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"Take the severance package, Hayward. The rest of the board wanted a ritual slaying."
"Hold it - we almost forgot his benefits package."
"When examining these new contracts, gentlemen, please note that in Paragraph 48 the word 'golden' has been replaced by 'plywood' and 'parachute' is now 'toboggan.'"
"We can't offer you a golden parachute, however we do offer a very attractive escape hatch."
"I'd be upset, too, if they replaced my golden parachute with a dirty rolled-up carpet."
"We can't offer you a golden parachute, however we do provide a very attractive escape hatch."