"I always forget - is it Kirsten or Kristin?"
Tags:couple, couples, caveman, cavemen, neanderthal, neanderthals, name, names, forget, forgets, forgetting, faux pas, similar, similarity, confuse, confusing, confuses, confusion, memory, bad memory, forgettable, small talk, introduction, introductions, introduce, introducing, mutual friend, mutual friends, friendship, friendships
A giant ape struggles to climb twin towers.
"I don't know, Doc, a man can 'spring forward' and 'fall back' just so many times."
"Does the No. 1 stop here and does that go to Penn Station and can I get a train there to Philadelphia and then how do I get to Walnut Street?"
Tags:bus, buses, subway, subways, tube, train, trains, tubes, mass transit, mass transits, transport, transporting, transports, direction, directions, confusing, annoy, annoying, talk, talking, advice, advise, adviser, confuse, confused, help, helped, annoyed, annoys, questioning, questions, questioned, public transport, public transports, chat, chatting, local, locals, pester, pestering, bother
"You're supposed to grow a lot of little ones."
Tags:tree, trees, nature, fruit tree, fruit trees, fruit-tree, fruit-trees, hothouse, hothouses, hot house, hot houses, pear, pears, pear tree, pear trees, spring, springtime, parent, parents, parenting, parenthood, peartree, peartrees, instruct, instruction, instructions, misunderstand, misunderstanding, misinterpret, misinterpretation, confuse, confusing, confused
Viva Las Vegas.
Tags:vegas, las vegas, city of sin, children, child, betting, drinking, drinks, restaurant, restaurants, gambling, gamble, gambles, casino, casinos, family, families, journey, journeys, travel, travelling, tourist, tourism, vacation, vacations, viva, annoy, annoying, unsuited, confuse, confused, confusing, different, tip, tipping, tips, tipped, trip, trips
"I can't remember if I didn't like his second book or his second wife."
Tags:party, parties, cocktail party, cocktail parties, host, hosts, second wife, second wives, author, authors, women discussing men, remarry, remarriage, bad author, bad authors, mix up, mixed up, confuse, confused, confusion, unsure, modern life, modern times, modern attitudes, boring conversation, boring conversations
"It turns out I've been inhaling when I should be exhaling and exhaling when I should be inhaling."
Tags:yoga, doing yoga, modern life, modern times, modern attitudes, exercise, exercises, exercising, exercise routine, exercise routines, yoga routine, yoga routine, mistake, mistakes, breathing routine, breathing routines, mindfulness, inhaling, exhaling, breathing, mess up, confuse, confused, confusion
"By God, for a minute there it suddenly all made sense!"
Tags:writer, writers, novel, novella, novels, novel writing, poem, poet, poetry, poets, poetic, literature, literary, word play, play on words, ironic, irony, author, authors, authored, book, books, book lover, writing, should be writing, you should be writing, manuscript, artistic, artist, artists, art, arts, culture, cultured, writer's block, bookworm, book worm, bookworms, book worm, book, books, novel, novels, library, librarians, librarian, book lover, book lovers, literature, literary, lit, lit major, read, reading, avid reader, readers, reader, novel, novels, novelist, novelists, sense, complex, complexity, age, aged, ageing, aging, old age, elder, elderly, confused, confuse
Viva Las Vegas.
Tags:vegas, las vegas, city of sin, children, child, betting, drinking, drinks, restaurant, restaurants, gambling, gamble, gambles, casino, casinos, family, families, journey, journeys, travel, travelling, tourist, tourism, vacation, vacations, viva, annoy, annoying, unsuited, confuse, confused, confusing, different, trip, trips
"I regret that my poor choice of words caused some people to understand what I was saying."
Tags:business, businessman, businessmen, politician, politicians, government, governments, speech, speeches, press conference, press conferences, media, press, camera, cameras, political campaign, political campaigns, election, elections, election campaign, election campaigns, scandal, scandals, political scandal, political scandals, obfuscate, obfuscating, confuse, conceal, concealing, obscure, obscuring, hide, hiding, choice of words, word, words, phrasing, understand, understandable, regret, regrets, trouble, problem, problems, issue, issues
"Don't let the infinity throw you."
Tags:vanishing point, perspective, warped perspective, infinite, infinity, math, maths, mathematical, math jokes, meta, metaphysical, office, offices, work life, work, corridor, corridors, disturb, disturbed, illusion, illusions, art, artist, artistic, optical, confuse, confused, confusing, hate mondays, monday, just another day at the office, optical illusion, science, scientific, geometry, geometric, visual
Tags:plumber, plumbing, emergency plumber, emergency plumbers, plumber, emergency plumbing, superintendent, superintendents, building superintendent, building superintendents, super, supers, caretaker, caretakers, building manager, building managers, apartments, apartment, maintenance, maintenance man, furniture, furniture repair, confusion, confuse, confused, burst pipe, burst pipes, pipe, pipes, water, water leak, leaking water, repair, repairs, repair man, repair men, troubleshoot, troubleshooting, absurd, modern furniture, modern furniture design
"Objection, Your Honor! The prosecution is combining dog years and people years in a callous and deliberate attempt to confuse the witness."
Tags:objection, objections, prosecution, prosecutions, dog years, prosecutor, prosecutors, prosecuting, confusion, create confusion, creating confusion, confuse, witness, witnesses, attorney, attorneys, lawyer, lawyers, obfuscate, obfuscates, obfuscating, obfuscation, stonewall, stonewalls, stonewalling, measure of time, measures of time
"If homosexuality is inherited, shouldn't it have died out by now?"
Tags:lgbt, lgbt_, lgbtq+, lgbtq, sexualities, theory, social theory, logic, logic game, logical, logically, question, questions, counter-argument, counter argument, counter, good counter, counterpoint, counter-point, shower thoughts, confusion, confuse, confused, federal law, federal laws, 2016, equality, marriage equality
"Howard! You slept in the wrong apartment again."
Tags:love triangle, love triangles, cheat, cheater, cheaters, affair, affairs, having an affair, extra marital affair, extra marital affairs, two timer, two timers, two timing, fling, flings, unfaithfulness, bad husband, bad husbands, bad relationship, bad relationships, apartment, apartments, confuse, confused, confusion, oblivious, obliviousness, identical, mix up, mixed up, modern life, identical apartment, identical apartments
"I'm glad this case could be settled out of context."
Tags:settle, settlement, settles, settlements, settling, settles, out of court, out-of-court, out of context, out-of-context, confuse, confusion, play on words, playing on words, judge, judges, law, lawyers, attorney, attorneys, nature, natural, wilderness, country, rural, out of court settlement, attorney, attorneys, sue, suing
The Guy Who Mixed Up His To-Do List And His Bucket List
"Seriously, who is it?"
A man asks for directions