"It's not enough that we succeed. Cats must also fail."
"We'll double our chances of recovery if we buy two lottery tickets."
Tags:recovery, economic recovery, chance, chances, lotto ticket, lotto tickets, lottery ticket, lottery tickets, fail, fails, failure, failures, failing business, failing businesses, profit, profits, falling profit, falling profits, demand, shrinking market, shrinking markets, demand curve, lower, lowers, lowering, lowered
Tags:surprise, surprises, bad news, ugly surprise, ugly surprises, pregnancy, fail, fails, failing, failure, failures, cancer, malignant, malignancy, divorce, divorces, surprise party, surprise parties, birthday party, birthday parties, flunk, flunks, fired, firing, firings, unexpected, news, shock, shocks, shocking, surprising, unfortunate
"On the other hand, we've had a lot of wonderful years in the tourist business."
All of my hopes and dreams, crushed, served on a bun.
Tags:hot dog, hot dogs, hot dog stand, hot dog stands, vendor, vendors, street vendor, street vendors, working class, working classes, hopes and dreams, crushed, crushing, street cart, street carts, dirty water hot dog, dirty water hot dogs, ambition, ambitions, ambitious, ambitiousness, fail, fails, failure, failures
Ed's Restaurant - Closed. Get Over It
Tags:sign, signs, signage, door sign, closure, closed, close, fails, fail, failed, failure, failures, bankrupt, bankruptcy, economy, economic, recession, small business, small businesses, dining, diner, diners, restaurants, restaurant, shut down, shut-down, shutdown, food, eating, eatery, cafe, rude, rudeness, frank, frankness, brusque, school of hard knocks, hard knocks, service, service industry, catering
The Adventures Of Normalman
Tags:superhero, superheroes, super hero, super heroes, hero, heroes, heroic, heroically, adventure, adventures, adventured, fall, falling, falls, fail, failed, fly, flies, flying, normal, average, everyday, every-day, normal, failed, failure, failures, normality, fail, fails, banal, bored, boring, unusual, play on words, word play, word-play, underwhelmed, underwhelming, realism, realistic, slapstick, slap stick, prat fall, prat-fall
"What did you expect from a failing educational system?"
Tags:educational system, education system, educational systems, education system, educational reform, education reforms, educational reforms, school, schools, school report, school reports, report card, report cards, grade, grades, grading, fail, fails, blame game, blame games, blame-game, blame-games
Flopsy wakes up one day and suddenly realizes why she never succeeded at anything.
Tags:flopsy, rabbit, rabbits, easter, easter bunny, easter bunnies, name, names, namesake, namesakes, flop, flops, flopping, what's in a name, whats in a name, succeed, succeeds, succeeding, success, unsuccessful, blame, blames, blaming, blame game, blame games, fate, fated, failure, failures, fail, fails, failing, career, careers, career arc, career arcs
"If you fail one Rorschach test, you've failed them all."
"O.K., I'll explain it one more time. Sometimes even very successful careers come to an end, and you have to teach the things you were once paid to do in order to make rent."
Tags:career, careers, career change, career changes, career day, career days, presentation, presentations, fail, fails, failure, failures, downgrade, downgrades, downgrading, wage, wages, cartoons, cartoon character, cartoon characters, superhero, superheroes, comic, comics, comic book, comic books, rent, make rent, makes rent, making rent, celebrity, b-list, c-list
"Can I buy you a drink? And then if things don't work out between us you can pay me back?"
Tags:bar, bars, pub, pubs, patron, patrons, customer, customers, drink, drinks, drinking, drinking alcohol, alcohol, alcoholic, liquor, booze, pick-up line, pickup line, pickup lines, pick up line, pick up lines, picking up, relationship, relationships, relationship issues, relationship problems, dating, date, dates, fail, fails, failure, split, splits, separation, separations, breakup, breakups, break up, break ups, break-up, break-ups, pay back, return, money, cheap, frugal, stingy, cheapskate, cheapskates
"She's inconsolable since Mizrahi went belly-up."
Tags:inconsolable, belly up, goes belly up, going belly up, middle age, failure, failures, fail, fails, failing, house coat, house coats, worry, worries, worrying, fashion designer, fashion designers, fashion design, fashion designs, designer label, designer labels, going out of business, goes out of business
"My life is a powerful blast tocenter field easily snagged on the warning track."
Tags:baseball, metaphor, metaphors, metaphorical, psychologist, psychologists, psychology, fly out, flies out, flying out, pop fly, pop flies, base hit, base hits, therapy, therapist, therapists, occupational therapy, pro athlete, pro athletes, fail, fails, failure, failures, failing, batter, batters, batting, base hit, base hits, anxiety, anxieties, anxious, anxiousness, mental health, mental health problem, mental health problems
"I've always been an outsider, but I never achieved the status of a pariah."
Tags:pariah, pariahs, outsider, outsiders, social status, social statuses, social pariah, social pariahs, psychological problem, psychological problems, underachiever, underachievers, underachieving, depression, depressed, depressing, lament, laments, lamenting, lamentation, complain, complains, complaining, bartender, bartenders, bartenders, regret, regrets, regretting, regretful, achievement, achievements, achiever, achievers, doer, doers, failure, failures, fail, fails, failing
"This is an unfortunate time to run aground."
"I made a bid for the Senate, but this is as far as I got."
Tags:senate, senate bid, senate bids, senator, senators, diner, diners, visit diners, visiting diners, greasy spoon, greasy spoons, man of the people, men of the people, working class, working classes, outreach, tin cup, tin cups, candidate, candidates, campaign, campaigns, campaigning, cliche, cliches, fail, fails, failure, failures, politician, politicians, political campaign, political campaigns, beggar, beggars, begging, panhandle, panhandles, panhandler, panhandlers, barfly, barflies, has-been, never-was, cliche, cliches
Dept. of Lost Causes
Tags:lost cause, lost causes, southerner, southerners, confederate statue, confederate statues, statue, statues, confederacy, confederated states, csa, confederated states of america, fail, fails, failure, failures, famous failure, famous failures, monument, monuments, reflecting pool, reflecting pools, defeat, defeats, southerner, southerners, south, shrine, shrines
Maintenance Fee Party
"But, seriously folks…."
Tags:comic, comics, standup, standups, stand-up, stand-ups, comedian, comedians, comedy night, comedy nights, bomb, bombs, bombing, fail, fails, failing, failure, failures, tough crowd, tough crowds, audience, audiences, tough audience, tough audiences, but seriously folks, bored, unamused, amusement, amusing, laugh, laughs, laughing, laughter, funny man, funny person, funny people, funny men
Stan Mack's Real Life Funnies: Alumnae News
Tags:alum, alums, alumni, alumnae, chance encounter, chance encounters, old friend, old friends, college friend, college friends, art school, art schools, visual arts, visual arts major, visual arts majors, faux pas, cringe, cringes, cringing, awkward, awkward scenario, awkward scenarios, awkward scene, awkward scenes, copywriter, copywriters, writing copy, copy, advertising agency, advertising agencies, career, careers, success, successes, successful, compare, compares, comparing, comparison, comparisons, waitress, waitresses, fail, fails, failing, failure, failures
"I guess someone else with three wishes is wishing your three wishes don't come true."
"Charlie, it's us, your teammates. We're here to help you. The other team's getting an awful lot of hits and we're worried."
Tags:worry, worries, worrying, worrier, worriers, pitcher, pitchers, pitching, baseball, baseball player, baseball players, meeting on the mound, meetings on the mound, intervention, interventions, intervene, intervenes, intervening, fail, fails, failing, failure, failures, bad day, bad days, rough day, rough days, rub it in, rubs it in, rubbing it in, mistake, mistakes, accident, accidents, embarrass, embarrasses, embarrassing, humiliate, humiliates, humiliating, alcoholic, alcoholics, alcoholism
"I hope you've been keeping your eye on the red king, Brotsky. Pick it and that raise is yours; fail and you're out on your ear."
Tags:three card monty, raise, raises, pay raise, pay raises, pay rise, pay rises, fail, fails, failure, failures, rigged, rigged game, rigged games, manager, managers, boss, bosses, hierarchy, hierarchies, corporate hierarchy, corporate hierarchies, gamble, gambles, gambling, gambler, gamblers, attentive, attentiveness, test, tests, game of chance, games of chance, game of skill, games of skills, swindle, swindles, swindling, con, cons, con artist, con artists
"At the end of the day, I always feel I could have shifted more blame."
Tags:company, companies, corporate, corporation, corporations, fail, fails, failed, failing, bad news, boss, bosses, blame, blames, blaming, employee, employees, shift, shifts, shifting, shift the blame, bad performance, bad performances, team, teams, section, sections, area, areas, at the end of the day, consider, considers, considering, in trouble, despair, despairs, despairing