"I'm afraid you're retaining lawyers."
"Of course, it's a highly experimental procedure, but we're trying out new techniques from other disciplines all the time."
Tags:procedure, procedures, medical procedure, medical procedures, surgery, surgeries, surgeon, surgeons, experiment, experiments, experimental, medication, medications, gas, gasoline, petrol, pump, pumps, fill her up, fill 'er up, service station, service stations, petrol station, petrol stations, trial, trials, trial clinic, trial clinics, technique, techniques, new technique, new techniques, hospital bed, hospital beds, hospitalized, hospitalization
"This patient has a rare form of medical insurance."
Tags:health insurance, insurance, insurances, health plan, health plans, healthcare plan, healthcare plans, health-care, healthcare coverage, health-care cover, health-care coverage, health care cover, healthcare cover, doctor, doctors, medical, medicine, diagnosis, diagnose, medicaid, hospital, hospitals, hospital bed, priority, priorities
"I'll have someone come in and prep you for the bill."
Tags:doctor, doctors, surgery, surgeries, expense, expenses, medical expense, medical expenses, prep, preps, prepare, prepares, preparing, medical bill, medical bills, billing, hospital, hospitals, hospitalization, hospital bed, hospital beds, debt, debts, co-pay, co-pays, co-payment, payment, payments, obamacare, aca, affordable care act, repeal, repeals, repealing
"Good news, Mrs. Bryant - I think we got it all."
Tags:rollerskate, rollerskates, rollerskating, rollerblade, rollerblades, roller-blades, roller-skate, roller-skates, injury, injuries, sport injury, sports injury, sports injuries, sport injuries, broken leg, broken legs, broken bone, broken bones, traction, pulley, pulleys, hospital, hospitals, hospital bed, hospital beds
"It's a medical miracle that you made it through that last medical miracle."
Tags:medicine, medical, doctor, miracle, medical miracle, reassuring, not reassuring, danger, dangerous, medicine, doctor, doctors, hospital, hospitals, hospital bed, treatment, treatments, miracles, medical miracles, made it through, survive, surviving, diagnosis, diagnoses, patient, patients, unusual
"Don't worry, boss—we whacked your skis."
Tags:mob, mobs, mobster, mobsters, mafia, mafias, mafioso, russian mob, russian mafia, wolves, wolf, crimes, criminal, criminals, law, laws, organised crime, organised crimes, cronies, goon, goons, henchmen, henchman, thug, thugs, whack, whacked, lingo, slang, skiing, ski, skis, accident, accidents, make it look like an accident, injury, injured, hospital bed, hospital, sick bed, play on words, word play, word-play, idiot, idiots, dumb, dumber, stupid, stupidity
Good News, Bad News - Save the Leg.
Tags:get well soon, health, sick, hospital, hospital bed, doctor, ill, patient, leg, legs, bad, doctor, malpractice, good news, bad news, glass half full, optimism, optimistic, positive spin, positive outlook, sick leave, sick days, quack, nurse, medicine, medical, health care, chop, chop, limb, good news and bad news, amputated, disabled
"I'd like some Ketamine for my appetizer. What opiate would you recommend for my entree?"
A man in a hospital bed has his ski boot act as a counterweight for his broken leg.
Tags:counterweight, counterweights, pulley, pulleys, hospital, hospitals, hospital bed, hospital beds, fracture, fractures, fracturing, broken leg, broken legs, leg, legs, injury, injuries, injured, injuring, ski, skies, skiing, skier, skiers, winter sport, winter sports, culprit, culprits, irony, ironies, ironic, athlete, athletes, athletic, fall, falls, falling, downhill skier, downhill skiers
"I think we got all of it."
"Oh, and get rid of the plant!"
"Not tonight, hon, I have a concussion."
"Would you mind taking a look at this collection of my poems? Your opinion would mean a lot."
Tags:collection, collections, poem, poems, poetry, poet, poets, literary aspiration, literary aspirations, literary ambition, literary ambitions, hospital bed, hospital beds, feedback, feedbacks, literary feedback, literary critic, literary critics, doctor, doctors, bedside manner, unprofessional, patient, patients, patient care, patient-care, hospital treatment, hospital treatments
"Move over! - I just got the bill!"
Tags:bill, bills, medical bill, medical bills, medical expense, medical expenses, medical cost, medical costs, health insurance, medical insurance, sickbed, sickbeds, sick bed, sick beds, hospital, hospitals, hospital bed, shock, shocks, doctor's bill, doctors bill, medical treatment, medical treatments
"I tell you guys you're making a horrible mistake!"
Tags:mummy, mummies, curse, curses, cursing, hospital, hospital bed, hospital beds, mistake, mistakes, accident, accidents, accidental, tomb, tombs, crypt, crypts, bandage, bandages, bandaged, hospital, hospitals, hospitalized, hospitalization, crypt, crypts, grave robber, grave robbers, archaeology, archaeologist, archaeologists, archeologist, archeologists, archeology
"It could be up to a week, but we do have loaners."
"For a hopeless vegetable it's amazing the way he's been able to maintain his sense of humor."
"If it's any consolation, the video went viral."
Tags:patient, patients, hospital bed, hospital beds, broken bone, broken bones, broken all your bones, full body cast, body cast, broken arm, broken arms, broken leg, broken legs, accident, accidents, viral video, viral videos, gone viral, going viral, funny video, funny videos, consolation, consolations
"You're in luck. The doctor switched you to recreational drugs."
"The doctors say you're not doing enough to diagnose yourself."
"Boy, do we hate to see this... I'm afraid your child's entire body is an 'innie'."
As soon as we find as place to put this outdated medical equipment, you should be feeling better."