"First, we need to stabilize his spine!"
"She's in a conversationally induced coma."
Tags:coma, comas, dates, dating, conversation, boring conversation, boring conversations, pass out, passing out passed out, couple, couples, difficult relationship, difficult relationships, disinterest, disinterested, lose consciousness, losing consciousness, lost consciousness, cafe date, cafe dates, boring, bored boredom, para-medic, paramedic, paramedics, medic, medics, ambulance, ambulance, emergency call, emergency calls, emergency service, emergency services, unnecessary, overuse of emergency services, induced coma, induced comas
"It seems the patient wishes to exercise his right to choose his own doctor. Is there another doctor in the house?"
Tags:doctor, doctors, patient, patients, medical rights, patient rights, second opinion, second opinions, medical opinion, medical opinions, personality clash, medical emergency, medical emergencies, healthcare, paramedic, paramedics, rights, health-care, medical crisis, medical crises, difficult patient, difficult patients
"I've got a pulse!"
Tags:beach, beaches, animal, animals, whale, whales, beached, stuck, trapped, save, saving, rescue, rescuing, first aid, cpr, c.p.r., cardiopulmonary resuscitation, resuscitation, mouth-to-mouth, pulse, heartbeat, breath, breathing, emergency, emergencies, rescue worker, rescue workers, paramedic, paramedics, doctor, doctors, first aider, first aiders, blowhole, blowholes, medical, medicine
"I'd love to chat longer, but I've got to get this guy to a hospital."
Tags:hospital, hospitals, ambulance, ambulances, paramedic, paramedics, medical, medicine, doctor, doctors, patient, patients, health, health care, healthcare, emergency, emergencies, death, dying, chat, chats, chatting, chatty, gossiping, gossip, old, elderly, old people, elderly people, senior, seniors, senior citizen, senior citizens, aging, ageing, growing old, growing older, getting older, getting old, growing old, old age, wasting time, bad paramedic, bad paramedics, malpractice, medical malpractice
"My God, now what?"
Tags:emergency number, emergency numbers, emergency, emergencies, 911, 999, law enforcement, cloud formation, cloud formations, police, cop, cops, crisis, crisis, disaster, disasters, natural disaster, natural disasters, paramedic, paramedics, super hero, superhero, superheroes, super heroes, super-hero, super-heroes
"Let me through! I'm a quack."
Tags:animal, animals, talking animal, talking animals, duck, ducks, quack, quacks, medical, medicine, doctor, doctors, patient, patients, victim, victims, health, health care, healthcare, emergency, emergencies, paramedic, paramedics, fake, false, pretend, pretender, pretenders, fraud, dangerous, risky, questionable, suspicious, unqualified, word play, wordplay
"Well, at least we know she died peacefully."
Tags:yoga, yogi, yoga class, yoga classes, yoga mat, progression, progressions, meditate, meditates, meditation, meditating, relax, relaxing, relaxation, stretch, stretches, stretched, stretching, peace, peaceful, peacefully, pose, poses, yoga pose, yoga poses, dead, die, died, death, dying, emt, emergency, ambulance, paramedic, paramedics, died peacefully, headstand, handstand, head stand, hand stand, hospital, hospitals, doctor, doctors
"Do we know for sure it's a concussion and not just a Keatsian swoon?"
Tags:swoon, swoons, swooning, keats, john keats, romantic poet, romantic poets, romantic poetry, concussion, concussions, concussed, concuss, head injury, head injuries, head wound, head wounds, bad head, ambulance, ambulances, traffic accident, traffic accidents, paramedic, paramedics, first responder, first responders
"Let me through, I'm a pharmaceutical rep."
Tags:emergency, emergencies, medical, medicine, medical emergency, medical emergencies, pharmaceutical rep, pharmaceutical reps, pharmaceutical representative, pharmaceutical representatives, pharmaceutical company, pharmaceutical companies, medical professional, medical professionals, medical advice, medical care, doctor, doctors, nurse, paramedic, paramedics, first aid, health care, healthcare, unqualified, questionable, suspicious, unhelpful, modern life
"He's still clicking but there's no pulse."