"What a couple of clucks we are. Here's another mistake right up here."
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jail, jails, prison, prisons, incarceration, behind bars, imprisoned, imprisonment, penitentiary, penitentiaries, correctional facility, correctional facilities, prisoner, prisoners, inmate, inmates, convict, convicts, criminal, criminals, crime, punishments, jail cell, jail cells, prison cell, prison cells, cell, cells, cellmate, cellmates, celly, cellie, cellies, tally, tallies, tally mark, tally marks, counting, counting the days, mistake, mistakes, error, errors, dumb, stupidA mother visits a lab rat.
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lab rat, lab rats, laboratory rat, laboratory rats, prison, prisons, prisoner, prisoners, cage, cages, rat cage, rat cages, experiment, experiments, cruel, cruelty, cruelties, animal rights, animal rights activist, animal rights activists, animal rights activism, visit, visits, visitor, visitors, visiting hours, visitation hours, inmate, inmates, cell, cells, prison cell, prison cells"This is the worst witness-protection program I've ever been in."
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prison, prisons, prisoner, prisoners, prison cell, prison cells, locked up, jail, jails, witness protection, witness protection scheme, witness protection schemes, in hiding, hide, hiding, disguise, disguises, costume, costumes, bad disguise, bad disguises, witness-protection, witness relocation, witness relocation, defendant, defendants, justice system, the justice system"They're going to make it tough for you around here when they find out you used to be a cop."
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prison, prisoners, prisoner, cops, cop, ex cop, ex policeman, prison cell, police, policeman, crime, criminal, criminals, crimes, jail, jails, incarceration, incarcerated, sentence, sentencing, cellmates, inmate, inmates, law breaker, law breakers, law breaking, law and order, police officer, police officers, law enforcement, law enforcement officers, law enforcement officer, jailbird, jailbirds, tough, rough, hard, difficult, secret, secrets, secretive, giveaway, giveaways"When I can't sleep, I find that it sometimes helps to get up and jot down my anxieties."
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sleep, sleeping, bad sleep, sleeping badly, no sleep, insomnia, insomniac, insomniacs, anxiety, anxieties, fear, fears, worry, worries, worrier, worriers, stress, stressing, stresses, stressed out, distress, distressed, distressing, cell, cells, prison cell, prison cells, graffiti, writing on the wall, mad, madness, crazy, craziness, mental health, mental health issues, mental health disorders, mental health problems, modern life, modern times, modern attitudes"Can I get that to go?"
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jail, jails, jailed, jail cell, jail cells, prison, prisons, prisoner, prisoners, prison cell, prison cells, imprison, imprisoned, criminal, criminals, crime, inmate, inmates, incarcerated, incarcerate, incarceration, behind bars, penitentiary, penitentiaries, correctional facility, correctional facilities, brig, brigs, jailer, jailers, prison guard, prison guards, guard, guards, warden, wardens, prison warden, prison wardens, take-out, take out, take-out order, take out order, ordering take-out, ordering take out, trick question, trick questions"And, what's more, the jury was packed with ungulates."
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ungulate, ungulates, hoof, hooves, hoofed, hooved, cloven hoof, cloven hoofs, goat, goats, impala, impalas, horse, horses, zebra, zebras, bias, biased jury, biased juries, convict, convicts, conviction, jury of your peers, biologist, biologists, biology, predator, predators, prey, prey animal, prey animals, tiger, tigers, lion, lions, big cat, big cats, jail cell, jail cells, prison cell, prisoner, prisoners, excuse, excuses, correctional facilities"Help! I'm being held prisioner!"
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jail, jails, prison, prisons, incarceration, behind bars, imprisoned, imprisonment, penitentiary, penitentiaries, correctional facility, correctional facilities, prisoner, prisoners, inmate, inmates, convict, convicts, criminal, criminals, crime, punishments, jail cell, jail cells, prison cell, prison cells, cell, cells, trapped, stuck, escape, help, calling for help, rescue, escape attempt, escape attemptsMinimum-Security Prison
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jail, jails, prison, prisons, incarceration, behind bars, imprisoned, penitentiary, penitentiaries, correctional facility, correctional facilities, prisoner, prisoners, inmate, inmates, convict, convicts, criminal, criminals, crime, punishments, jail cell, jail cells, prison cell, prison cells, cell, cells, minimum security, minimum-security, door, doors, bar, bars, security, easy to escape"After the judicial system, I'm my own harshest critic."
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jail, jails, prison, prisons, incarceration, behind bars, imprisoned, prisoner, prisoners, inmate, inmates, convict, convicts, criminal, criminals, crime, punishments, jail cell, jail cells, prison cell, prison cells, cell, cells, cellmate, cellmates, celly, cellie, cellies, legal system, justice system, judicial system, harshest critic, harshest critics, self-criticism, critic, critics, critical, criticism, criticising, criticizing, failure, failures, ego, insecure, insecurity, insecurities, self-esteem, self-confidence, ego, moral relativism, moral judgement, moral judgements, judgement, judgements, psychology, mental health"Save it for the parole board."
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jail, jails, prison, prisons, incarceration, behind bars, imprisoned, imprisonment, penitentiary, penitentiaries, correctional facility, correctional facilities, prisoner, prisoners, inmate, inmates, convict, convicts, criminal, criminals, crime, punishments, jail cell, jail cells, prison cell, prison cells, cell, cells, cellmate, cellmates, celly, cellie, cellies, practice, practicing, practising, speech, speeches, preparing, parole board, parole boards, parole, save it, annoyed"I'm so sorry, I never meant for you to find out this way."
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couple, couples, husband and wife, husbands and wives, marriages, long term relationship, long term relationship, resentful, resentment, anger, angry, writing on the wall, cell, cells, prison cell, prison cells, going crazy, going mad, long-term relationships, bad relationship, bad relationships, marital fight, marital fights, domestic, domestics, domestic argument, domestic arguments, spousal dispute, spousal disputes"Can you name all nine Supreme Court justices?"
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jail, jails, prison, prisons, incarceration, behind bars, imprisoned, imprisonment, penitentiary, penitentiaries, correctional facility, correctional facilities, prisoner, prisoners, inmate, inmates, convict, convicts, criminal, criminals, crime, punishments, jail cell, jail cells, prison cell, prison cells, cell, cells, cellmate, cellmates, celly, cellie, cellies, government, governments, politics, judge, judges, justice, justices, supreme court, scotus, s.c.o.t.u.s., supreme court of the united states, name, names, naming, passing time"You can't blame everything on being home-schooled by bank robbers."
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mob, mobs, mobster, mobsters, mob boss, mob bosses, mafia, mafia boss, mafioso, organised, organized, organised crime, organized crime, crime, criminal, criminals, robbed, rob, robbery, robbers, daylight robbery, armed robbery, armed robber, burglar, burglary, gun, guns, gunman, gunmen, stick em up, stick 'em up, heist, heists, bank robbery, bank, bank robber, bank robbers, jail, jailed, prison, prisoner, prison cell, cell, prison, blame, blames, blaming"You missed our anniversary again."
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jail, jails, prison, prisons, incarceration, behind bars, imprisoned, imprisonment, penitentiary, penitentiaries, correctional facility, correctional facilities, dungeon, dungeons, prisoner, prisoners, inmate, inmates, convict, convicts, criminal, criminals, crime, punishments, jail cell, jail cells, prison cell, prison cells, cell, cells, cellmate, cellmates, celly, cellie, cellies, relationship, relationships, love, marriage, marriages, married life, couple, couples, husband, husbands, wife, wives, spouse, spouses, friend, friends, friendversary, friendversaries, anniversary, anniversaries, missed, forgot, valentines, valentine's day, romantic, time, calendar, calendars, counting the days"It's a sort of Birdman of Alcatraz situation, except that Martin here isn't a bird."
"The worst part is the horizontal stripes."
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prison, prisons, prisoners, prisoner, prison cell, prisons cells, locked up, prison jumpsuit, prison jumpsuits, prison uniform, prison uniforms, jumpsuit, jumpsuits, horizontal stripe, horizontal stripes, fashions, trend, trends, following trends, vertical stripes, slim, slimming, overweight, obese, obesity, losing weight, jail, jails, in jails, jail cell, jail cells, vain, vanity, priorities, priority, wrong priorities, bad priorities"DNA proves I was unjustly convicted. However, I'm guilty of seven other crimes."
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crime, crimes, criminal, criminals, prison, prisons, prisoner, prisoners, locked up, cell, cells, prison cell, prison cells, jail, jails, jail cell, jail cells, convict, convicts, dna, evidence, criminal evidence, guilty, wrongly convicted, acquittal, acquittals, dna, new evidence, geneticsAdd Your Own Caption Week #218
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prison, prisons, jail, jails, in jail, in prison, locked up, behind bars, prisoner, prisoners, criminal, criminals, prison cell, prison cells, prison life, bath, baths, bathtub, bathtubs, bubble bath, bubble baths, water bill, water bills, the water bill, bunk bed, bunk beds, bunk, bunks, prison bunk, prison bunks"My third felony was a smart move. Folks on the outside are still waiting for health care."
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jail, jails, prison, prisons, incarceration, behind bars, imprisoned, prisoner, prisoners, inmate, inmates, convict, convicts, criminal, criminals, crime, punishments, jail cell, jail cells, prison cell, prison cells, cell, cells, cellmate, cellmates, celly, cellie, cellies, law, felony, felonies, conviction, convictions, welfare, social system, social security, medical, medicine, free healthcare, free health care, health insurance, universal healthcare, universal health care, socialised medicine, socialized medicine, socialised healthcare, socialised health care, socialized healthcare, socialized health care, bill, bills, money, medical bill, medical bills, medical costs, cost, costs, expenses, expensive, medical billing, unfair, smart move, wait times, waiting times"Why am I always the bad guy?"
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bad guy, bad guys, roommate, roommates, disagreement, disagreements, disagreeing, quarrel, quarrels, quarreling, bicker, bickers, bickering, quarrelling, fight, fights, fighting, argument, arguments, antagonize, antagonizes, antagonizing, antagonise, antagonises, antagonising, antagonist, blame, blames, blaming, put-upon, inmate, prison cell, prison cells, trapped, close quarters, flatmate, flatmates, flat, flats, apartment, apartments, arpartment life"I just think men find female homicidal maniacs very threatening."
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feminist, feminists, feminism, homicide, homicides, homicidal, maniac, maniacs, killer, killers, killing, murderer, murderers, jail cell, jail cells, prison cell, prison cells, threaten, threatening, easily threatened, masculinity, toxic masculinity, threatened, threatens, committed, cell, cells, discriminate, discriminates, discriminating, discrimination, glass ceiling, glass ceilings"There might have been some carelessness on my part, but it was mostly just good police work."
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prison, prisons, prisoner, prisoners, jail, jails, crime, crimes, criminal, criminals, cell, cells, prison cell, prison cells, jail cell, jail cells, police work, convict, convicts, conviction, careless, carelessness, cellmate, cellmates, breaking the law, gaol, gaols, detective, detectives, policemen, policeman, detective work