Marriage Problems Cartoons

"It's like you haven't heard a single thing I've thought."

"I'm sorry, dear. I wasn't listening. Could you repeat what you've said since we've been married?"

"What rhymes with 'failed marriage'?"

"Companionable! Tonto was companionable!"

"Look, I can't promise I'll change, but I can promise I'll pretend to change."

"I'm not trying to change you—I'm trying to enhance you."

"It's as though everything nice about you had been just some kind of introductory offer."

"O.K., I admit it, we're lost, but the important thing is to remain focussed on whose fault it is."

"Maybe you ought to consider making love in the morning - before you have a chance to piss each other off."

"Talk to me, Alice. I speak woman."

"Hey, honey! I thought of something else you can put on your restraining order."

"Honey, wake up! I just remembered something you did that annoyed the hell out of me!"

"Now that I've moved my files down here to the basement, we'll be able to spend a lot more time together."

"And may all your chakras be blocked!"

"You've changed, Howie."

"The kids love it, and it's saved my marriage."

"After you've finished discussions with out allies, we have to talk."

"I'm selling you on eBay."

"You don't look like you filed."

"I'm using my married name right now, but I'm keeping my maiden name on ice, just in case."

"I'm sorry I ever said that was cute."

"I'm on sabbatical from a marriage in Lewiston, Maine."

"My wife doesn't understand me, and I bet she wouldn't understand you, either."

Cheaters - The Singles Bar for Married People

"Hey, I'm in the mood for love—be back in a few hours."