"...and keep me a normal, healthy, American girl."
"All right. O.K. I'll admit that last request may have been a little over the top."
Tags:prayer, pray, praying, prayers, kneel, kneeling, god, gods, god in heaven, heaven, request, requesting, prayed, prays, religion, religious, religiously, religions, demanding, demand, demands, demanded, high maintenance, fickle, lightning, lightening, thunderbolt, thunderbolts, lightning bolt, lightning bolts, worship, worships
"And may we continue to be worthy of consuming a disproportionate share of this planet's resources."
Tags:consumer, consumers, consumption, carrying capacity, resources, resource, earth, save the planet, saving the planet, greed, greedy, planet's resource, american, americans, environmentalist, environmentalists, selfish, selfishness, worthy, unworthy, pray, prays, praying, prayer, prayers, hope, hopes, over-consume, over-consuming, overconsume, overconsuming, overuse, overusing, guilt, guilty, guilt-inducing
"Catherine would like to share some holiday thoughts with us on the subject of gender-neutral toys."
Tags:gender neutral, holiday, holidays, christmas, christmas season, holiday season, dinner, dinners, politically correct, political correctness, speech, speeches, liberal, liberals, address, addresses, addressing, christmas dinner, christmas dinners, xmas, x-mas, pc, pc culture, politically correct culture, pray, prays, praying, prayer, prayers, modern life, modern times
"Actually, it's pronounced 'An-hel'."
"That was fast."
Tags:response, responses, response team, response teams, angel, angels, pray, prayers, prayer, answer, answers, answering, heavenly, god, instant, instantaneous, instant response, instant responses, quick, quick response, quick responses, hurry, hurries, hurrying, christian, christians, christianity, theist, theists, believer, believers, faithful, almighty, god, holy spirit
"I'm old enough to recognize a lecture disguised as grace."
Tags:lecture, lectures, grace, say grace, saying grace, family dinner, family dinners, scold, scolds, scolding, passive aggressive, passive aggressiveness, passive aggression, dinner, dinners, dinner table, dinner tables, parent, parents, parenting, kid, kids, child, discipline, disciplines, disciplines, pray, prays, praying, prayer, prayers, smart alec, smart aleck, smart alecks, smartass, smartasses
"I don't know if a nap is part of God's plan for me."
"First time, long time."
Tags:first time caller, first time callers, long time listener, long time listeners, radio, radio show, radio shows, call-in, call-in show, call-in shows, calls in, calling in, talk show, talk shows, cliche, cliches, pray, prays, praying, prayer, prayers, fan, fans, chat show, chat shows, god, turn to god, turning to god, hard times, tough times, difficult times, christian, christians, christianity, believer, believers, no atheists in foxholes, butter up, butters up, buttering up
"Anyway, we'd love to have You on board for the Creighton deal."
Tags:prayer, prayers, praying, pray, prays, prayed, divine intervention, divine interventions, higher power, higher powers, god, gods, deity, deities, business deal, business deals, corporate culture, corporate deal, corporate deals, business takeover, corporate takeover, merger, mergers, businessmen, businessman
That New-Time Religion
"How's my praying?"
"Lourdes: The Cosmetic Surgery Chapel"
"Peace on Earth, good will toward crows."
Tags:selfish, self-interest, self-interested, prayer, prayers, pray, prays, praying, peace on earth, world peace, nature, animal, animals, selfishness, bug, bugs, turtle, turtles, chipmunk, chipmunks, frog, frogs, crow, crows, god, ego, egotist, egotists, egotistical, species, preference, preferences, self-involved
"Put in something about the stock market."
Tags:grace, saying grace, prayer, prayers, praying, stock market, the stock market, stocks and shares, stock market crash, the stack market crash, economic crash, financial crash, recession, the recession, investor, investors, investing, investments, investments, share owner, share owners, rich person, rich people, the one percent, the 1 percent, wealth divide, wealth gap, priorities, bad priorities, wrong priorities, personal welath
"We've always admired those literate prayers of yours, and it's our hope that you'll keep them coming even though you're dead."
Tags:religion, religious, death, after death, afterlife, heaven, heaven's gate, entrance to heaven, st. peter's gate, saint peter's gate, pearly gates, st. peter, saint peter, angel, angels, god, pray, prayer, prayers, praying, admiration, admire, literate, hope, keep up the good work, encouraging, writer, writers, author, authors
"A lot of them I only pretend to watch over."
Tags:religion, religious, heaven, god, angel, angels, watch over, watching over, guard, guarding, protect, protecting, christianity, christian, christians, pretend, pretending, make-believe, human, humans, prayer, prayers, pray, praying, impossible, overworked, limited time, confession, confessions, confessing, admission, admissions, admitting
"Help this poor wretch, Lord."
Tags:wretch, wretches, pray, prays, praying, prayer, prayers, tin cup, beg, begs, begging, beggar, beggars, panhandle, panhandles, panhandling, panhandler, my brother's keeper, brother's keeper, brothers keeper, help, helps, helping, helper, helpers, less fortunate, unfortunate, rich, riches, class divide, class division, class divisions, wealthy, 1%
"For the profits of which we are about to partake, we give thanks. Amen."
Tags:religion, religious, pray, prayer, prayers, praying, business, businessman, businessmen, boss, bosses, executive, executives, exec, execs, manager, managers, management, office, offices, office life, employee, employees, worker, workers, investor, investors, stock broker, stock brokers, board meeting, board meetings, chairman, chairmen, board, boards, meeting, meetings, profit, profits, money, finances, economy, stock market, investment, investments, thankful, grateful
"...and help my parents to pick the right mutual funds in my portfolio for my education..."
Tags:kid, kids, child, children, parent, parents, parenting, parenthood, mom, moms, mum, mums, mother, mothers, motherhood, father, fathers, fatherhood, dad, dads, family, families, praying, prayer, prayers, education, higher education, college, university, college fund, university fund, fee, fees, tuition, tuition fees, savings, saving money, education fund, money, investing, investment, investments, investor, investors, mutual funds, portfolio, portfolios, finances
"Under the Freedom of Information Act, I'm requesting that you disclose what you have on me in your files."
Tags:foia, foia request, foia requests, request, requests, pray, prays, praying, prayer, prayers, freedom of information, freedom of information act, freedom of information acts, disclose, discloses, disclosing, disclosure, personal information, personal info, info, information, god, almighty, judge, judges, judgment, judgments, judgement, judgements, insecure, insecurity, insecurities, ethics, government, governments, law, laws, lawyer, lawyers
'Will He know what this is regarding?'
Tags:receptionist, receptionists, pa, pas, gatekeeper, gatekeepers, secretary, secretaries, offices, business meeting, business meetings, god, gods, heaven, pray, praying, prayer, prayers, disrespectful, irreverent, irreverence, hierarchy, hierarchies, office hierarchy, office hierarchies, business man, business men, business person, business people, businessman, businessmen, businessperson
"And may you also bless the bounty we are about to receive from that convenience store over there."
Tags:crime, criminal, criminals, robbery, robberies, robber, robbers, thief, thieves, stick-up, stick up, hold-up, hold-ups, stickup, stickups, holdup, holdups, convenience store, convenience stores, religion, religious, pray, prayer, prayers, praying, bless, blessings, sins, sinning, bounty, money, loot, gang, gangs, urban, urban life, urban living, city, cities, city life, living in the city, city living, modern life, found god, found religion
"Perhaps if you gave me one big lump sum of cash, I wouldn't have to keep asking for small amounts all the time."
"Lord, if my prayers are pleasing to Thee, please confirm by fax."