Counsel Cartoons

"What is friendship if not constant amateurish psychoanalysis?"

"You're not crazy. You want crazy?"

". . . and I haven't met anyone interesting in years." "What am I-chopped liver?"

"Legally, I have the right to talk as slowly and boringly about all your options as I want."

"Counsel will kindly refrain from testifiduction and hippothanatology – in lay terms, leading the witness and beating a dead horse."

"Objection, Your Honor! Alleged killer whale."

"On the advice of counsel, Senator, I'd like to sing 'The Star-Spangled Banner.' "

Whosoever draweth out the publishing, recording, and distribution contracts from the stone shall forever be acknowledged as the Duke of Earl, and nothing can stop him.

"All of a sudden, everyone seems younger than I am."

"Talk to me. You have wounds. I have salt."

"As your attorney, I must strongly advise you against bringing the high heat."

Jumping Into the Season's First Pile of Subpoenas

"The tissues are for crying."

"There's no point in our being friends if you won't let me fix you."

"Then I thought, Why should I spend it all on fancy lawyers?"

"I made partner!"

"From now on, Ted, I will speak only when adequately represented by counsel."

"May I consult with counsel?"

“This daily metamorphosis never fails to amaze me. Around the house, I’m a perfect idiot. I come to court, futon a black robe, and, by God, I’m it!”

"You have a pretty good case, Mr. Pitkin. How much justice can you afford?"

"Geese fly in a V, son--attorneys fly in a wedge."

"As soon as I get the paperwork together I'll file an appeal. Sometimes there are just not enough hours in the day."

"Have you, or any of your acquaintances, ever been described as 'frolicsome'?"

"Do you have a good attorney or a bad attorney?"