"I'll be performing the operation, and this is the anesthesiologist."
Tags:
medicine, medical, doctor, doctors, anaesthesiology, anaesthesiologist, anaesthesiologists, operation, operations, surgery, surgeries, unconscious, club, clubs, hit, knock out, knocked out, knock-out, knocked-out, put to sleep, patient, patients, prehistoric, cavemen, caveman, cave, caves, history, prehistory, ancient"Me? I'm just one of those shadowy figures who inhabit the mysterious twilight world where the medical and legal professions meet."
Tags:
party, cocktails, parties, partying, medical, medicine, pharma, big pharma, big-pharma, pharmaceuticals, medicines, legal, law, laws, legal profession, professions, twilight, dodgy, shady, suspect, sketchy, money, earning, wealthy, corrupt, corruptions, corruption, corrupting, legal, lawyer, lawyers, shadowy, operation, operations, operating, lawful"You know, doctor, right now I'd really prefer if your sense of humor were a tad less self-deprecating."
Tags:
expert, expertise, surgery, surgeries, operation, operations, operate, under the knife, self-deprecating, self-deprecation, unnerve, unnerves, unnerving, upset, upsets, upsetting, surgeon, surgeons, sense of humor, senses of humor, sense of humour, senses of humour, problem, problems, worry, worries, worrying, worrier, worriers, anxious, anxiety, anxieties, doctor, doctors, physician, physicians, bedside manner, manner, manners"You'll be awake during the entire procedure. The anesthesiologist is on vacation."
Tags:
anesthesia, anaesthesia, anesthesiologist, anesthesiologists, anaesthetist, anaesthetists, doctor, doctors, physician, physicians, surgeon, surgeons, surgery, surgeries, surgical procedure, surgical procedures, operation, operations, painkiller, painkillers, general anaesthetic, general anaesthetics, general anesthetic, general anesthetics"And, in our continuing effort to minimize surgical costs, I'll be hitting you over the head and tearing you open with my bare hands."
Tags:
cost, costs, surgical cost, surgical costs, medical expense, medical expenses, medical bill, medical bills, insurance, american healthcare, healthcare, health care, health insurance, save money, saves money, saving money, operation, operations, expense, expenses, surgery, surgeries, surgeon, surgeons, cost-saving, cost-saving measure, cost-saving measures"Clear!"
Tags:
hospital, hospitals, medical, medicine, doctor, doctors, patient, patients, health, health care, healthcare, operation, operations, operating, o.r., o.r.s, or, ors, operating room, operating rooms, operation room, operation rooms, surgery, surgeries, surgeon, surgeons, nurse, clear, cupid, cupids, eros, bow, bows, arrow, arrows, bow and arrow, shooting, love, valentine's day, valentines day, myth, myths, legend, legends, heart, hearts, heart surgery, heart surgeries, heart surgeon, heart surgeons, cardiologist, cardiologists, cardiology"Now with a firm twist, I'll remove his attorney."
Tags:
attorney, attorneys, lawyer, lawyers, legal team, legal teams, growth, growths, tumor, tumors, surgeon, surgeons, surgery, surgeries, operation, operations, removal, removals, legal representation, doctor, doctors, physician, physicians, hospital, hospitals, procedure, procedures, removal, removals, legal representative, cancer, cancers"Do you want that with or without angioplasty?"
Tags:
angioplasty, heart surgery, fat, saturated fat, fats, unhealthy, cholesterol, service, fitness, dining, dines, businessmen, businessman, heart attack, heart attacks, coronary heart disease, cardiac arrest, angioplasties, operation, operations, operating, medical, medicine, stent, stents, mesh, meshes, fatty, greasy, diner, booth, killer"If I knew where I'd lost the sponge, it wouldn't be lost, now, would it?"
Tags:
hospital, hospitals, medical, medicine, doctor, doctors, nurse, patient, patients, health, health care, healthcare, operation, operations, operating, o.r., o.r.s, or, ors, operating room, operating rooms, operation room, operation rooms, surgery, surgeries, surgeon, surgeons, lost, sponge, sponges, problem, problems, complication, complications, mistake, mistakes, malpractice, medical malpractice"What about that! His brain still uses the old vacuum tubes."
Tags:
brain, brains, mind, surgery, surgeons, surgeon, doctor, doctors, medical, medicine, operation, operations, patient, patients, vacuum tubes, vacuum tube, computer, computers, first-generation, first generation, technology, progress, circuit, circuits, hospital, hospitals, surprise, evolution, evolve, evolving, technologies, digital, digitalisation, digitalizationMoving as a board game.
Tags:
board game, board games, operation, operations, moving van, moving vans, van, vans, pack, packs, packing, pack up, packs up, packing up, move house, moves house, moving house, difficult, difficulty, difficulties, move, moves, new house, new home, new homes, unpack, unpacks, unpacking, mover, movers, frustration, frustrations, frustrating, furniture, task, tasks"We're pretty sure it was the dissolving stitches."
Tags:
teddy, teddy bear, teddy bears, stuffed animal, stuffed animals, toy, toys, doctor, doctors, general practitioner, general practitioners, medical check up, medical check ups, hospital, hospitals, doctors appointment, doctors appointments, doctor's appointment, doctor's appointments, physician, physicians, surgeon, surgeons, surgery, surgeries, operation, operations, stitches, dissolving stitches"It would be a great honor for me to be counted as one of your successes."
"Don't you think it's time we talked about Operation Doug?"
Tags:
operation, operations, military operation, military operations, general, generals, work, work-obsessed, workaholic, workaholics, therapist, therapists, therapy session, therapy sessions, military man, military men, army, navy, marines, focus, focuses, focusing, self-care, self-caring, aversion, averse, converse, converses, conversing, talk, talks, talking, talking cure, talking cures, psychologist, psychologists, psychology, shrink, shrinks, headshrinker, headshrinkers, psychiatrist, psychiatrists, psychiatry, psychoanalyst, psychoanalysts, psychoanalysis"Hey, c'mon. This isn't brain surgery."
Tags:
hospital, hospitals, medical, medicine, doctor, doctors, patient, patients, health, health care, healthcare, operation, operations, operating, o.r., o.r.s, or, ors, operating room, operating rooms, operation room, operation rooms, surgery, surgeries, surgeon, surgeons, nurse, brain surgery, brain surgeries, difficult, word play, wordplay"We lose a little dexterity, but we gain a lot of confidence."
Tags:
hospital, hospitals, doctor, doctors, nurse, surgeon, surgeons, surgery, surgeries, operation, operations, or, o.r., operating room, operating rooms, operating, medical, medicine, patient, patients, foam finger, foam fingers, foam hand, foam hands, confidence, confidence boost, confidence booster, confidence boosters, dexterity, #1, number one, no. 1, questionable, skill, skills, sport, sports, cheering"Enough medical mumbo jumbo, just give it to me straight, Doc-will I ever be able to play piano again?"
Tags:
mumbo jumbo, pianist, pianists, headless, disembody, disembodied, injury, injuries, injured, bedside manner, hopeless, lost cause, lost causes, hopelessness, optimist, optimists, optimistic, life support, kept alive, head, heads, medical equipment, operation, operations, accident, accidents, nasty accident, nasty accidents, musician, musicians"While you were under, I had all your friends come in and sign your heart stent."
Tags:
heart, heart problem, heart problems, heart stent, heart stents, signature, signatures, sign, signs, signing, autograph, autographs, open-heart surgery, open-heart surgeries, surgery, surgeries, surgeon, surgeons, pride, cast, casts, patient, patients, operation, operations, support, supportive, friend, friends, friendship, friendships, xray, xrays, x-ray, x-rays"And if the golf area of the brain was somehow destroyed, there might be a little something extra in it for you."
Tags:
hospital, hospitals, medical, medicine, doctor, doctors, patient, patients, health, health care, healthcare, operation, operations, surgery, surgeries, surgeon, surgeons, consultation, consultations, brain surgery, brain surgeon, brain surgeons, neurology, neurologist, neurologists, neurosurgeon, neurosurgeons, sport, sports, golf, golfing, golfer, golfers, hobby, hobbies, leisure, money, bribe, bribes, bribing, corruption, corrupt, area, area, destroyed, brain, brains, relationship, relationships, relationship issues, relationship problems, marriage, marriages, married life, couple, couples, husband, husbands, wife, wives, spouse, spouses, manipulating, manipulation"Hey, I've operated on this guy before—there are my initials."
Tags:
operation, operations, operating, operating room, operating rooms, medical procedure, medical procedures, sign, signs, signing, signature, signatures, autograph, autographs, autographing, malpractice, medical malpractice, lawsuit, lawsuits, calling card, calling cards, surgeon, surgeons, doctor, doctors, physician, physicians, uncaring, hospital, hospitals, hospitalized"According to this, we're not even in Mrs. Feldman anymore."
Tags:
doctor, doctors, surgeon, surgeons, surgery, theatre, theater, surgeries, operation, operations, medicine, medical, map, maps, mapping, map reading, map-reading, bad map reading, navigating, navigation, orienteering, orienting, orientated, navigate, lost, losing, misunderstanding, misunderstood, tracking, track"Which one is the scalpel? I'm here on workfare."
Tags:
hospital, hospitals, doctor, doctors, patient, patients, health, health care, healthcare, operation, operations, operating, o.r., o.r.s, or, ors, operating room, operating rooms, operation room, operation rooms, surgery, surgeries, surgeon, surgeons, scalpel, scalpels, social security, welfare, social safety net, workfare, employment, unemployment, incompetent, incompetents, incompetence, dangerous, risky, questionable, suspicious, irresponsible, modern life