"Sorry folks-it's not what you ordered, but everyone is getting fettucine until we fix the computer."
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restaurant, restaurants, eating out, dining out, meal, meals, food, eating, dining, waiter, waiters, server, servers, service, customer service, pasta, fettuccine, order, orders, ordering, pos system, pos systems, point of sale, system, systems, system failure, problem, problems, computer, computers, issue, issues, cooking, serving, kitchen, kitchens, chef, chefs, failure, failures, modern life, restaurant problems, restaurant issues, technology"It's not enough that we succeed. Cats must also fail."
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cat, cats, dog, dogs, enemy, enemies, natural enemies, success, successes, vindictive, vindictiveness, petty, pettiness, revenge, avenge, get revenge, getting revenge, schadenfreude, fail, fails, failure, failures, zero sum, zero sum game, zero sum games"Well, I have to tell your publisher something."
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writer, writers, author, authors, novelist, novelists, balloon, balloon, deflated, deflation, deflated balloon, deflated balloons, publish, publishers, fail, failed, failing, writers block, writer's block, uninspired, inspiration, depressed, depression, depressive, depressives, failure, failures, let down, let downs, let-down, let-downs"Don't think of it as getting fired. Think of it as finally being recognized for your incompetence."
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incompetence, incompetent, fired, laid off, let go, made redundant, redundant, redundancy, unemployed, unemployment, lost job, boss, bosses, manager, managers, management, hiring manager, hiring managers, outsource, outsourcing, outsourced, recognition, fail, failure, failed, failing, bad employee, employee, employees, ex employee, ex employees, employer, employers, making cuts, budget cuts, office, offices"Once, years ago, I gave a sucker an even break, but it didn't work out."
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business, businessman, businessmen, boss, bosses, executive, executives, exec, execs, manager, managers, management, sucker, suckers, chance, chances, opportunity, opportunities, failure, failed, social status, elite, elites"We'll double our chances of recovery if we buy two lottery tickets."
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recovery, economic recovery, chance, chances, lotto ticket, lotto tickets, lottery ticket, lottery tickets, fail, fails, failure, failures, failing business, failing businesses, profit, profits, falling profit, falling profits, demand, shrinking market, shrinking markets, demand curve, lower, lowers, lowering, loweredSurprise Party
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surprise, surprises, bad news, ugly surprise, ugly surprises, pregnancy, fail, fails, failing, failure, failures, cancer, malignant, malignancy, divorce, divorces, surprise party, surprise parties, birthday party, birthday parties, flunk, flunks, fired, firing, firings, unexpected, news, shock, shocks, shocking, surprising, unfortunate"On the other hand, we've had a lot of wonderful years in the tourist business."
"An interesting selection, Dad, yet essentially a failure-as you can see, I'm still awake."
"Do you think we're a storybook romance transformed into a textbook case?"
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relationship, relationships, love, marriage, marriages, married life, couple, couples, husband, husbands, wife, wives, spouse, spouses, storybook, storybooks, storybook romance, storybook romances, textbook case, textbooks cases, boring, dull, unexciting, stale, stagnant, stable, stability, romance, unromantic, lack of romance, lacking romance, middle age, middle-age, middle aged, middle-aged, aging, ageing, growing old, growing older, getting older, getting old, growing old, stages of a relationship, transformed, changed, change, transformation, transformations, changes, psychology, failure, failures, writing, book, books, literatureFailures.
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failing, failure, failures, pavlov, experiment, experiments, behavior, behaviour, classical conditioning, conditioning, animal, animals, pet, pets, cat, cats, bird, birds, plant, plants, houseplant, houseplantsAll of my hopes and dreams, crushed, served on a bun.
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hot dog, hot dogs, hot dog stand, hot dog stands, vendor, vendors, street vendor, street vendors, working class, working classes, hopes and dreams, crushed, crushing, street cart, street carts, dirty water hot dog, dirty water hot dogs, ambition, ambitions, ambitious, ambitiousness, fail, fails, failure, failuresEd's Restaurant - Closed. Get Over It
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sign, signs, signage, door sign, closure, closed, close, fails, fail, failed, failure, failures, bankrupt, bankruptcy, economy, economic, recession, small business, small businesses, dining, diner, diners, restaurants, restaurant, shut down, shut-down, shutdown, food, eating, eatery, cafe, rude, rudeness, frank, frankness, brusque, school of hard knocks, hard knocks, service, service industry, catering"Mr. Saltee"
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desert, deserts, warm, sun, sunny, desserts, dessert, food, ice cream van, ice cream vans, ice cream truck, ice cream truck, van, vans, truck, trucks, dead, death, skeleton, skeletons, salt, salt shaker, salt cellar, salt shakers, salt cellars, thirst, thirsty, bad business ideas, bad ideas, bad idea, bad business idea, doomed to fail, failure, fail"I thought he was a genius, but now I find out that he was self-proclaimed."
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executive, executives, business, businessmen, businessman, businesses, office, offices, corporate, corporations, corporation, work, workers, working, working world, market, marketing, markets, profit, profit boost, profits, profitable, profitability, train, training, trained, trainer, genius, geniuses, resume, resumes, ego, egotist, egotistical, failure, failed, failures, recoup, recouping, trust, trusting, trustworthy, reliable, rely, relying, running away, run away, runawayStill hemorrhaging; NBC cancels "The Cheeseheads"
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cheesehead, cheeseheads, cheese, cheese, entertainment, entertain, entertaining, cancel, cancelled, cancelling, tv, tvs, television, televisions, tv show, tv shows, television show, television shows, fail, failed, failure, failures, food, foods, family, families"Oh, by the way, as you were on your way down here your lottery ticket won seventeen million dollars."
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hell, welcome to hell, devil, devils, demon, demons, satan, fire, flame, flames, new arrival, death, dead, money, gambling, gambler, gamblers, lottery, lotteries, playing the lottery, lottery ticket, lottery tickets, game, games, won, winning the lottery, million, millions, million dollars, fortune, unlucky, lucky, fortunate, unfortunate, good luck, bad luck, bad day, worst day, rich, wealth, wealthy, riches, poor, man, men, psychology, failure, failed, stress, stressful, unfulfilled dreamsGodzilla vs. The Angry Movie Executives
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kaiju, kaijus, monster, monsters, giant monster, giant monsters, battles, talking animal, talking animals, actor, actors, big budget, budget, exec, executive, executives, movie, movies, film, films, cinema, cinemas, box office, flop, box office flop, box-office, entertainment, failure, failed, battle, battled, argue, argued, antagonise, antagonise, threaten, threatened, versus, vs, anthro, anthropomorphic, anthropomorphism, hollywood, director, directors, producer, producers, sales, profit, profits, overwhelm, overwhelmed, gang up, ganged up"After the judicial system, I'm my own harshest critic."
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jail, jails, prison, prisons, incarceration, behind bars, imprisoned, prisoner, prisoners, inmate, inmates, convict, convicts, criminal, criminals, crime, punishments, jail cell, jail cells, prison cell, prison cells, cell, cells, cellmate, cellmates, celly, cellie, cellies, legal system, justice system, judicial system, harshest critic, harshest critics, self-criticism, critic, critics, critical, criticism, criticising, criticizing, failure, failures, ego, insecure, insecurity, insecurities, self-esteem, self-confidence, ego, moral relativism, moral judgement, moral judgements, judgement, judgements, psychology, mental health"I was great in high school."
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let down, let downs, let-down, let-downs, life choices, career choices, failure, failures, high hopes, ambition, ambitions, offices, office job, office jobs, office work, job satisfaction, bad job, bad jobs, disappointment, disappointments, office worker, office workers, midlife crisis, unhappy, depression, old, older, old age, ageing, aging, not young anymore, age, high school, memories, memory, nostalgia, nostalgic, career, careers, work, job, life, expectation, expectations"I hope, Reinhardt, that you're not one of those people whose sense of self-worth is defined by their job."
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office worker, office workers, office work, office job, office jobs, job satisfaction, overworked, overwork, overworking, workaholic, workaholics, workaholism, self worth, self-worth, self-esteem, cubism, abstract art, failure, failures, failing, work life balance, work-life balance, criticise, criticising, disapprove, disapproving"Yeah? Well, tell him that in this company Gandhi-like resistance wouldn't have worked for Gandhi, either."
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business, businessman, businessmen, boss, bosses, executive, executives, exec, execs, manager, managers, management, office, offices, office life, employee, employees, worker, workers, resisting, resistance, activist, activists, activism, non-violent, nonviolent, peaceful, protest, protests, protesting, civil disobedience, union, unions, strike, strikes, striking, floppy, failing, failure, failed"I'm a wunderkind slash flop."
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wunderkind, wunderkinds, child prodigy, child prodigies, fail, failed, failure, failures, party, parties, introduction, introductions, success, successful, genius, geniuses, children, child, kid, kids, smart, intelligent, flop, flops, psychology