Fiction Cartoons

"Now that I've wiped him out, I kind of miss the little peg-legged b******."

"Sure, we need more research in alchemy, necromancy, and sorcery, but where is the money going to come from?"

Unexpected Help for the Colonists at the Boston Tea Party

"'A writer?' she gasped, her perky breasts heaving. 'God I love writers!'"

"I beg your pardon," said Alice, "but which of you is the Democrat?"

"I've never written anything, but I think I have a good ear for dialogue."

"I should like to buy a handgun while it is still legal," said Alice very gently.

"Come on, honey, enough with the magic realism."

"Always the last place you look."

Finally - a software package that makes it snap to write that novel.

James Bond: The Cutback Years

"I'd just like to congratulate you on how skillfully you've hidden my novel!"

"They've remained remarkably faithful to the text."

"My team of advisers is so fantastic it's unbelievable."

Where the Wild Things Were

Just Arrived: Tom Clancy toiletries.

Chinese New Year

"Then the demons that drove me to Tangier to try to write fiction turned around and drove me to the Napa Valley to make wine."

"You know, of course, I'm going to have to swallow you whole."

"This Fall on NBC: Fish Out of Water"

"It's the super - he says a lot of short American fiction has been clogging the pipes in the basement."

"The studio's asked me to see if I can dumb down some Danielle Steel."

"Huh. In my memory he was a lot bigger."

The Da Vinci Code Bookstore.

"If it's all right, I prefer the name Dave."