Pretentious Cartoons

"It's the old story. East Hampton isn't big enough for both of them."

At the Met

"I just don't think a giant flaming blob of alien ectoplasm would say that."

"I design retinal-controlled destination-mapping interfaces for self-driving transportation, but not in the traditional sense."

"It'll never work—you're a moviegoer and I'm a film buff."

"What immortal hand or eye could frame thy fearful symmetry?"

"I've had those books for years. They represent the person I once aspired to be."

"Live Music The Doesn't Make You Want to Kill Yourself."

"The presentation is dreadful."

"Yes, I'm sure it looked cute and clean, but I would sooner starve to death than eat lunch in a place called Jennifer's Biscuit."

"That's not a portrait—it's actually Leonard."

"No, I've never been to the Hamptons, but I have been in hellish traffic."

"I like that-'compassionate predators.' "

"Why buy and Idaho spud when you can have a potato of distinction that grows only in the soil of northern France?"

Cook Food- The Original Theme Restaurant

"We decided to hang on to the old black-and-white set for watching colorized films."

"It's National Poetry Month, Marion, and by God we're gonna read some poetry."

"We were two ships that passed in the night for a couple of nights in a row."

"I eat here all the time so I can be a regular."

"Duh!"

"Could I have the fires al dente?"

"It's a game of power, speed, agility, and grace, but, most of all, Tom, it's a game of points."

"Sure, they drank it - but did they get it?"

"I'd like the novel they paid 3.2 million dollars for, whatever the hell it is."

"I'm certain I speak for the entire legal profession when I say that the fee is reasonable and just."