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"I can't say I like the looks of that bunch."
"Jack, here, is the most fascinating man I've ever met—he's in alcohol-abuse counselling, he goes to a sexual-harassment support group, he's in a race-relations workshop, and he spends every weekend in prison."
"As Seen on "Cops""
"If it's any help, your sentence was the most e-mailed story of the week."