A man reads the obituary and compares his age to the deceased.
Tags:age, obit, obits, obituary, obituaries, dead, dying, die, dies, mortality, mortal, mortals, long life, long lives, short life, short lives, compare, compares, feel your age, feeling your age, ageing, aging, grow old, grows old, growing old, comparison, comparisons, insecure, insecurity, insecurities
"Some of us are unsung heroes."
Tags:hero, heroes, heroic, unsung hero, unsung heroes, superhero, superheroes, superheroic, converse, conversing, converses, compare, compares, comparison, comparisons, unfavorable comparison, unfavorable comparisons, contrast, contrasts, contrasting, out-of-favor, out-of-favour, threatened, threatening, accomplishment, accomplishments
"How are her scores?"
Tags:score, scores, test score, test scores, compare, compares, comparing, comparison, comparisons, parent, parents, parenting, mom, moms, mum, mums, mother, mothers, pride, proud, toddler, toddlers, competitive, competition, competitions, stroller, strollers, start young, starts young, starting young, kid, kids, young age, overbearing
"You need to stop comparing yourself to other people."
Tags:compare, compares, comparing, comparing yourself, comparison, comparisons, insecure, insecurity, insecurities, short, short person, short people, compare yourself, comparing yourself, therapist, therapists, therapy, psychologist, psychologists, psychology, psychiatrist, psychiatrists, psychiatry, inferior, inferiority complex, inferiority complexes, complex, complexes, worry, worries, worrying, anxiety, anxieties, chronic anxiety
"Can I see that 'National Law Journal' when you're through with it?"
"Why don't you try one before you start comparing them to oranges?"
Tags:apple, apples, fruit of knowledge, tree of knowledge, tempt, tempts, tempting, temptations, adam & eve, garden of eden, serpent, compare, compares, comparison, comparisons, comparing, apples to oranges, cliche, cliches, saying, sayings, expression, expressions, idiom, idioms, judgement, judgements, judgemental, judgment, judgments, judgmental, invalid, inaccurate, imprecise
Snow White and Sleeping Beauty Have Tea
Tags:gossip, gossips, gossiping, sleeping beauty, snow white, compare, compares, comparing, fairy tale, fairy tales, fairytale, fairytales, legend, legends, compare notes, comparing notes, comparison, comparisons, comparing, out of body experience, out of body experiences, experience, experiences, gossip, gossips, gossiping
"If you think Columbus is steamed, wait till you run into Harry Truman."
Tags:columbus, truman, harry truman, christopher columbus, revisionist, revisionists, revisionist history, revisionist histories, villain, villains, villainous, bush, george bush, george w. bush, angel, angels, american, americans, historian, historians, compare, compares, comparison, comparisons, insult, insults, insulting, reevaluate, reevaluates, reevaluation, american history, united states history, columbus day, afterlife, afterlives
"I've read all your books and seen all your plays, and I wear your 'Gimme' cap."
Tags:writer, writers, novel, novella, novels, novel writing, poem, poet, poetry, poets, poetic, literature, literary, word play, play on words, ironic, irony, author, authors, authored, book, books, book lover, writing, should be writing, you should be writing, manuscript, artistic, artist, artists, art, arts, culture, cultured, writer's block, bookworm, book worm, bookworms, book worm, book, books, novel, novels, library, librarians, librarian, book lover, book lovers, literature, literary, lit, lit major, read, reading, avid reader, readers, reader, novel, novels, novelist, novelists, ghostwriter, ghostwriters, signing, book signing, bookshop, bookshops, meet the, fame, famous, celebrity, celebrities, plays, play, playoff, playoffs, cap, caps, hat, hats, compare, compares, merchandise, merchandising, merch, gimme, sports
"Compared to the Howells, we still are young Republicans."
Tags:young republican, young republicans, republican, republicans, republican party, age, ages, aging, ageing, demographic, demographics, geriatric, geriatrics, senior, seniors, senrior citizen, senior citizens, identity crisis, midlife crisis, midlife crises, compare, compares, comparing, comparison, comparisons, worry, worries, worrying, mortal, mortals, mortality, gop, grand old party
"Well, now that we've established that we're all wearing Tommy Hilfiger underwear, can we proceed to the substance of the meeting?"
Tags:designer, designers, designer label, designer labels, fashion designer, fashion designers, underwear, underpants, compare, compares, comparing, comparison, comparisons, divert, diverts, diverting, diversion, diversions, boardroom, boardrooms, board room, board rooms, meeting, meetings, business meeting, business meetings, drop your pants, drop your trousers, business culture, corporate culture
"Arthur and I have been together now for four and a half years, which is a personal best for both of us."
Tags:marriage, marriages, long-term relationships, serial monogamist, serial monogamists, monogamy, personal best, personal bests, date, dates, dating, dating life, compare, compares, comparison, comparisons, record, personal record, personal records, achievement, achievements, personal achievement, personal achievements
"Tommy and Ben are like Green Berets, Dan and Jerry are Navy Seals and me and Scott are like private contractors."
Tags:private contractor, private contractors, merc, mercs, mercenary, mercenaries, contracting, contract work, green beret, green berets, navy seal, navy seals, elite, elites, fighting force, fighting forces, squirtgun, squirtguns, squirt gun, squirt guns, compare, compares, comparison, comparisons, hyperbole, hyperbolic, exaggerate, exaggerates, exaggerating, asinine, ridiculous
"A phony attorney…I'm so disappointed, son. Your brother is a phony doctor."
Tags:phony, doctor, doctors, physician, physicians, nag, nags, nagging, jewish mother, mom, mom, mother, mothers, parent, parents, disappointment, disappointments, passive aggressive, passive-aggressiveness, fake, fakes, faking, faker, fakers, brother, brothers, ne'er do well, compare, compares, comparison, success, successful, con man, con men, con artist, con artists, con, cons, confidence man, confidence men, expectations, high expectations
"Both of you shut up and thank God you're not me."
Tags:q-tip, q-tips, nail clipper, nail clippers, ptsd, post traumatic stress, post traumatic stress disorder, floss, flosses, flossing, dental floss, dental flosses, nail clipper, nail clippers, hygiene, hygienic, unhygienic, digusting, gross, habit, habits, clean, cleans, cleaning, cleanse, cleanses, cleansing, medicine cabinet, medicine cabinets, compare, compares, comparing, comparison, comparisons, war wound, war wounds, wound, wounds
"I am so past enlightenment."
Tags:enlightenment, enlightened, buddhist, buddhists, buddhism, monk, monks, religious, philosophy, philosopher, philosophers, brag, brags, bragging, braggart, braggarts, arrogant, arrogance, cocky, cockiness, humility, humble, humbleness, compare, compares, comparing, hypocrite, hypocrites, hypocrisy
"Yes, I must admit I've done rather well here."
Stan Mack's Real Life Funnies: Alumnae News
Tags:alum, alums, alumni, alumnae, chance encounter, chance encounters, old friend, old friends, college friend, college friends, art school, art schools, visual arts, visual arts major, visual arts majors, faux pas, cringe, cringes, cringing, awkward, awkward scenario, awkward scenarios, awkward scene, awkward scenes, copywriter, copywriters, writing copy, copy, advertising agency, advertising agencies, career, careers, success, successes, successful, compare, compares, comparing, comparison, comparisons, waitress, waitresses, fail, fails, failing, failure, failures