"Miss Durban, is there anything C.E.O.-ish for me to do?"
Tags:word play, business, management, ceo, ceos, c.e.o.c.e.o.s, executive, executives, look busy, looking busy, chief executive, chief executives, task, tasks, agenda, agendas, set agenda, set agenda, daily task, daily tasks, secretary, secretaries, assistant, assistants, office assistant, office assistants, office assistance, mankoff
"I was hoping that heaven might be, you know, more transcendent."
Tags:heaven, heavenly, cubicle, cubicles, worker, workers, desk job, desk jobs, angel, angels, office assistant, office assistants, transcend, transcends, underwhelm, underwhelms, underwhelming, dream job, dream jobs, disappointment, disappointments, disappoint, disappoints, let-down, let-downs, expectation, expectations, high expectations, raising expectations, surprise, surprises, unpleasant surprise, unpleasant surprises, eternity, white collar, white collar job, office worker, office workers
"Look, if it's just a matter of collating get one of the clerks to do it."
Tags:collate, collates, collating, clerk, clerks, abstract, abstract art, geometry, order, orders, ordering, secretary, secretaries, office assistant, office assistants, assistance, admin, administrative duty, administrative duties, administrative work, office, office work, office worker, delegate, delegates, delegating
"Ten-fifteen, Ms. Whitney. Time to switch breasts."
Tags:reminder, reminders, secretary, secretaries, office assistant, office assistants, assistant, assistants, organized, organization, mother, mothers, mom, moms, mum, mums, new mother, new mothers, back to work, going back to work, breastfeed, breastfeeds, breastfeeding, breast feed, breast feeds, career, careers, career woman, career women, schedule, schedules, scheduling, tight schedule, tight schedules, feeding schedule, feeding schedules, baby, babies, infant, infants, newborn, newborns
Tags:coordinator, coordinators, office assistant, office assistants, secretary, secretaries, waiting room, waiting rooms, title, titles, job title, job titles, job, jobs, patient, patience, wait, waits, waiting, visitor, visitors, visiting, visit, visits, guest, guests, guest coordinator, guest coordinators
"No—a bigger box."
Tags:secretary, secretaries, office assistant, office assistants, office assistance, assistant, assistance, executive, executives, businessman, businessmen, murder, murders, murdering, cover-up, covering up, covers up, hide the body, hiding the body, casket, caskets, shooting, shootings, workplace shooting, workplace shootings, guilt, guilty, coverup, coverups, underling, underlings, corporate ladder, corporate culture
"One of those fish with the eyes on the same side to see you, sir."
"He usually doesn't see anybody without an appointment, but since you brought pizza ..."
Tags:appointment, appointments, busy, too busy, hold off, holds off, holding off, deflect, deflects, deflecting, defer, defers, deferring, secretary, secretaries, delivery, deliveries, pizza, pizzas, life hack, life hacks, trick, tricks, appointment-only, office assistant, office assistants, manager, managers, ceo, ceos, executive, executives, business executive, business executives
"Miss Crutchfield, have you gone mad?"
Tags:sculpture, sculptures, sculptor, sculptors, modern art, modern artist, modern artists, abstract art, abstract artist, abstract artists, secretary, secretaries, box, boxes, office assistant, office assistants, curve, curves, angular, oil and water, taste, tastes, different taste, different tastes, differing tastes, art, artistic
"That's not what you told my screener you wanted to talk about."
Tags:phone, phones, phone call, phone calls, screen, screens, screening, screener, screeners, secretary, secretaries, boss, bosses, office assistant, office assistants, office assistance, assistant, assistance, chat, chats, chatting, talk, talks, talking, office manager, office managers, business call, business calls, caller, callers, deceive, deceives, deceiving, deception, deceptions, lie, lies, lying, liar, liars
"Miss Windham, I wonder if you would mind stepping in here and joining me in a thirtieth-anniversary chorus or two of 'Blowin' in the Wind'?"
Tags:anniversary, anniversaries, receptionist, receptionists, secretary, secretaries, singalong, singalongs, singing along, harmony, harmonies, harmonize, harmonizes, harmonizing, harmonise, harmonises, harmonising, dylan, bob dylan, office assistant, office assistants, assistance, assistant, assistants
"Hold my video conferencing calls, Gina."
Tags:video conference, video conferences, video conferencing, intercom, intercoms, secretary, secretaries, chat, chats, chatting, business call, business calls, business calling, manager, managers, management, video chat, video chats, conference call, conference calls, casual friday, casual, chill out, chills out, chilling out, relax, relaxes, relaxing, office assistant, office assistants
A businessman saws a woman in half.
Tags:magician, magicians, magic, hierarchy, hierarchies, desk, desks, office desk, office desks, secretary, secretaries, magician's assistant, magician's assistants, magicians assistant, magicians assistants, performance, performances, office assistant, office assistants, corporate ladder, corporate ladders, corporate hierarchy, corporate hierarchies
"Your 5 A.M. is here."
Tags:appointment, appointments, execution, executions, execute, executes, executing, prison, prisons, prisoner, prisoners, criminal, criminals, criminality, wake, wakes, wake up, wakes up, waking up, prison, prisons, prisoner, prisoners, receptionist, receptionists, secretary, secretaries, office assistant, office assistants, office assistance, death row, death rows, inmate, inmates
"If you require immediate assistance, press the pound sign."
Tags:phone, phones, phone menu, phone menus, automation, automated, automated menu, automated menus, touch tone, touch tone phone, touch tone phones, pound sign, pound signs, secretary, secretaries, receptionist, receptionists, office assistant, office assistants, customer service, customer service representative, customer service representatives, assistance
"Mr. Hazlett is in conference right now. Would you care to see his evil twin?"
Tags:evil twin, evil twins, conference, conference room, conference rooms, secretary, secretaries, take a message, takes a message, taking a message, receptionist, receptions, assistant, assistants, office assistant, office assistants, twin, twins, substitute, substitutes, substitution, substitutions, waiting room, waiting rooms
"Pardon me, sir, it's your ten-o'clock cabal."
Tags:cabal, cabals, meeting, meetings, scheduled meeting, scheduled meetings, conspiracy, conspiracies, conspire, conspires, conspiring, criminal conspiracy, criminal conspiracies, loudmouth, loudmouths, giveaway, giveaways, appointment, appointments, scheduled appointment, scheduled appointments, regularly scheduled appointment, regularly scheduled appointments, secretary, secretaries, office assistant, office assistants, meeting time, meeting times, corrupt, corruption, political corruption, politically corrupt
"That will be all, Mrs. Bernstein. During the break, we reached a verbal agreement."
Tags:minutes, taking minutes, stenographer, stenographers, stenography, meeting, meetings, business meeting, business meetings, thankless, thankless task, thankless tasks, secretary, secretaries, verbal agreement, verbal agreements, manager, managers, business manager, business managers, office assistant, office assistants, hard work, working hard, contract, contracts, verbal contract, verbal contracts, problem, problems, murphy's law
"Mr. Phelps is in conference. Hey, trust me."
Tags:secretary, secretaries, receptionist, receptionist, administrative assistant, administrative assistants, assistant, assistants, office assistant, office assistants, phone, phone conversation, phone conversations, telephone, telephones, telephone conversation, telephone conversations, busy, being busy, executive assistant, executive assistants, trust, trust me, gatekeeper, gatekeepers
"A robot was doing my job, but it quit."
Tags:automation, automaton, automatons, dead-end job, dead-end jobs, robot worker, robot workers, filing, tedious, tediousness, office work, secretary, secretaries, office assistant, office assistants, filing clerk, filing clerks, minimum wage, low wage, low wages, unskilled work, unskilled worker, unskilled labor
"...We remain, sincerely yours...."
"He's away attending to a personal matter, but he did leave a number where he can't be reached."
Tags:personal matter, personal matters, secretary, secretaries, away message, away messages, personal phone, personal phone number, personal phone numbers, out of office, out of office message, out of office messages, office assistant, office assistants, executive, executives, number, numbers, contact, contacts, contacting
"What's this? Now we have to hunt, gather AND collate?"
Tags:hunter gatherer, hunter gatherers, office work, office worker, office drone, office drones, collate, collates, admin, administration, administrative work, secretary, secretaries, office assistant, office assistants, assistant, assistants, busywork, job satisfaction, restructure, restructures, restructuring, corporate ladder, corporate culture, corporation, corporations, form, forms, caveman, cavemen, drudgery