"We're borrowing the best features of the Canadian system."
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canadian mounted police, hospital, hospitals, patient, patients, healthcare, health care, canadian healthcare, canadian medical care, medical insurance, health insurance, doctor, doctors, canadian healthcare system, national health service, uniform, uniforms, canadian influence, canadian influences"Worse."
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snellen chart, vision, visual, optics, optical, optician, opticians, doctor, doctors, interrogation, gunman, gun to head, gun to his head, interrogate, interrogates, optomologist, optomologists, optometrist, optometrists, eye, eyes, glasses, exam, examination, examinations, kidnap, kidnapped, on pain of death, hospital, hospitals, clinic, clinics, get well, get well soon"This patient has a rare form of medical insurance."
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health insurance, insurance, insurances, health plan, health plans, healthcare plan, healthcare plans, health-care, healthcare coverage, health-care cover, health-care coverage, health care cover, healthcare cover, doctor, doctors, medical, medicine, diagnosis, diagnose, medicaid, hospital, hospitals, hospital bed, priority, priorities"You should just feel a tiny prick, and then a lifetime of morphine addiction."
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hospital, hospitals, clinic, clinics, doctor's office, doctor's office, medical, medicine, doctor, doctors, nurse, patient, patients, health, health care, healthcare, needle, needles, injection, injections, syringe, syringes, pain, painkillers, painkiller, morphine, addict, addicts, addiction, prick, lifetime, lifetimes, drug abuse, medicine abuse, opiate, opiates, opioid, opioids, opiate abuse, opioid abuse"The answer isn't more troops—what you need is an antibiotic."
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hospital, hospitals, clinic, clinics, doctor's office, doctor's office, medical, medicine, doctor, doctors, patient, patients, health, health care, healthcare, diagnosis, diagnoses, treatment, treatments, cure, cures, drug, pharmaceuticals, pharmaceutical, medicines, meds, prescription, prescriptions, pill, pills, antibiotic, antibiotics, infection, infections, strategy, strategies, military, general, generals, officer, officers, troop, troops, war, wars, plan of attack, answer, answers"It's kittens."
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animal, animals, pet, pets, cat, cats, kitten, kittens, litter of kittens, new litter, baby cat, baby cats, waiting, waiting room, waiting rooms, hospital, hospitals, doctor, doctors, maternity ward, maternity wards, birth, born, baby, babies, new baby, new babies, parent, parents, new parent, new parents, parenthood, parenting, father, pregnancy, expecting parents, expecting father, fathers, fatherhood, new father, new fathers, dad, dad, new dad, new dads"Kids, your mother and I have spent so much money on health insurance this year that instead of vacation we're all going to go in for elective surgery."
"Clear!"
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hospital, hospitals, medical, medicine, doctor, doctors, patient, patients, health, health care, healthcare, operation, operations, operating, o.r., o.r.s, or, ors, operating room, operating rooms, operation room, operation rooms, surgery, surgeries, surgeon, surgeons, nurse, clear, cupid, cupids, eros, bow, bows, arrow, arrows, bow and arrow, shooting, love, valentine's day, valentines day, myth, myths, legend, legends, heart, hearts, heart surgery, heart surgeries, heart surgeon, heart surgeons, cardiologist, cardiologists, cardiology"We got him onto an exercise bike, but I'm afraid it was too late."
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hospital, hospitals, clinic, clinics, doctor's office, doctor's office, medical, medicine, doctor, doctors, patient, patients, health, health care, healthcare, waiting area, waiting areas, waiting room, waiting rooms, death, dead, relationship, relationships, marriage, marriages, married life, couple, couples, husband, husbands, wife, wives, spouse, spouses, too late, dead husband, dead husbands, widow, widows, unhealthy, fitness, exercise, exercising, gym equipment, exercise equipment, exercise machine, exercise machines, exercise bike, exercise bikes, bad news, obesity crisis, obesity, overweight"We began with a hip replacement and just sort of riffed off that."
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replacement, hip replacement, robot, robots, bits and bobs, trash, garage sale, yard sale, replaced, replace, upgrade, upgrades, prosthetic, prosthetics, amputees, prosthesis, surgery, surgeon, surgeons, get well, get well soon, hospital, hospitals, doctor, doctors, hip, hips, joint, joints, arthritis, growing old, older, age, aged, ageing"Now with a firm twist, I'll remove his attorney."
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attorney, attorneys, lawyer, lawyers, legal team, legal teams, growth, growths, tumor, tumors, surgeon, surgeons, surgery, surgeries, operation, operations, removal, removals, legal representation, doctor, doctors, physician, physicians, hospital, hospitals, procedure, procedures, removal, removals, legal representative, cancer, cancersTHE DOCTOR'S DILEMMA
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doctor, doctors, medicine, medical, medicals, examine, examines, clinic, hospital, hospitals, house call, house calls, house-call, house-calls, patient, patients, relationship, relationships, marriage, married, husband, husbands, wife, wives, professionalism, examination, diagnosis, treatment, dilemma, dilemmas, decision, difficult, difficulty, easy, unnecessary"Would you describe the pain everyone else causes you as dull and throbbing or sharp like a knife?"
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hospital, hospitals, clinic, clinics, doctor's office, doctor's office, medical, medicine, doctor, doctors, patient, patients, health, health care, healthcare, pain, in pain, describe, examination, examinations, symptom, symptoms, dull, throbbing, sharp, knife, stabbing, anti-social, antisocial, psychology, mental health, therapy, therapist, therapists, shrink, shrinks, psychology, psychologist, psychologists, psychiatry, psychiatrist, psychiatrists, counselor, counselors, counseling, counsellor, counsellors, counselling"So when do we go online?"
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baby, babies, new baby, new babies, new born, new borns, newborn, newborns, internet, the internet, modern tech, modern technology, modern technologies, social media, social network, social networks, social networking, generation z, generation-z, hospital, hospitals, maternity ward, maternity wards, online, computer, computers, smartphone, smartphones, modern life, modern times, modern attitudes"If I knew where I'd lost the sponge, it wouldn't be lost, now, would it?"
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hospital, hospitals, medical, medicine, doctor, doctors, nurse, patient, patients, health, health care, healthcare, operation, operations, operating, o.r., o.r.s, or, ors, operating room, operating rooms, operation room, operation rooms, surgery, surgeries, surgeon, surgeons, lost, sponge, sponges, problem, problems, complication, complications, mistake, mistakes, malpractice, medical malpractice"Come quickly—I think I had an out-of-pocket experience."
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doctor, doctors, hospital, hospitals, medicine, medicines, health, healthy, health-care, health care, healthcare, medicare, medi care, obamacare, obama care, health insurance, insurance, medical insurance, patient, patients, nurse, out-of-pocket, out of pocket, illness, ill, sick, sickness, disease, diseases, get well, get well soon, critic, critical, critique, critically"I have no objection to alternative medicine so long as traditional medical fees are scrupulously maintained."
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medical, doctors, hospitals, science, pseudo, money, psychology, greed, ethics, alternative medicine, traditional medicine, western medicine, doctor, doctors, medical fee, medical fees, american healthcare, american health care, for-profit healthcare, conflict of interest, conflicts of interest, medical bill, medical bills, mankoff"What about that! His brain still uses the old vacuum tubes."
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brain, brains, mind, surgery, surgeons, surgeon, doctor, doctors, medical, medicine, operation, operations, patient, patients, vacuum tubes, vacuum tube, computer, computers, first-generation, first generation, technology, progress, circuit, circuits, hospital, hospitals, surprise, evolution, evolve, evolving, technologies, digital, digitalisation, digitalization"We find pizza softens the blow of bad news."
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bad, bad news, bearer of bad news, doctor, doctors, patient, patients, hospital, hospitals, surgery, surgeon, surgeons, death, dead, black humor, black humour, comfort food, comforting, comfort, food, pizza, pizzas, dark humor, dark humour, gallows humor, gallows humour, death, dead, died, dying, terminal, terminal illness, medical, medicine"I'll have someone come in and prep you for the bill."
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doctor, doctors, surgery, surgeries, expense, expenses, medical expense, medical expenses, prep, preps, prepare, prepares, preparing, medical bill, medical bills, billing, hospital, hospitals, hospitalization, hospital bed, hospital beds, debt, debts, co-pay, co-pays, co-payment, payment, payments, obamacare, aca, affordable care act, repeal, repeals, repealing"Just take a seat, Mr. Bern. You're acting as if you were the only one here who's been shot."
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waiting room, waiting rooms, gun shot, gunshot, gunshots, shooting victim, shooting victims, gun crime, gun crimes, dramatics, melodrama, melodramatic, melodramas, receptionist, receptionists, unsympathetic, a&e, doctor's office, doctors office, a & e, medical emergency, medical emergencies, gun victim, wound, wounds, wounded, gunshot wound, gunshot wounds, entitled, entitlement, american healthcare, united states healthcare, healthcare system, healthcare systems, emergency room, emergency rooms, hospital, hospitals"But think of all the things you're not going to die of."
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bearer, bearer of bad news, bad news, terminal, terminally, terminal illness, illness, ill, sick, sickness, healthy, medically, doctor, doctors, consultant, consulting, depressed, depressing, depression, mortality, mortal, get well, get well soon, morbid, morbidly, gallows humor, gallows humour, death, dead, dying, die, died, die of, hospital, hospitals, clinic, clinics, check up, check-up, appointment"The ultrasound showed it wasn't a pearl, but I am pregnant."
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animal, animals, talking animal, talking animals, clam, clams, oyster, oysters, hospital, hospitals, clinic, clinics, radiologist, radiologists, radiology, ultrasound, ultrasounds, technician, technicians, ultrasonography, obstetric ultrasound, obstetric sonography, sonographer, sonographers, sonogram, sonograms, baby, babies, pregnancy, pregnancies, pearl, pearls"You appear to have caught that bug that's been going around my waiting room."
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flu, flues, influenza, cold, colds common cold, common colds, waiting room, waiting rooms, doctor appointment, doctor appointments, infection, infections, bug, bugs, interior, interiors, infectious disease, infectious diseases, hospital, hospitals, breeding ground, breeding grounds, petri dish, petri dishes