"Fortunately treatment will be relatively inexpensive since you have the generic form of the disease!"
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medical, medicine, medicines, meds, drug, pill, pills, pharmaceutical, pharmaceuticals, prescription, prescriptions, sickness, sick, ill, illness, disease, diseases, money, expensive, inexpensive, cheap, treatment, treatments, cure, cures, healthcare, generic, generics, doctor, doctors, big pharma, pharmaceutical company, pharmaceutical companies, patient, patients"I'd have been here sooner if it hadn't been for early detection."
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early detection, diagnosis, diagnoses, medical advance, medical advances, terminal, terminal illness, terminal illnesses, uncurable, condition, conditions, pearly gates, afterlife, st. peter, saint peter, heaven, heaven's gate, rare disease, rare diseases, disease, diseases, illness, illnesses, sickness, sick, prolonging lifeA woman on a beach boardwalk looks shocked as a topless man walks past her with a back tattoo that reads "I got hepatitis at Randy's Tattoo Parlor."
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beach, beaches, seaside, seashore, tattoo, tattoos, tattoo artist, tattoo artists, tattoo shop, tattoo shops, tattoo parlor, tattoo parlors, tattoo parlour, tattoo parlours, tattooist, tattooists, tattooed, tats, tat, hygiene, unhygienic, hepatitis, medical, medicine, disease, diseases, dangerous, risky, risk, advertising, advertisement, advertisements, ad, ads, marketing, bad marketing, pr, p.r., public relations, scratcher, scratchers, health, body art"We're pretty sure it's the West Nile Virus."
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egypt, egyptian, egyptians, mummy, mummies, pharaoh, pharaohs, outbreak, outbreaks, west nile, west nile virus, virus, viruses, disease, diseases, pandemic, pandemics, epidemic, epidemics, flu, influenza, cold, colds, common cold, common colds, telltale sign, telltale signs, sign, signs, diagnosis, diagnoses, diagnose, mosquito, mosquitoes, mosquito bite, mosquito bites, doctor, doctors"This will buy you four months.
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doctor, doctors, shot, shots, injection, injections, drug, pharmaceutical, pharmaceuticals, big pharma, prescription, prescriptions, medical problem, medical problems, disease, diseases, illness, illnesses, booster, booster shot, booster shots, vaccine, vaccines, vaccination, vaccinations, buy time, buys time, buying time, terminal, terminal illness, terminal illnesses, diagnosis, prognosis, prognoses, diagnoses, physician, physicians, comfort, comforting, bedside manner"Come quickly—I think I had an out-of-pocket experience."
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doctor, doctors, hospital, hospitals, medicine, medicines, health, healthy, health-care, health care, healthcare, medicare, medi care, obamacare, obama care, health insurance, insurance, medical insurance, patient, patients, nurse, out-of-pocket, out of pocket, illness, ill, sick, sickness, disease, diseases, get well, get well soon, critic, critical, critique, critically"It's a very rare disease - it doesn't have a cure. It doesn't even have a spokesperson."
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disease, diseases, diagnosis, diagnosed, rare, rarity, rarities, illness, illnesses, spokesperson, spokespeople, pr, public relations, publicity, unknown, unusual, pharmaceutical, public relations, cure, cures, incurable"Please to meet you, though I'm sorry about the circumstances."
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disease, diseases, infection, infections, illness, infectious disease, infectious diseases, get well soon, contamination, patient, patients, introduction, introductions, first meeting, first meetings, patient zero, isolation room, isolation rooms, deadly disease, deadly diseases, doctor, doctors, hospital, hospitals"Look – now I've gone and caught your stupid disease!"
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doctor, doctors, doctors surgery, doctors surgeries, exam room, examination room, medical examination, medical examinations, medical, gp, general practitioner, gps, general practitioners, family doctor, family doctors, disease, diseases, contagious, contagious disease, contagious diseases, contagion, infectious disease, infectious diseases, infectious, infection, bedside manner, bad bedside manner, unprofessional, unprofessional behavior, unprofessional behaviour,"Personally, I don't see the big deal about the ice-bucket challenge."
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ice, ice water, ice bucket challenge, als, amyotrophic lateral sclerosis, lou gehrig's disease, disease, diseases, raise awareness, als research, raise money, donation, donations, challenge, social media, fundraiser, fundraisers, cold, frozen, penguin, penguins, arctic, cold water challenge, polar plunge, charity, charities"You're right, sir—it is cute. But the last time we let one of these things in the entire kingdom was overrun with ticks, mites, and fleas."
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ancient, history, troy, trojan, trojan horse, greek, greece, horse, horses, dog, dogs, animal, animals, trick, tricks, castle, castles, kingdom, kingdoms, guard, guards, gate, gates, cute, tick, ticks, mite, mites, flea, fleas, disease, diseases, puppy, puppies, stray, strays, stray dog, stray dogs, homeless, carrier, carriers, hiding, hidden, overrun, trojan dog, dangerous, risky, risk, danger, dangers, unsafe"Well, don't just stand there looking precancerous."
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sunbathers, sunbathing, sunbath, beach, beaches, seaside, vacation, vacations, holiday, holidays, skin cancer, skin cancers, cancer, cancers, cancerous, disease, diseases, dermatologist, dermatologists, dermatology, beach chair, beach chairs, unhelpful, wife, wives, husband, husbands, nag, nags, nagging, sun cream, suncream, sun-creamJohn W. Wilson 1949-2009 - Forgot to ask his doctor everything he wanted to ask him.
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doctor, doctors, checkup, checkups, check-up, check-ups, forget, forgets, forgetting, forgot, forgotten, absentminded, absentmindedness, absent-minded, absent-mindedness, disease, diseases, diseased, tombstone, tombstones, epitaph, epitaphs, headstone, headstones, fatal error, fatal errors, fatal mistake, fatal mistakes, hypochondriac, hypochondriacs, hypochondria, worry, worries, worrying, worrier, worriers, illness, illnesses, gravestone, gravestones, cause of death, diagnosis, prognosis, concern, concerns, concernedAlternative illnesses for alternative medicine.
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alternative medicine, holistic medicine, medical, medicine, doctor, doctors, patient, patients, health, health care, healthcare, illness, ill, sick, sickness, disease, diseases, karma, aura, auras, past-life, past-lives, reincarnation, crystal, crystals, healing, cure, cures, pseudoscience, superstition, superstitious, unscientific"I'll be O.K. It's just some damn virus I picked up from a computer."
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technology, machine, machines, robot, robots, computer, computers, virus, viruses, computer virus, computer viruses, germ, germs, sick, sickness, ill, illness, disease, diseases, medical, medicine, cold, colds, flu, influenza, problem, problems, it, i.t., information technology, modern problems, modern life"I'm afraid you've had a paradigm shift."
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paradigm, paradigms, paradigm shift, paradigm shifts, diagnosis, diagnoses, diagnose, jargon, business jargon, business speak, checkup, checkups, check-up, check-ups, doctor, doctors, doctor's office, doctors office, physician, physicians, gobbledegook, disease, diseases, rare disease, rare diseases, illness, illnesses"There's a cure—but it's light-years away."
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alien, aliens, time, time travel, science fiction, sci fi, scifi, sci-fi, science-fiction, doctor, doctors, cure, cures, medical, medicals, surgery, surgeon, ill, illness, illnesses, patient, patients, get well, get well soon, terminal, disease, diseases, diseased, health, healthy, healthcare, health care, medicare, medi care, obamacare, obama care, doctor doctor"There's a cure—but it's light-years away."
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alien, aliens, time, time travel, science fiction, sci fi, scifi, sci-fi, science-fiction, doctor, doctors, cure, cures, medical, medicals, surgery, surgeon, ill, illness, illnesses, patient, patients, get well, get well soon, terminal, disease, diseases, diseased, health, healthy, healthcare, health care, medicare, medi care, obamacare, obama care, doctor doctor"I know we're not dating anymore, but I thought you should know I have termites."
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date, dates, dating, stds, sexually transmitted diseases, girlfriends, ex, exes, ex-girlfriend, ex-girlfriends, sti, stis, sexually transmitted infections, notify, notifies, notifying, former partner, former partners, puppet, puppets, contagious, test, tests, testing, tested, illness, illnesses, disease, diseases, termite, termites, wooden, wood"Are there any reports of illness at this table?"
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restaurant, restaurants, dining out, eating out, meal, meals, food, eating, dining, waiter, waiters, server, servers, service, customer service, illness, ill, sick, sickness, disease, diseases, hazmat suit, hazmat suits, hazardous, dangerous, risky, report, reports, reporting, food poisoning, hygiene, unhygienic, food-borne illness, health inspector, health inspectors, health inspection, health inspections, decontamination suit, decontamination suits, hazardous materials suit, hazardous materials suits, public health, public health and safety, medical, medicine, centers for disease control and prevention, cdc, c.d.c., bad date, bad dates, date, dates, couple, couples"The guy with the weird skin disease forgot to sign the privacy forms."
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hospital, hospitals, clinic, clinics, doctor's office, doctor's office, medical, medicine, doctor, doctors, patient, patients, health, health care, healthcare, receptionist, receptionists, secretary, secretaries, nurse, privacy, personal privacy, disease, diseases, skin, skin disease, form, forms, document, documents, sign, signature, signatures, confidentiality, patient confidentiality, anonymity, health insurance portability and accountability act, hippa, h.i.p.p.a., data privacy, medical information, breach, announcement, announcements, embarrassing, humiliating"But I've got to move fast—I'm only a twenty-four-hour virus."
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relationship, relationships, relationship issues, relationship problems, date, dates, dating, moving, fast, quick, germ, germs, virus, viruses, science, biology, twenty-four hours, 24 hours, sick, sickness, ill, illness, disease, diseases, flu, cold, colds, influenza, limited time, medicine, medical, doctor, doctors, virology, virologist, virologists, cdc, center for disease contol and prevention