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"There's nothing wrong with the ship. We just got a better offer."
"If I had known I was going to meet somebody like you, I would have lost some weight, gotten some hair plugs, and made more money."
"This is definitely the last time for Chapter Seventeen!"
"It's for my mother. Just wrap it in an envelope with return postage."
"I know you're not a quitter, Pete - in fact, that's the main reason I have no choice but to fire you."
"Also included in the package is a vague sense of your not being good enough to stay here."