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"There I go again, telling stories that make you an accessory after the fact."
"The country grandpa came from was a stinking hellhole of unspeakable poverty where everyone was always happy."
"And this little poet cried ennui, ennui, ennui all the way home."
"Mr. Culner is survived by his wife, the former Janice Dexter; one son, Horace, Jr.; and three grandchildren."
"So that's what happened to little June Marie!"
Ask me about my...Estranged Grandchildren.
"Thirty-five years ago your grammy was at a crossroads, ... and she saw your grandfather hitchhiking."
"The truth is, Kevin, a long time ago your grandfather hit a triple and thats how we got to third base."
"Grammy was Shabby when Shabby wasn't chic."
Waiting For Godot
"Grandmother was telling me that when she was young, a girl got out and walked on such occasions, but then they always did everything the hard way."