New Parents Cartoons

"It's kittens."

"Now we'll need a sitter for New Year's Eve."

"He hums in his sleep."

"My baby is not on backwards - your baby is on backwards."

"Hey, little fella. Welcome to the risk pool."

What to Expect When You're Expecting

"My boyfriend is the son my parents always wanted."

"We've decided that it will be better for his later development if we speak to him only in legalese."

"We want one that's genetically gifted but not genetically spoiled."

"Half a dozen brown—three large, three jumbo!"

"Humor should be employed to defuse tension, not create it."

"I'm all for pushing them out of the nest, but maybe next time we could wait till they hatch."

"I want to have at least two children - I have too much guilt to give for just one."

"Your daughter has 'I have something to share' syndrome."

"Right now I'm a stay-at-home dad, but when this baby comes I'm going back to work."

"Listen up and listen up good, 'cause I'm only going to say this a million times."

"Wow! Gold, frankincense, myrrh—and a six-pack!"

"He looks like a Björn."

"What's her working title?"

"The ducks are too infantilizing."

"Jakey's not a huge fan of spicier dishes, but we do want him to know what's out there."

"Sometimes it seems you don't want to talk about baby strollers."

"I had a bad dream that you were getting rest."

"You know, statistically speaking, at least one of these gingerbread men is gay."

"The only ghosts you need fear are the ghosts of your past—which will gnaw away at your soul, riddle you with self-doubt, and ultimately sap you of your will to live."