"I see that there's an excellent sale on diddly-squat at the Zilchtown Mall in Nowheresville, New Jersey."
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new jersey, insult, insults, insulting, new york, new yorker, new yorkers, new york city, snob, snobs, snobby, rival, rivals, rivalry, bicker, bickers, bickering, sale, sales, outlet, outlet mall, outlet malls, mall, malls, mock, mocks, mocking, mockery, mockeries, consumer, consumerism, consumerist, save money, saves money, saving money, argue, argues, arguing, husband, husbands, wife, wives, spouse, spouses, married couple, married couples, couple, couples"She's so Jersey."
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animal, animals, talking animal, talking animals, cow, cows, cattle, talking cow, talking cows, livestock, farm, farms, farming, farmer, farmers, field, fields, pasture, pastures, new jersey, states, state, american state, american states, jersey, jersey cow, jersey cows, dairy cow, dairy cows, dairy farmer, dairy farmers, dairy farm, dairy farms, holstein-friesian, holstein friesian, trashy, low-class, loud, obnoxious, stereotype, stereotypes, new jerseyan, new jerseyans, jerseyite, jerseyites, new jerseyite, new jerseyites"I didn't realize, Your Honor. I assumed the law here was the same as in New Jersey. As you may know, dog eat dog is permissible there."
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court, courts, courtroom, courtrooms, trial, trials, legal system, justice system, law, laws, judge, judges, lawyer, lawyers, counselor, counselors, counsellors, counsellors, attorney, attorneys, solicitor, solicitors, barrister, barristers, legal counsel, animal, animals, talking animal, talking animals, talking pet, talking pets, pet, pets, pet owner, pet owners, talking dog, talking dogs, dog, dogs, dog owner, dog owners, anthropomorphic, anthropomorphism, personification, dog eat dog, dog-eat-dog, animal law, dog law, new jersey, defendant, defendants, client, clients, defense, defence, permissible, phrase, phrases, word play, wordplay"Face it - there is no good time to get married, have children, and move to Jersey."
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have children, children, kids, married, marriage, kid, marries, life, decision, decisions, time, timing, timed, life planning, planned, jersey, new jersey, jersey city, life advice, advice, advise, advising, adviser, relationship, relationships, marry, have kids, move house, moving house, middle age, middle-age, average life, typical, no good time"So how does that eightfold path get us back on the Garden State?"
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path to enlightenment, paths to enlightenment, new jersey, jersey, garden state, guru, gurus, wiseman, wise man, wisemen, wise men, wisdom, wisdom seeker, wisdom seekers, direction, directions, path, paths, enlighten, enlightens, enlightenment, hike, hikes, hiking, lost, wrong directions, philosophy, philosopher, philosophersWashington Crossing the Delaware, Having Been Invited to Join the Faculty at Princeton
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new jersey, princeton, professor, professors, delaware, washington, george washington, icon, icons, iconic, cross the delaware, crossing the delaware, founding father, founding fathers, tenure, teacher, teachers, teaching, job offer, job offers, ivy league, faculty member, faculty members, teaching position, teaching positions, phd, phd candidate, phd candidates"I didn't spend $5.6 million on this place to get involved with the damn sunsets over New Jersey."
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penthouse suite, penthouse suites, new york, new yorker, new yorkers, snob, snobs, snobby, manhattan, jersey, new jersey, lower class, lower classes, regional, rival, rivals, rivalry, rivalries, working class, working classes, upper class, upper classes, hatred, hatreds, regional hatred, regional hatreds, apartment, apartments, balcony, balconies, sunset, sunsets, stubborn, stubbornness"I was rather hoping a Passaic River School might form, but so far it's just me."
"If the Yankees move to New Jersey, will you be going, too?"
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new jersey, new york, yankee, yankees, fan, fans, sports fan, sports fans, sport fan, sport fans, stadium, stadiums, husband, husbands, wife, wives, married life, married couple, divorce, divorces, baseball fan, baseball fans, first love, first loves"Dear Wendy, please excuse the tardiness of my response to your recent tweet from Hoboken."
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cowboy, cowboys, social media, communication, communicate, email, snail mail, mail, letter, letters, writing letters, delayed response, late response, tardy, tardiness, late, delay, delayed, horse, horses, horseback, handwritten, personalized, personalised, personal, hoboken, new jersey, nj, city, cities, country, countryside, mountains, rural, long distance, long distance relationship, long distance relationships, girlfriends, boyfriend, boyfriends, couple, couples, social media, social media post, social media posts, modern life, modern times, letter, letters, writing a letter, writing a letter, loved one, loved ones"Discovering that the light at the end of the end of the tunnel is New Jersey.
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light at the end of the tunnel, expression, expressions, saying, sayings, disappointment, disappointments, let down, let downs, let-down, let-downs, new jersey, new yorks armpit, armpit of new york, tunnel, tunnels, regret, regrets, mistakes, mistake, life choices, bad choices, bad decision, bad decisions"Fuggedaboutit!"
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jersey, new jersey, state, states, accent, accents, jersey accent, forget about it, cat, cats, kitty, kitties, kitten, kittens, pussycat, pussycats, cat owner, cat owners, pet, pets, pet owner, pet owners, animal, animals, cat lady, cat ladies"In a controversial move today, the State of Rhode Island made a tender offer for the State of New Jersey."
"And this was the man I thought was your father until E-Z Pass records proved that he was in New Jersey when you were conceived."
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e-z pass, new jersey, new york, new york city, new jersey turnpike, turnpike, conceive, conceives, conceiving, conception, conceptions, parent, parents, photo album, photo albums, nostalgia, memory, memories, sleep around, sleeps around, sleeping around, family tree, family trees, parentage, mistake, mistakes, accident, accidents, son, sons, mother, mothers, unknown father, father, fathers, slut shame, slut shames, slut shaming"If it isn't genetic at all, but just the upshot of growing up in Jersey, will you still love me, Mona?"
Schematic Map of Seaside Heights Town Beach, Summer, 2007
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beach, beach vacation, beach vacations, beach holiday, beach holidays, vacation, vacations, summer, summer months, cliche, cliches, beach-goer, beach-goers, family fight, family fights, glass, hazard, hazards, shell, shells, screaming baby, screaming babies, seaside, seaside heights, jersey shore, new jersey