"There you are!"
Tags:missing people, missing person, missing persons, bureau of missing persons, there you are, found, find, incompetent, incompetence, missing people, disappear, disappearances, disappearance, disappearing, going missing, missing persons unit, governments, public service, public services, failing services, police, detective, detectives, investigator, investigators
"Sorry to crash the party, folks, but all the little people that made it happen were just discovered buried in a shallow grave outside Bakersfield."
Tags:dark humour, dark humor, black humour, black humor, dead, die, died, death, dying, killed, killing, killer, killers, murder, murders, murderer, murderers, investigate, investigative, investigator, investigators, fbi, f.b.i., federal bureau of investigation, detective, detectives, police, policeman, policemen, police officer, police officers, cop, cops, crimes, criminal, criminals, hollywood, bakersfield, california, award, awards, ceremony
"Seen my gumshoes, doll?"
Tags:mystery, mysteries, detective, detective, investigator, investigators, gumshoe, gumshoes, sleuth, sleuths, private eye, private eyes, private detective, private detectives, literature, book, books, novel, novels, shoe, shoes, footwear, fashion, style, clothes, clothing, language, word play, wordplay
"When I signed up for the thought police, I didn't know it would be so damn boring."
Tags:thought police, the thought police, control, controlling, spy, spys, secret agent, secret agents, investigator, investigators, authoritarian, authoritarian government, authoritarian governments, authoritarian state, authoritarian states, thought bubble, thought bubbles, thought cloud, thought clouds, false expectation, false expectations, literal interpretation, literal interpretations, privacy, freedom of speech
"Listen carefully, I don't have much time."
"Mom, Dad, this is Kevin, our new ombudsman."
Tags:ombudsman, ombudsmen, parents, parent, parenting, parenthood, mom, moms, mother, mothers, motherhood, dad, dads, father, fathers, fatherhood, child, children, kid, kids, childhood, family, families, investigate, investigator, investigators, investigating, investigative, authority, critic, complaint, complaints, house, household, troubleshoot, troubleshooter, troubleshooting, troubleshooters, adviser, advisers, counsellor, counsellors, family counselling, angry, anger, shock, shocked, surprised, shocking, mad, child protective services
'I'll take the case,' I said. Or did I? I fear I'm no longer able to differentiate between interior and exterior monologue.'
"I'll have the Investigator's Special."
Tags:restaurant, restaurants, dining out, eating out, meal, meals, food, eating, dining, waiter, waiters, server, servers, waitress, waitresses, order, orders, ordering, menu, menus, special, specials, investigation, investigations, investigator, investigators, special investigator, special investigators, special agent, special agents, cia, fbi, federal bureau of investigation, central intelligence agency
"I'll take it."
Tags:statue, statues, sculpture, sculptures, bird, birds, falcon, falcons, antique, antiques, antique hunting, antique hunter, antique hunters, treasure, treasures, detective, detectives, mystery, mysterious, mysteries, shopping, shop, shops, store, stores, discovery, discoveries, discover, gumshoe, gumshoes, sleuth, sleuths, investigator, investigators, film, films, book, books, film-noir, film noir, classic film, classic films
"I get it- the old caffeinated-cop, decaffeinated-cop routine."
Tags:crime scene, scene of the crime, crime scene investigation, crime scene investigator, crime scene investigators, investigate, investigator, investigators, investigation, investigation, detective, detectives, police, police officer, police officers, cop, cops, mystery, mysteries, solve, justice, criminal investigation, criminal investigations, show, shows, program, programs, programmes, programmes, tv, t.v., television, rural, farm, farms, farming, regional, tulsa, oklahoma, cow, cows, dead, death, dead body
Tags:crime show, crime shows, crime scene, crime scenes, investigator, investigators, investigation, investigations, investigating, cop show, cop shows, cop drama, cop dramas, irs, internal revenue service, tax collector, tax collectors, tax collection, audit, audits, auditing, auditor, auditors, investigator, investigators, income tax, income taxes, tax season, tax seasons, procedural, procedurals
"You were right to call me immediately."
"Detective Grayson. Sleaze."
"Oh, sure, I remember him. He was quiet, mostly kept to himself, paid the rent on time. You know, we were only married for sixteen years."
Tags:couple, couples, husband and wife, husbands and wives, marriages, long term relationship, long term relationship, long-term relationships, bad relationship, bad relationships, detective, detectives, investigator, investigators, investigation, investigations, police detective, police detectives, criminal investigation, criminal investigation, landlord, landlords, landlady, landladies
"I want you to follow my husband everywhere he goes and nag him."
Tags:sexist, sexists, gender issues, gender inequality, misogyny, misogynist, misogynists, wife, wives, husband, husbands, nag, nagging, nagging wife, nagging wife trope, detective, detectives, private detectives, private detectives, investigator, investigators, private investigator, private investigators, private eye, private eyes, follow, following, stalk stalking, invasion of privacy, intrude, intrusion, intrusive, husband and wife, husbands and wives, bad relationship, bad relationships
"You misunderstand me. I simply mean that I saw additional terrestrials."
"They all lead back to this ball of yarn."
Tags:pinboard, pinboards, pin, pins, pin board, pin boards, string, connection, connections, connecting, yarn, ball of yarn, balls of yarn, killer, killers, killing, mystery, mysteries, investigation, investigations, police investigation, police investigations, investigator, investigators, investigating, crimes, crime and punishment, clue, clues, cliche, cliches, solve, solves, solving, homicide, homicides
"Oh you, you and your stifling regulations."
Tags:robber, robbers, burglar, burglars, thief, thieves, burglary, petty theft, loot bag, loot bags, swag bag, sway bags, police, the police, police officer, police officers, detective, detectives, investigator, investigators, caught, caught red handed, apprehend, apprehended, arrest, arrested, arrests, regulation, regulations, law enforcement, red tape
"Have you seen this bug? It's going around."
Tags:virus, viruses, bug, bugs, illness, illnesses, sick, sickness, sicknesses, ill, detective, detectives, investigate, investigator, investigators, infection, infections, biology, doctor, doctors, disease, diseases, missing person, missing persons, suspect, suspects, wanted poster, wanted posters, contagion, contagions, contagious
Tags:animal, animals, talking animal, talking animals, pet, pets, pet owner, pet owners, talking cat, talking cats, cat, feline, felines, cats, cat owner, cat owners, anthropomorphic, anthropomorphism, personification, death, dead, investigation, investigations, investigator, investigators, investigating, suspicious death, police, policeman, policemen, police officer, police officers, cop, cops, morgue, morgues, coroner, coroners, medical examiner, medical examiners, forensics, forensic pathology, cause of death, verdict, verdicts, curiosity, curiosity killed the cat, expression, expressions, wordplay, wordplay, play on words
"By Ned, you're right, inspector—the body has been moved."
Tags:muder, murders, murderer, murderers, body, dead body, dead bodies, moved the body, moving the body, hide the body, hiding the body, detective, detectives, investigator, investigators, di, dis, murder mystery, murder mysteries, guilt, guilty, destroy the evidence, destroying the evidence, responsible, responsibility, criminal, criminals, cover up, cover-up
"Amazing report - it's good this Captain Marvel fellow is on our side."
"What are you thinking of, Dear?" "Oh just something I said to Robert Mueller."
Tags:prison, prisons, jail, jails, fraud, criminal, criminals, scandal, scandals, unethical, ethics, white-collar crime, white collar crime, corrupt, corruption, attorney-client privilege, secret, secrets, robert mueller, mueller, trump, president trump, donald trump, lawyer, lawyers, counselor, counselors, counsellors, counsellors, attorney, attorneys, solicitor, solicitors, barrister, barristers, legal counsel, special counsel, director, directions, fbi, f.b.i., federal bureau of investigation, investigation, investigations, investigator, investigators, politics, government, governments, united states, us, u.s., united states of america, usa, u.s.a., america, american, election, elections, mistake, mistakes, bad idea, bad ideas, anxiety, anxious, worry, worrying, worried, stressed, stressful, stress
"We already have a state of the art security system. Why do we need a house detective?"