Officers Cartoons

"Put simply, the mission is to discover a potential enemy who could justify our three-hundred-billion-dollar defense budget."

"The answer isn't more troops—what you need is an antibiotic."

"Do I know how fast I was going? Isn't that your job?"

Snowman going through airport security

"This next song goes out to anyone who's ever been in love with the idea of invading Iran."

"That's him—the one on the right."

"Officer, shouldn't this be a time for healing?"

"Nope. Looks to me like a clear-cut case of suicide by somehow reaching around behind the back and sticking a knife in backward. Let's get a drink."

"I'm having trouble getting everyone lined up."

"Anti-personnel land mines pose no threat to people, Colonel. Only to personnel."

"Yeah, but it doesn't smell like a bomb!"

A dog dressed as a cowboy leans against a sign that reads "Armed response".

"O.K. That covers the last meal. Now, which would you prefer, hanging, electrocution, or lethal injection?"

"And this is a crossword puzzle I'm working on."

"No flag pin!"

Modern William Tell Uses An Air-Strike To Hit Apple

"Honey, I still think you're the greatest."

"Country Club Dungeon"

"General Torrentine is for when we want something a bit more spontaneous than a measured response."

"Pinpoint havoc, gentlemen, accuracy of mayhem. And yet our dress blues remain crisp and sharp, our hands soft and pink."

General U.S. Grant Displays Rare Emotion At Appomattox.

"Officer, everything in the world is bothering me."

"General Hoskins, I don't care if you are in charge of our star-wars defense. You must wear a regulation uniform."

"All we know is it happened between the hours of 9 A.M. and 4 P.M."

"You can let that go till later, Harris."