"Now we'll need a sitter for New Year's Eve."
Tags:nativity, christmas story, nativity scene, mary, joseph, jesus, baby jesus, christmas, xmas, christmas eve, new years, new year's, new years eve, new year's eve, baby, mum, mom, dad, parent, parents, parenting, new parents, new baby, baby, babies, newborn, newborns, babysitter, sitter, babysitters, sitters, bible, child, children, kid, kids, nanny, nannies, bethlehem, break
"My self-esteem was so low I just followed her around everywhere she would go."
Tags:lamb, lambs, sheep, animal, animals, self esteem, self-esteem, confident, confidence, confidently, mary, mary had a little lamb, nursery rhyme, nursery rhymes, nursery-rhyme, nursery-rhymes, following, follow, dating, dates, ask out, asking out, ask on a date, the lamb was sure to go, folk song, perspective, sad, pity
"I knew Mary would dump me when my fleece got a little gray."
Tags:mary had a little lamb, nursery rhyme, nursery rhymes, poem, poems, poetry, story, stories, children's story, children's stories, fairytale, fairytales, fairy tale, fairy tales, rhyme, rhymes, character, characters, animal, animals, sheep, talking animal, talking animals, mary, lamb, lambs, little lamb, fleece, white, grey, gray, gray hair, gray hairs, grey hair, grey hairs, silver, hair, old age, ageing, aging, growing old, growing older, going gray, going grey, relationship, relationships, relationship problems, relationship issues, dating, couple, couples, break-up, break-ups, breakup, breakups, break up, break ups, split, dump, dumped
"We didn't want to know the gender in advance."
Tags:pregnancy, pregnancies, expecting, expecting parent, expecting parents, expecting family, mom, moms, mum, mums, mother, mothers, motherhood, father, fathers, fatherhood, dad, dads, parent, parents, parenthood, baby, babies, kid, kids, child, children, genders, gender reveal, gender reveals, ultrasound, ultrasounds, technology, testing, doctor, doctors, nurse, obstetrician, obstetricians, medical, medicine, angel, angels, gabriel, annunciation, announcement, announcements, new testament, bible, mary, joseph, jesus, baby jesus, jesus christ, modern life, religion, religious
"Wow! Gold, frankincense, myrrh—and a six-pack!"
Tags:religion, religious, bible, biblical, new testament, jesus, baby jesus, jesus christ, son of god, joseph, mary, stable, stables, the christmas story, nativity, gold, frankincense, myrrh, six-pack, six-packs, beer, beers, alcohol, drink, drinks, new baby, new babies, baby, babies, new parent, new parents, new father, new fathers, new dad, new dads, dad, dads, father, fathers, gift, gifts, present, presents, three kings, three magi, three wisemen, three wise men, baby shower, baby showers, baptism, christmas, noel, the first christmas, yule, xmas
"I'm really excited about this opportunity, but I'm hoping there's room to negotiate the title? What about 'Rise-to-the-Occasion-Mary', or 'Cool-Under-Pressure-Mary'?"
"I'm doing the thank-you notes, Joseph. Do you remember if Balthazar brought the myrrh or the frankincense?"
Tags:religion, religious, bible, biblical, new testament, nativity story, christmas story, mary, joseph, jesus, jesus christ, baby jesus, birth of jesus, jesus's birth, son of god, thank you, thank yous, thank you note, thank you notes, thank you card, thank you cards, writing, three wise men, three kings, magi, balthazar, melchior, caspar, gold, frankincense, myrrh, gift, gifts, present, presents, christmas, noel, yule
"...and Jerry here has brought the gift of 'The Gab'."
Tags:religion, religious, bible, biblical, new testament, three kings, three wise men, magi, the christmas story, nativity, the birth of jesus, jesus's birth, bethlehem, jesus, jesus christ, christmas, noel, yule, xmas, mary, joseph, bethlehem, gift, gifts, present, presents, gift of gab, gab, talking, speaking, novelty glasses, nose glasses
A woman carrying a baby being turned out into a snowstorm by the Minotaur
Tags:religion, religious, bible, new testament, christmas, xmas, noel, yule, jesus's birth, the birth of jesus, son of god, jesus, jesus christ, baby jesus, mary, mother of god, jesus's mother, the nativity, christmas story, mother, mothers, baby, babies, mom, moms, mum, mums, kid, kids, child, children, greek, greece, ancient, myth, myths, legend, legends, mythology, bull, bulls, minotaur, minotaur's maze, minotaur's labyrinth, maze, mazes, labyrinth, labyrinths, snow, snowing, snowstorm, snowstorms, footprints, weather, winter, bad weather, turning away, turned away, sent away, leaving, creature, creatures, monster, monsters, charity, uncharitable, uncompassionate, season of giving, pasiphae
"Go away. We're still Jewish."
Tags:religion, religious, bible, new testament, jesus, jesus christ, birth of jesus, nativity, nativity scene, christmas story, baby jesus, mary, joseph, christmas, xmas, yule, noel, jewish, judaism, go away, shepherd, shepherds, magi, three wisemen, three kings, animal, animals, christianity, crowd, crowds, crowded, shpasik, jtoons
"King Herod sent us."
Tags:nativity, nativity story, nativity scene, birth of jesus, jesus birth, jesus, christ, jesus christ, the birth of christ, mary, the virgin mary, i.c.e., ice, immigration and customs enforcement, immigration, immgration controversy, immigration controversies, immigrants, anti-immigration, christian values
"I'm really excited about this opportunity, but I'm hoping there's room to negotiate the title? What about 'Rises-to-the-Occasions-Mary?', or 'Cool-Under-Pressure-Mary?'
Tags:mary, virgin mary, gabriel, angel gabriel, angel, angels, message from god, messages from god, nativity, nativity story, birth of christ, christianity, virginity, title, titles, job title, job titles, impressive job titles, embarrassing job titles, negotiate, negotiates, negotiation, promotion, opportunity, opportunities
'No Room' at the Inn