"You keep saying 'ice fishing' as if there were some other kind."
Tags:ice fishing, ice-fishing, ice fisher, ice fishers, ice-fisher, ice-fishers, fishing, fisherman, fishermen, ice fisherman, ice fishermen, eskimos, inuit, inuits, cold, cold weather, ice, icy, frozen lake, frozen lakes, isolation, isolated, close minded, close-minded, close-mindedness, winter, winters, north pole, greenland, community, communities
Tags:sirloin, short loin, round, rump, reindeer, reindeers, meat cut, meat cuts, santa, santa claus, father christmas, saint nick, st nick, st. nick, saint nicholas, st nicholas, st. nicholas, festive period, festive season, seasonal work, seasonal job, seasonal jobs, elf, elves, north pole, chef, chefs, cook, cooks, reindeer meat
"What a Christmas! First the North Pole melts, then all the elves get laid off."
The Penguins of Las Vegas
"Great. You move to Mexico, and we all end up working at McDonald's."
Tags:mexico, outsource, outsources, outsourcing, relocate, relocates, relocating, tax dodger, tax dodgers, tax dodging, job loss, job losses, globalism, globalist, globalists, santa, santa claus, north pole, elf, elves, downsize, downsizes, downsizing, worker, workers, average worker, average workers, factory job, factory jobs, ship overseas, shipping overseas, maquiladora, maquiladoras, father christmas, business, businesses, businessman, businessmen, bottom line, bottom lines, wage, wages, nafta, north american free trade agreement, usmca, united states mexico and canada agreement, trump, donald trump
Tags:security, security guard, security, metal detector, scanner, body scanners, santa, santa claus, father christmas, christmas, christmas time, santas grotto, santa's grotto, modern life, modern attitudes, mall santa, mall, malls, shopping malls, shopping mall, shopping center, shopping centers, shopping centre, shopping centre, full body scanner, security body scanner, over cautious, overcautious, elf, elves, santa's elves, santas elves, north pole, the north pole
Please give so I don't have to sell reindeer blood for wine money.
Tags:winos, santa, santas, santa claus, charity, charities, mall, malls, salvation army, raise money, raises money, raising money, homeless, alcoholic, alcoholics, alcoholism, threat, threats, threaten, threatens, panhandle, panhandles, panhandling, panhandler, panhandlers, reindeer, north pole, intimidate, intimidates, intimidating, intimidation, beggar, beggars, begging, christmas, christmas season, holiday season
"I'd like to see old Ho-Ho-Ho try to assemble one of these damn toys."
"And I'm telling you you've got the wrong pole."
Tags:telephone, telephones, phone, phones, phonecall, phonecalls, penguin, penguins, north pole, south pole, wrong number, wrong numbers, irritating, irritation, irritated, nuisance call, nuisance calls, prank call, prank calls, nuisance caller, nuisance callers, cold call, cold calls, cold caller, cold callers, modern life, modern times, modern attitudes, modern technology, modern technologies
"I don't care who's naughty or nice anymore-I only keep track of who's crossed me."
Tags:christmas, christmases, christmas time, winter, winters, naughty and nice, naughty list, the naughty list, present, presents, christmas presents, christmas present, father christmas, santa claus, toy, toys, child, kid, kids, childhood, childhood christmas, childhood christmases, list, lists, cross, crossed, been crossed, revenge, vengeful, get revenge, getting revenge, anger, angry, give up, given up, giving up, apathy, apathetic, lazy, laziness, north pole, the north pole
"One day, son, this will all be gone."
Tags:penguin, penguins, penguin colony, penguin colonies, arctic, antarctica, north pole, south pole, environmentalist, environmentalists, environmental activist, environmental activists, melting icecap, melting, icecap, ice-cap, ice-caps, global warming, climate change, climate-change, legacy, legacies, inheritance, heir, hairs, inheritances
"Of course, once this melts we're homeless again."
"So then I said to myself, 'Why should I make toys when I can make the deals to make the toys?' "
Tags:toy, toys, elf, elves, workshop, workshops, christmas, north pole, entrepreneur, entrepreneurs, businessman, businessmen, head for business, toy shop, toy shops, worker, workers, middle man, middle men, profit, profits, profiting, union, unions, union employee, union employees, union worker, union workers, corporate ladder, work up, working up, work your way up, working your way up, creator, creators, inventor, inventors, invention, inventions, business deal, business deals, dealmaker, dealmakers, negotiator, negotiators, negotiation, negotiations, xmas, x-mas, santa's workshop, workshop, workshops, father christmas
"I can remember when there was nothing here but polar ice."
Tags:global warming, climate change, hot weather, destination, destination vacation, destination vacations, vacation, vacations, vacationing, icecap, icecaps, melt, melts, melting, glacier, glaciers, condo, condos, condominium, condominiums, beachfront, beachfront property, beachfront properties, beach, beaches, polar, polar ice, antarctica, antarctic, arctic, vacation, vacations, vacationing, north pole, south pole
December 26th . . . The Returns
Tags:christmas, xmas, noel, yule, santa claus, santa, elf, father christmas, st. nick, st. nicholas, elves, north pole, december, december 26th, december 26, the day after christmas, boxing day, return, returns, returning, exchange, exchanges, unwanted gifts, unwanted presents, gift, gifts, present, presents, shopping, christmas chopping, store, stores, shop, shops, sack, sacks, consumerism, santa's helper, santa's helpers
"Now who's laughing all the way?
Tags:santa, santas, santa clause, north pole, reindeer, rudolph, rudolph the red nosed reindeer, north pole, sled, sleigh, sleds, sleighs, role reversal, role reversals, boss, bosses, revenge, retaliation, retaliate, christmas, turn about, turn about is fair play, turnabout, turnabout is fair play, idiom, idioms, employees, employee
"So this is why you hide up here at the North Pole all year!!"
"Of course I'm p****d! I just found out we're getting these things for our Christmas bonus!"
Tags:christmas, christmas time, santa's workshop, santas work shop, elf, elves, santas elves, santa's elves, toy factory, toy factories, north pole, the north pole, christmas bonus, christmas bonuses, employee, employees, employer, employers, bad employer, bad employers, let-down, let-downs, let down, let downs, disappointment, disappoint, disappointed, corporation, corporations
"No, I'm not Danish. I'm North Polish."
(H2O H2O H2O)(H2O H2O H2O)(H2O H2O H2O)
"And here's where we make toys for bad little boys and girls!"
Tags:santa, santa claus, father christmas, workshop, workshops, work shop, work shops, elf, elves, naughty list, naughty lists, toy, toys, making toys, north pole, bad list, bad lists, lump of coal, lumps of coal, santa claus is coming to town, naughty children, tortures, christmas, x-mas, xmas, christmas season, holiday season
"What the hell is all this?"
"You're gonna be happy to learn your husband's annual overnight disappearances have a perfectly innocent explanation, Mrs. Claus."
Tags:disappearance, disappearances, private eye, private eyes, cheat, cheats, cheater, cheaters, affair, affairs, adulterer, adulterers, private detective, private detectives, private dick, private dicks, overnight stay, overnight stays, santa claus, father christmas, mrs. claus, north pole, north poles, suspicious, suspiciousness, suspicion, suspicions, innocent explanation, innocent explanations
The personal assistant of Mrs. Claus. The worst job at the North Pole?
Tags:personal assistant, personal assistants, pa, pas, secretary, secretaries, assistant, assistants, elf, elves, mrs claus, mrs. claus, regret, regrets, career change, career changes, career path, career paths, lingerie, underwear, underclothes, lingeries, north pole, job satisfaction, job dissatisfaction