Law Cartoons

"Run it by legal." "Run it by accounting."

"Innocence is no excuse."

"Me? I'm just one of those shadowy figures who inhabit the mysterious twilight world where the medical and legal professions meet."

"Well, heck! If all you smart cookies agree, who am I to dissent?"

"And here's good news for the defense. I am disqualifying myself on the grounds of blatant prejudice."

"Never mind what I did, Your Honor. I want to be judged for who I am, as an individual."

"Ask the judge whether we can find the defendant not guilty and still execute him."

"Not guilty, Your Honor, and thank you for asking."

"I'm just here for the dental."

"No, I don't think your decisions are too Draconian. Do you think my decisions are too Draconian?"

"My question is for the medical examiner."

"And now may I bite your neck?"

"My bill isn't terribly controversial. It would provide modest tax breaks for people who don't really need them."

"The Feds have authorized me to leave your child behind."

"Hey, the Constitution isn't engraved in stone."

"It's the S.E.C. How do you plead?"

"I'm sorry, I can't help you-you're subject to bird law now."

"I have two mommies. I know where the apostrophe goes."

"Did you join the testimony-of-the-month club?"

"Of course, your case against him would be a lot stronger if you had made him sign a pre-peccadillo agreement."

"So he got a trophy for good sportsmanship – that doesn't mean he won't go to law school."

"Any intellectual property yet, honey?"

"Learned counsel should use shorter words. Learned counsel is forgetting that this Court was not an 'A' student."

"Some people say you can't put a price on a wife's twenty-seven years of loyalty and devotion. They're wrong."

"Are you telling me that just because something is against the law, that makes it illegal?"