"Sorry folks-it's not what you ordered, but everyone is getting fettucine until we fix the computer."
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restaurant, restaurants, eating out, dining out, meal, meals, food, eating, dining, waiter, waiters, server, servers, service, customer service, pasta, fettuccine, order, orders, ordering, pos system, pos systems, point of sale, system, systems, system failure, problem, problems, computer, computers, issue, issues, cooking, serving, kitchen, kitchens, chef, chefs, failure, failures, modern life, restaurant problems, restaurant issues, technology"It's not enough that we succeed. Cats must also fail."
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cat, cats, dog, dogs, enemy, enemies, natural enemies, success, successes, vindictive, vindictiveness, petty, pettiness, revenge, avenge, get revenge, getting revenge, schadenfreude, fail, fails, failure, failures, zero sum, zero sum game, zero sum games"Well, I have to tell your publisher something."
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writer, writers, author, authors, novelist, novelists, balloon, balloon, deflated, deflation, deflated balloon, deflated balloons, publish, publishers, fail, failed, failing, writers block, writer's block, uninspired, inspiration, depressed, depression, depressive, depressives, failure, failures, let down, let downs, let-down, let-downs"We'll double our chances of recovery if we buy two lottery tickets."
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recovery, economic recovery, chance, chances, lotto ticket, lotto tickets, lottery ticket, lottery tickets, fail, fails, failure, failures, failing business, failing businesses, profit, profits, falling profit, falling profits, demand, shrinking market, shrinking markets, demand curve, lower, lowers, lowering, loweredSurprise Party
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surprise, surprises, bad news, ugly surprise, ugly surprises, pregnancy, fail, fails, failing, failure, failures, cancer, malignant, malignancy, divorce, divorces, surprise party, surprise parties, birthday party, birthday parties, flunk, flunks, fired, firing, firings, unexpected, news, shock, shocks, shocking, surprising, unfortunate"On the other hand, we've had a lot of wonderful years in the tourist business."
"An interesting selection, Dad, yet essentially a failure-as you can see, I'm still awake."
"Do you think we're a storybook romance transformed into a textbook case?"
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relationship, relationships, love, marriage, marriages, married life, couple, couples, husband, husbands, wife, wives, spouse, spouses, storybook, storybooks, storybook romance, storybook romances, textbook case, textbooks cases, boring, dull, unexciting, stale, stagnant, stable, stability, romance, unromantic, lack of romance, lacking romance, middle age, middle-age, middle aged, middle-aged, aging, ageing, growing old, growing older, getting older, getting old, growing old, stages of a relationship, transformed, changed, change, transformation, transformations, changes, psychology, failure, failures, writing, book, books, literatureFailures.
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failing, failure, failures, pavlov, experiment, experiments, behavior, behaviour, classical conditioning, conditioning, animal, animals, pet, pets, cat, cats, bird, birds, plant, plants, houseplant, houseplantsAll of my hopes and dreams, crushed, served on a bun.
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hot dog, hot dogs, hot dog stand, hot dog stands, vendor, vendors, street vendor, street vendors, working class, working classes, hopes and dreams, crushed, crushing, street cart, street carts, dirty water hot dog, dirty water hot dogs, ambition, ambitions, ambitious, ambitiousness, fail, fails, failure, failuresEd's Restaurant - Closed. Get Over It
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sign, signs, signage, door sign, closure, closed, close, fails, fail, failed, failure, failures, bankrupt, bankruptcy, economy, economic, recession, small business, small businesses, dining, diner, diners, restaurants, restaurant, shut down, shut-down, shutdown, food, eating, eatery, cafe, rude, rudeness, frank, frankness, brusque, school of hard knocks, hard knocks, service, service industry, catering"I thought he was a genius, but now I find out that he was self-proclaimed."
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executive, executives, business, businessmen, businessman, businesses, office, offices, corporate, corporations, corporation, work, workers, working, working world, market, marketing, markets, profit, profit boost, profits, profitable, profitability, train, training, trained, trainer, genius, geniuses, resume, resumes, ego, egotist, egotistical, failure, failed, failures, recoup, recouping, trust, trusting, trustworthy, reliable, rely, relying, running away, run away, runawayStill hemorrhaging; NBC cancels "The Cheeseheads"
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cheesehead, cheeseheads, cheese, cheese, entertainment, entertain, entertaining, cancel, cancelled, cancelling, tv, tvs, television, televisions, tv show, tv shows, television show, television shows, fail, failed, failure, failures, food, foods, family, families"After the judicial system, I'm my own harshest critic."
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jail, jails, prison, prisons, incarceration, behind bars, imprisoned, prisoner, prisoners, inmate, inmates, convict, convicts, criminal, criminals, crime, punishments, jail cell, jail cells, prison cell, prison cells, cell, cells, cellmate, cellmates, celly, cellie, cellies, legal system, justice system, judicial system, harshest critic, harshest critics, self-criticism, critic, critics, critical, criticism, criticising, criticizing, failure, failures, ego, insecure, insecurity, insecurities, self-esteem, self-confidence, ego, moral relativism, moral judgement, moral judgements, judgement, judgements, psychology, mental health"I was great in high school."
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let down, let downs, let-down, let-downs, life choices, career choices, failure, failures, high hopes, ambition, ambitions, offices, office job, office jobs, office work, job satisfaction, bad job, bad jobs, disappointment, disappointments, office worker, office workers, midlife crisis, unhappy, depression, old, older, old age, ageing, aging, not young anymore, age, high school, memories, memory, nostalgia, nostalgic, career, careers, work, job, life, expectation, expectations"I hope, Reinhardt, that you're not one of those people whose sense of self-worth is defined by their job."
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office worker, office workers, office work, office job, office jobs, job satisfaction, overworked, overwork, overworking, workaholic, workaholics, workaholism, self worth, self-worth, self-esteem, cubism, abstract art, failure, failures, failing, work life balance, work-life balance, criticise, criticising, disapprove, disapproving"I'm a wunderkind slash flop."
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wunderkind, wunderkinds, child prodigy, child prodigies, fail, failed, failure, failures, party, parties, introduction, introductions, success, successful, genius, geniuses, children, child, kid, kids, smart, intelligent, flop, flops, psychologyPlaypen escape hatch.
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toddler, toddlers, infant, infants, prison, prisons, prisoner, prisoners, escape, escapes, escape hatch, escape hatches, trapdoor, trapdoors, playpen, playpens, terrible twos, terrible 2s, parent, parents, parenting, parenthood, growing up, child rearing, kid, kids, child, failed, failure, failures, escape attempt, escape attemptsSign over one of three teller lines at a bank reads "Reassurances"
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bank, banks, banking, bank teller, bank tellers, teller, tellers, cashier, cashiers, customer service, money, finances, withdrawals, deposits, reassurances, line, lines, queue, queues, lineup, lineups, line up, line ups, lining, queuing, sign, signs, signage, bankruptcy, bankruptcies, economy, economic troubles, economic problems, recession, bank failure, bank failures, insolvency, financial institution, financial institutions, financial crisis, failure, failures, too big to fail, banking crisis"We planned to go out for a birthday dinner, but he's decided he'd rather celebrate by staying home and obsessing about what he's failed to accomplish over the past forty years."
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middle-age, middle age, middle-aged, middle aged, mid-life crisis, midlife crisis, turning 40, over the hill, over-the hill, aging, ageing, growing old, growing older, getting old, getting older, birthday, birthdays, celebrating, celebration, celebrations, depressed, depression, regret, regrets, obsessing, brooding, failure, failures, staying in, staying home, birthday dinner, birthday dinners, disappointment, bitter, lamenting, psychology, mental health"I'm working on Plan B."
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plan b, plan bs, backup plan, backup plans, ambition, ambitions, ambitious, dream, dreams, dreaming big, goal, goals, big dream, big dreams, slum, slums, broken dream, broken dreams, backups, failure, failures, husband, husbands, wife, wives, poverty, career, careers, fortune, fortunes, persevere, perseverance, persevering"Dumb it up."
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writer, writers, publications, publication, publisher, publishers, editor, editors, insult, insulting, insulted, dumb it down, dumbing it down, dumbed down, incompetent, incompetence, agent, agents, bad writer, bad writers, proof, proofs, proof reading, proof reader, proof readers, book, books, unintelligent, manuscript, manuscripts, notes, getting notes, failed, failing, failures, failure"If I've accomplished little, it's because I have giants standing on my shoulders."
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standing on the shoulders of giants, expression, expressions, saying, sayings, idiom, idioms, excuse, excuses, making excuses, bad excuse, bad excuses, life choices, career choices, accomplishments, achievement, achievements, accomplishment, failure, failures, failing, let down, let downs, let-down, let-downsThe Adventures Of Normalman
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superhero, superheroes, super hero, super heroes, hero, heroes, heroic, heroically, adventure, adventures, adventured, fall, falling, falls, fail, failed, fly, flies, flying, normal, average, everyday, every-day, normal, failed, failure, failures, normality, fail, fails, banal, bored, boring, unusual, play on words, word play, word-play, underwhelmed, underwhelming, realism, realistic, slapstick, slap stick, prat fall, prat-fallFlopsy wakes up one day and suddenly realizes why she never succeeded at anything.
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flopsy, rabbit, rabbits, easter, easter bunny, easter bunnies, name, names, namesake, namesakes, flop, flops, flopping, what's in a name, whats in a name, succeed, succeeds, succeeding, success, unsuccessful, blame, blames, blaming, blame game, blame games, fate, fated, failure, failures, fail, fails, failing, career, careers, career arc, career arcs