dangerous, risky, risk taker, risk takers
"They should never have allowed us to be free-range."
Tags:chicken, chickens, free range chicken, free range chickens, free-range chicken, free-rang chickens, animal rights, escape, escaping, wander off, wandering off, farm animal, farm animals, chicken farm, chicken farms, farm, farms, farmer, farmers, antarctica, the antarctic, runaway, runaways, running away
"Before I serve you dinner, it was in the chicken's last wishes that you watch his video will."
Tags:restaurant, restaurants, dining out, eating out, meal, meals, food, eating, dining, dinner, dinners, waiter, waiters, server, servers, service, customer service, chicken, chickens, meat, serving, video, videos, film, films, movie, movies, death, dead, dying wish, dying wishes, last wish, last wishes, last request, last requests, will, wills, customer, customers, diner, diners, vegetarian, vegetarians, vegetarianism, veganism, vegan, vegans, television, televisions, tv, tvs, t.v., t.v.s
"I'm a free woman. Edgar tried to cross the road."
Tags:why did the chicken cross the road, bad joke, bad jokes, riddle, riddles, husband, husbands, wife, wives, relationship, relationships, couple, couples, spouses, spouse, marriage, married, chicken, chickens, single, newly single, widow, widows, death, die, died, dark humor, dark humour, black humor, black humour
"Half a dozen brown—three large, three jumbo!"
Tags:animal, animals, rooster, roosters, chicken, chickens, hen, hens, chick, chicks, egg, eggs, large, brown, jumbo, kid, kids, child, children, baby, babies, pregnancy, parent, parents, parenting, parenthood, father, fathers, fatherhood, dad, dads, family, families, new parent, new parents, hospital, hospitals, medical, medicine, doctor, doctors, patient, patients, health, health care, healthcare, maternity ward, obstetrics ward, delivery ward, waiting area, waiting areas, waiting room, waiting rooms, new father, new dad, expectant parents, expectant father, expectant dad, delivery, deliveries, delivering a baby, having a baby, good news
"Even more dangerous than crossing the road is being undercooked."
Tags:animal, animals, talking animal, talking animals, chicken, chickens, hen, hens, rooster, roosters, chick, chicks, road, roads, farm, farms, farmer, farmers, poultry, why did the chicken cross the road, joke, jokes, undercooked, under cooked, pink, danger, dangerous, risky, salmonella, campylobacter, hygiene, bacteria, death, deadly, food poisoning, food borne illness, foodborne illness, advice, advising, life lesson, life lessons, medical, medicine, health inspector, health inspectors, health inspection, food safety, health, unhealthy
"You wouldn't understand,...it's a poultry thing."
"No point going to sleep now."
Tags:rooster, roosters, chicken, chickens, cockerel, cockerels, dawn, dawns, crack of dawn, late night, late nights, boy's night, boys night, boy's nights, boys nights, sleep, sleeping, night time, night times, night-time, night-times, rooster call, rooster calls, cockerel call, cockerel calls, gamer, gamers, gaming, video game, video games, computer game, computer games
The Nervous Gourmet:Low-Risk Chicken
Tags:risk averse, risk, risky, risk aversion, anxious, anxiety, paranoia, paranoid, cooking, cookery, cookery classes, recipe, recipes, cook, chef, chefs, cooks, absurd, spoof, spoofs, parody, parodies, parodied, worry, worrisome, worry wart, worried, chicken, chickens, poultry, nervous, nervousness, nerve, unnerved, woman, women, house wife, housewife, housewives, learn to cook, learning, learn, modern, modern life
A chicken looks at a computer screen that reads "Y2K is coming! Y2K is coming!!".
Tags:animal, animals, chicken, chickens, hen, hens, poultry, henny penny, chicken little, fairytale, fairytales, fairy tale, fairy tales, children's story, children's stories, story, stories, fable, fables, literature, children's literature, fictional character, fictional characters, the sky is falling, technology, computer, computers, laptop, laptops, warning, warnings, new year, new years, new year's day, new year's eve, millennium, new millennium, 1999, 2000, year 2000 problem, y2k problem, y2k, millennium bug, y2k bug, panic, panics, panicking
"But before you even think about going under the knife, I'd like to recommend a good pluck and cook man."
Tags:vet, vets, veterinarian, veterinarians, bird, birds, chicken, chickens, hen, hens, rooster, roosters, play on words, word play, wordplay, under the knife, surgery, surgeries, operate, operation, operations, surgeon, surgeons, doctor, doctors, general practitioner, general practitioners, medical check up, medical check ups, hospital, hospitals, doctors appointment, doctors appointments, doctor's appointment, doctor's appointments, physician, physicians, chef, chefs, cook, cooks
Chicken standing on a platform on a stage with three horns in front of it and wearing a top hat; a sign on the side of the platform reads "National Endowment for the Arts - Seal of Approval."
Tags:public funding, funding, arts, debate, debates, violence, politics, government, governments, congress, national endowment for the arts, politicians, politicians, artist, artists, art, money, finances, financing, controversy, controversies, defunding, controversial, performer, performers, performance, performances, entertainer, entertainers, entertainment, animal, animals, trick, tricks, chicken, chickens, hen, hens, horn, horns, circus, music, seal of approval, seals of approval, approved
"Why do you think you cross the road?"
Tags:therapy, therapist, therapists, psychology, psychologist, psychologists, psychiatry, psychiatrist, psychiatrists, counselor, counselors, counseling, counsellor, counsellors, counselling, how does that make you feel, feelings, motivation, motivations, motive, motives, animal, animals, chicken, chickens, cross the road, why did the chicken cross the road, crossing the road, joke, jokes, classic joke, classic jokes, mental health, health care, healthcare
"Sorry. You want Manny Hanny. This is Henny Penny."
Q: Why did the chicken cross the road? A: To get to the other side.