Killers Cartoons

"For God's sake, think! Why is he being so nice to you?"

"After we have sex but before I kill you, I'm going to need your help with some shelves."

"Why can't you be more like Hutchinson? You don't hear him complaining."

Mobsters sending a victim down a water slide wearing cement shoes

Conspiracy Theories $10

"Sorry to crash the party, folks, but all the little people that made it happen were just discovered buried in a shallow grave outside Bakersfield."

Normal Paisley - Deadly Strain is Introduced.

"It's not personal. The boss just doesn't like seeing people in so much debt for such a useless degree."

"I'm thinking it might be time to find another pier."

"And here goes the gun signalling the start of the season."

"First, you're gonna dig a hole."

"Objection, Your Honor! Alleged killer whale."

"The killer had to be a man. Not only is the knife still bloody—it wasn't even put in the sink."

"You simply must meet my husband."

"If it slows down, just ask my father about the murder he always swears he did not commit."

"Well, Hell is going to be so packed – I guess I'd just as soon get there early."

"Oh, and give the executive the right to rain down death from on high."

"All I can figure is that he must have been inspecting the water quality of our lakes and rivers when he became entangled in cement."

"Janet, cancel my Guido's reservation. I'll be having lunch in the office."

"I begged him to get help."

"Looks like an inside job."

"God, these throw-pillows are terrible for smothering."

Zero Dark Thirtysomething

"But first we're going to watch your phone die."

"For your information, this 'stuff' happens to be my husband!"