"Now for the high point of the evening - a videotape of my elevation to regional director of marketing."
Tags:videotape, videotapes, highlight, highlights, highlight reel, highlight reels, ego, egomaniac, egomaniacs, egotist, egotists, egotistical, self-promoter, self-promoters, self-promotion, ego stroker, ego strokers, ego stroking, bore, bores, boring, dinner party, dinner parties, uninteresting, toot your own horn, tooting your own horn
"Hey, Doug! Great Party!"
Tags:party animal, party animals, party, parties, chandelier, chandeliers, partier, partiers, partying, cocktail party, faux pas, faux-pas, embarrassing, embarrassment, embarrassments, embarrassed, wild party, wild parties, boring, bored, cocktail party, dinner party, dinner parties, cocktail parties
"Just don't be yourself."
"You were wonderful at the Gardners' last night, Fred, when you turned on the charm."
Tags:cocktail party, cocktail parties, dinner party, dinner parties, dinner, dinners, charm, charms, charming, compliment, compliments, complimenting, praise, praises, praising, husband, husbands, wife, wives, spouse, spouses, good impression, good impressions, impression, impressions, flirt, flirts, flirtatious
"He's not much fun, but he's made entirely from recycled materials."
Tags:environmental, environmentalism, environmentalist, eco friendly, eco-friendly, dinner party, party, parties, dinner parties, conversation, boring, boredom, bored, bore, chat, chatting, talk, talking, bar, bars, date, dates, unoriginal, originality, original, couple, couples, recycle, recycled, recycling
"My friend with the long-haired dachshunds is Noreen."
"Did we mention that we spent last summer in Maine?"
"Oh God, here they come-act green."
"We didn't have time to pick up a bottle of wine, but this is what we would have spent."
"All this talk of Viagra and penile implants reminds me of a charming story about my own penis."
"You look great. Let's go!"
Tags:snail, snails, snail shell, snail shells, hide, hiding, dressing up, party, parties, dinner party, dinner parties, appearance, self conscious, self consciousness, self-conscious, self-consciousness, make up, make-up, beauty ritual, beauty rituals, beauty ideal, beauty ideals, feminine beauty ideal, feminine beauty ideals
"Sure, they drank it - but did they get it?"
Tags:wine, wines, wine drinker, wine drinkers, wine connoisseur, wine connoisseurs, wine expert, wine experts, wine enthusiast, wine enthusiasts, drink, drinks, drinker, drinkers, alcohol, fine wine, dinner party, dinner parties, guest, guests, host, hosts, hostess, hostesses, snob, snobs, snobby, pretentious, couple, couples, relationship, relationships, marriage, married, husband, husbands, wife, wives, spouse, spouses, men, man, woman, women
"I do hope you're here for the circumcision."
Tags:death, dead, die, dies, dying, grim, grim reaper, reapers, reaper, creepy, scythe, scythes, soul, souls, eternal soul, underworld, religion, religious, religious imagery, modern, modern life, unexpected, guest, guests, doctor, doctors, knife, knives, jewish, jewish people, party, parties, dinner party, dinner parties, bah mitzvah, knives, sharp, cut, cutting, circumcision, shpasik, jtoons
"We're running late. Just pick a facial expression already."
Tags:facial expression, facial expressions, jack o' lanten, jack o lantern, pumpkin, pumpkins, halloween, carve, carves, carving, indecision, get ready, gets ready, getting ready, hairstyle, hairstyles, makeup, make-up, get dressed, getting dressed, slow, slowly, punctual, punctuality, vain, vanity, gender stereotype, gender stereotyping, dinner party, dinner parties
"Judith is someone who needs her sleep."
"We're still moving in."
Tags:move, moves, move in, moves in, moving in, box, boxes, moving box, moving boxes, unpack, unpacks, unpacking, dinner party, dinner parties, host, hosts, hosting, lazy, laziness, procrastinate, procrastinates, procrastinating, procrastination, slacker, slackers, slack off, slacks off, slacking off
"We're still getting used to feeling patriotic."
"I stuffed it with things found around the house."
Tags:turkey, turkeys, thanksgiving, chicken, chickens, cook, cooks, cooking, stuffing, stuffings, dressing, dressings, dinner, dinners, meal, meals, supper, suppers, misunderstand, misunderstanding, misunderstandings, bad cook, bad cooks, found object, found objects, loose change, haphazard, christmas, christmas dinner, banquet, dinner party, dinner parties, disaster, disasters
"Tell them that hilarious story about your colonoscopy."
Tags:colonoscopy, colonoscopies, funny story, funny stories, dinner party, dinner parties, conversation, conversations, conversation starter, conversation starters, chat, chats, chatting, small talk, hilarious, colon, eat, eats, eating, put off, puts off, putting off, gross, gross story, gross stories, disgusting story, disgusting stories
"When portions are this huge, I eat half now and the rest in a few minutes."
Tags:restaurant, waiter, waiters, food, foodie, foodies, food lover, food lovers, food blog, food blogs, food blogger, food bloggers, eating out, out to eat, couple, couples, diet, dieting, diets, lose, lose weight, overweight, over weight, binge, binging, carb, carbs, pasta, pasta lover, italian food, italian, italian cuisine, portion, portions, portion size, portion sizes, omad, if, intermittent fasting, calories, calorie, cico, calorie counting, calories in calories out, good food, dinner, dinner party, dinner parties
"It started out with lactose, but now he's intolerant of everything."
Tags:intolerant, intolerance, lactose-intolerant, lactose-intolerance, lactose intolerant, lactose intolerance, milk, dairy, allergy, allergies, dietary issues, dinner party, dinner parties, relationship, relationships, relationship issues, marriage, married life, husband, husbands, wife, wives, couple, couples, prejudice, dislike, hate, bias, biased, irritable
"Listen up, everybody—Charles is going to fill us in about the Grenache grape."
Tags:wine, wines, wine snob, wine snobs, bore, bores, boring, grenache, varietal, varietals, sommelier, sommeliers, sarcasm, sarcastic, wine tasting, wine tasting, party, parties, cocktail party, cocktail parties, guest, guests, drink, drinks, drinking, alcohol, alcoholic, alcoholics, alcoholism, irony, ironic, dinner party, dinner parties, lecture, lectures, lecturing
"Barry made the wine. I made the cheese."
"Have you ever checked out London?"
Tags:london, travel, travels, traveling, traveler, travelers, traveller, travellers, travelling, world traveler, world travelers, sophisticates, sophisticates, sophisticated, wealthy, rich, riches, dinner party, dinner parties, pretentious, pretentiousness, snob, snobs, snobby, snobbery, cliche, cliches, cliched, vacation, vacations, vacationing
"We'll alternate the windbags with the hard-of-hearing."
Tags:dinner party, dinner parties, host, hosts, hostess, hostess, party planning, party planner, party planners, seat, seats, seating, seating arrangement, seating arrangements, seating plan, seating plans, seating chart, seating charts, party, parties, dinner, dinners, guest, guests, diner, diners, alternate, windbag, windbags, talker, talkers, hard-of-hearing, waiter, waiters, server, servers, conversation, conversations, banquet, banquets