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"I want to make my mark on the world—and have it disappear in ten seconds."
"If it's any consolation, the video went viral."
"The only way to create a sensation as an essayist these days is to write something mean bout cats."
"My appointment starting on time just went viral."
"If it's any help, your sentence was the most e-mailed story of the week."
Florida Man Strikes Again
"Sorry, Mom - that clip of you and the squirrel got a lot of views."
"The cool thing about this flu strain is that it's trending right now."
"Now get out there and do something fans can turn into a meme!"