Pianists Cartoons

"And now, God help us all, Rachmaninoff's Concerto in C Minor."

"I'd like to dedicate my next song to that delightful little table in the corner."

"You see, darling, he plays a Steinway, just like you."

"There's no business like show business. . ."

"Let's see him get out of this sonata."

Piano-Tuning Bar

"Accepting the applause for Mr. Fontana—Mr. Fontana's mother."

"Play it, Sam."

"I don't know much about show business, but I do know we're selling more hamburgers."

"I'm sorry, but the flight of the bumblebees has been cancelled."

"Enough medical mumbo jumbo, just give it to me straight, Doc-will I ever be able to play piano again?"

"A gentleman would offer his seat."

"This song describes the events of a lovely spring day. The sky is a cloudless blue, birds are singing, and out at the ballpark the grass is an emerald green. It's the top of the fourth, there are two out and runners on first and second. The batter hits a slow roller down the third-base line. The third baseman scoops up the ball barehanded and tries for a force play at second..."

"I've had a request. Nonetheless, here's another song."

Grand Piano

"Last night, I tried out some new stuff, but tonight I'm only drinking the classics."

"Well, that's the only song we know, so we can play it another two or three times, or we can cut our losses. Waddya say, Cleveland?"

"What's remarkable is that just last week he was lying despondent on the beach."

"Trust me, Brad, those comedy sound effects aren't a reflection of how this is going."

Piano Airbag

"Lemme tell you how I feel about high blood pressure, Mr. McGuinn."

"Vivian ends every set with 'Que Será, Será.' "

"Here's another one about Teddy bears."

"I see the radiator's Baroque again."

"Come on, you know the words! Bum bum bum bum!"