Customer Service Cartoons

"Attention passengers. Flight 369 has been cancelled due to our desire to ruin your life."

"Sorry folks-it's not what you ordered, but everyone is getting fettucine until we fix the computer."

"Please stay on the line. All of our customer-service representatives are kidding around and throwing paper airplanes at each other."

"Thank you, sir. I see you're not hopelessly liberal."

"If you represent special interests, I can seat you immediately."

"Sorry for the wait, but it's been like Grand Central station in here."

"Certainly. A party of four at seven-thirty in the name of Dr. Jennings. May I ask whether that is an actual medical degree or a Ph.D.?"

"Pillows for sleeping on are downstairs. These are all for screaming into."

"Mustard? Ketchup? Mayo? Talk to me, old man."

"Would you mind bringing me a Western utensil?"

"Not to worry—I'm going to put our best-looking people on the job."

"As a courtesy for the inconvenience, please accept a voucher for three additional hours of your life, redeemable upon your death."

"I can't quite picture who would enjoy a gift in that price range."

"I'm afraid the chocolate cake puts you over the calorie cap."

"With your large bucket of popcorn, you get your choice of Milk Duds, Jujubes or Strawberry Twizzlers."

"What will it take to put one of you two into a brand-new Eterna-5000 today?"

"Is everything O.K., sir?"

"And should you retain us, Mr. Hodal, you'll find that we're more than just a law firm."

Lunch Broker

"And while you're waiting for your drinks can I get you something from the bar?"

"Can the chef prepare it in some way no one has ever prepared anything before?"

"I can recommend the coho salmon in a wine-dill sauce, with a suggested retail price of twenty-four ninety-five. However, you may have it for only eighteen ninety-five if you order now."

"What's wrong with that quiet little table for two in front of the Rangers game?"

"Everything's fine, thanks."

"What do we have to do to get some more crayons over here?"