Insult Cartoons

"Where did you get those big brown eyes and that tiny mind

"What are you - some kind of justice freak?"

"You're really light on your feet for a dog."

"We did find a creative bone in your body, but it was very untalented."

"I'm going to be late, dear. It's total craziness here."

"I should be more like Sharon Stone? You should be more like Sharon Stone!"

"I am a member of the legal profession, but I'm not a lawyer in the pejorative sense."

"I see that there's an excellent sale on diddly-squat at the Zilchtown Mall in Nowheresville, New Jersey."

"Midnight already? Zounds! My wife will heap contumely upon my head!"

Jump Boy!God, your life must be dull.

"Duh!"

Strange Aftertaste birthday cards.

"If it says to add water, and I'm the one who adds it, I'm cooking."

"Get a life."

"Maybe nobody goes to your Web site because it's about you."

Personnel

"I figured you'd end up looking like that."

"I can get out most of the stains, but some will remain to remain you what a slob you are."

"And I'll thank you not to refer to these as my Barbara Bush pearls."

"I'm not a scaredy-cat - I'm phobic."

"He's in a better place now-no offense to Buffalo."

"I've never said this to anyone before, David, but you've got some pigeon droppings or something in your hair."

"Anyone here a 'worthless, no-good drunken bum'?"

"You're completely screwed up."

"That's not how I sat on you."