Killings Cartoons

"After we have sex but before I kill you, I'm going to need your help with some shelves."

"Little Joey invented the one-click rubout."

"Anti-personnel land mines pose no threat to people, Colonel. Only to personnel."

"No! No! I swear I didn't say nothing!"

"This is fun. Too bad about Frank."

"One of you will always wonder if this could have been settled differently."

"...but I have a fourth Epstein theory..."

"Flak jackets are in aisle twelve."

Eddie (The Sandman) Fasolino

"Mommy, Mommy—Skippy's found Daddy!"

"You've been in harness for twenty seven years, Hargraves, and now we'd like to shoot you."

A man is seated as his desk, looking up with a fly swatter in front of him and flies stuck to the front of the desk.

"This is Mrs. Burlington Wells. One of my begonias went off by accident and killed Mr. Goodrich."

"This, ladies and gentlemen, is Exhibit A, the sneakers that urged my client to Just Do It."

"So, now you don't want him 'whacked'. Do I get a 'kill' fee?"

"Boy, that was some great fight!"

"Whodunit?"

"Gee, Amelia, I'm really very sorry you won't be able to make it here tonight."

"I'm very touched, fellows."

"You'd think over the years one or two of them would catch on."

"I understand the special effects on this one are pretty realistic!"

"Mr. Sherman, you hired our team of management consultants to stremline your enterprise, and that is precisely what we are doing."

"It's a good thing Effie likes these little funerals, she's had such awful luck with her pets."

"Yes, we cater to a rather specialized clientele."

"I'm sure of it, Harry—it's that nice Mr. Bently we met on the tour!"