Malpractice Cartoons

"This is a second opinion. At first, I thought you had something else."

"First, we'll look for repressed memories of malpractice suits."

"If I knew where I'd lost the sponge, it wouldn't be lost, now, would it?"

"Why carry malpractice insurance if you don't malpractice once in a while?"

"You'll need to find another attorney. I'm going to prison."

"I do corporate, divorce, and malpractice, but I'm most familiar with leash laws."

"Hey, I've operated on this guy before—there are my initials."

"The doctor is in court on Tuesdays and Wednesdays."

"Shows you how much I know."

"I can catch-you can't throw."

"Nowadays, Mr. Lambert, we practice preventive medicine. In laymen's terms, this means I don't do a damn thing until I talk to my lawyer."

"Your infection may be antibiotic-resistant, but let's see how it responds to intensive litigation."

"It's not our policy to disclose details of a future operation."

Surgical Ward- Please Replace Divots

"More ashtray, nurse! For God's sake, more ashtray!"

"Good. Now start it up again."

"I don'y know who did her, but when she laughs the wrinkles go in very weird directions."

"Try jiggling the liver."

"I forget. If I have an adverse reaction, do I call my doctor or my lawyer?"

"We'll be performing the operation using original instruments."

"Don't worry, I've performed this procedure hundreds of times."

"We did the best we could, but I was doing drugs during most of medical school."

"First, do no harm. After that, go nuts."

"I want you to lie as still as possible while Lyle and I take our lunch break."

"If the treatment hasn't helped, Mrs. Jensen, I think the best thing you can possibly do is sue me. Litigation is often very therapeutic."