Doctors Cartoons

"It's a baby. Federal regulations prohibit our mentioning its race, age, or gender."

"I'll be performing the operation, and this is the anesthesiologist."

Fertility Clinic

"We medical practitioners do our very best, Mr. Nyman. Nothing is more sacred to us than the doctor-plaintiff relationship."

"We're borrowing the best features of the Canadian system."

"The machine's done something really weird to Mr. Hendrickson."

"I don't think you're getting enough stress."

"Looking good!"

"Fortunately treatment will be relatively inexpensive since you have the generic form of the disease!"

"Please, honey, I'm with a patient, and I've asked you not to call me on this line."

"What's the next best medicine?"

"Science is baffled. I hope you're happy."

"My question is for the medical examiner."

"Worse."

"The ringing in your ears-I think I can help."

"Uh-oh, your coverage doesn't seem to include illness."

"Well, Bob, it looks like a paper cut, but just to be sure let's do lots of tests."

"There will be a bit of a wait while we figure out a market solution to your problem."

"This patient has a rare form of medical insurance."

"Some guys from the state board of medicine are here to see you."

"You should relax less."

"Will I still be able to not exercise?"

"You should just feel a tiny prick, and then a lifetime of morphine addiction."

"Certainly. A party of four at seven-thirty in the name of Dr. Jennings. May I ask whether that is an actual medical degree or a Ph.D.?"

"All these years, and you haven't listened to a damn thing I've said, have you?"