"Your mother and I love you, Nick, but we'll soon be turning you over to mainland China."
Tags:family, families, parent, parents, children, child, responsible, responsibility, responsibilities, hong kong, hk, colony, colonies, england, english, uk, united kingdom, gb, great britain, britain, china, chinese, one china two systems, dinner, family dinner, dinners, regional, 1997, sovereignty, hypocritical, hypocrite
"Can I borrow those kittens for an hour? I want to freak out the people who had me spayed."
Tags:cats, freak out, kittens, spayed, pets, spayed, neutered, fixed, cat, pet, prank, pranks, pranking, kitten, offspring, baby, babies, freaks out, freaking out, cat owner, cat owners, cat lover, cat lovers, responsible, responsibility, frighten, frightens, frightening, family planning, birth control
"Let's go back to the scenario in which none of this is my fault."
Tags:hypothetical, hypothetical scenario, hypothetical scenarios, blame, blames, blaming, scapegoat, scapegoats, scapegoating, blame game, responsible, responsibility, avoid responsibility, avoiding responsibility, fault, faults, at fault, meeting, meetings, irresponsible, irresponsibility, hypothetical, hypotheticals
"As a mitigating circumstance, may I say that my client's getaway car was a hybrid."
Tags:mitigating circumstance, mitigating circumstances, getaway car, getaway cars, environmental responsibility, environmentally responsible, responsible, getaway, getaways, hybrid, hybrids, hybrid car, hybrid cars, car, car, plea bargain, plea bargains, defense attorney, defense attorneys, attorney, attorneys, lawyer, lawyers, trial, trials
"I have the whole universe to look after, so I'm putting you in charge of this planet."
Tags:heaven, god, in charge, earth, stupid, whole universe, sons, idiots, planets, incompetents, incompetent, planet, universes, delegate, delegates, son, caretaker, caretakers, responsible, responsibility, irresponsible, son, house sit, house sits, house sitter, house sitters, earth, planet earth, dominion, nepotism
Where The Ecologically Correct Meets The Pathologically Frugal
"Acting responsibly is below my pay grade."
Tags:business, businesses, businessman, businessmen, businessperson, businesspeople, businesswoman, businesswomen, responsibility, responsible, corporate responsibility, corporate culture, corporate cultures, banker, bankers, banks, banked, pay, income, earning, earnings, incomes, money, irresponsible, arrogant, wasteful, wastes, too big to fail, bailout
"I think globally, but I spend locally."
Tags:cliche, cliches, expression, expressions, think globally, act locally, local business, local businesses, drinking, drinker, drinkers, barfly, barflies, bar, bars, bartender, bartenders, bartending, slogan, slogans, responsible, responsibility, stimulus, economic stimulus, small business, small businesses, small business owner, small business owners
"But, remember, you're responsible for your own happiness."
Tags:clown, clowns, happy, happiness, psychology, philosophy, philosopher, philosophers, kid, kids, child, children, balloon, balloons, responsible, responsibility, self-reliant, independent, independence, self-esteem, self-confidence, mental health, word play, wordplay, growing up, advice, words of wisdom, wise words
"You can't blame everything on the bossa nova."
Tags:lazy, laziness, slump, mess, messy, untidy, untidiness, blame, blames, blaming, responsibility, responsible, responsibilities, bossa nova, drunk, drink, drinking, alcohol, alcoholic, despair, despairing, wives, wife, spouse, spouses, husband, husbands, couple, couples, relationship, relationships, marriage, marriages, blame it on the bossa nova
"Several groups have claimed responsibility."
Tags:volcano, volcanoes, terrorist attack, terrorist attacks, eruption, eruptions, angry gods, appeasing the gods, god, gods, act of god, acts of god, claim responsibility, claiming responsibility, responsible, responsibility, terrorist group, terrorist groups, explosion, explosions, implausible, lie, lies, lying
"I'm not sure about children, but I've always wanted progeny."
Tags:children, child, kid, kids, have kids, have children, progeny, offspring, family, families, brood, family planning, responsibilities, responsible, raising, raised, raise, bring up, descendant, descendants, genetic, genetics, date, dating, relationship, relationships, plan, planning, best of both worlds
"Have you got something that will make me feel a little less guilty?"
Tags:fish, food, fishmonger, fishmongers, fish shop, fish shops, fish store, fish stores, guilt, guilty, ethics, ethical, fish farm, fish farms, fish farming, fishing, sustainable fishing, sustainable, fishery, fisheries, conservation, environmentally-friendly, environmentally friendly, green, good choices, responsible, eating
"I'm afraid I have to recuse myself, ladies. I don't want to be responsible for the Trojan War."
Tags:judgment of paris, judgement of paris, aphrodite, trojan war, responsible, responsibility, culpable, culpability, pass, passes, hard pass, hard passes, recuse, recuses, recusing, recuse yourself, recusing yourself, greek, greeks, greek myth, greek myths, greek mythology, homer, judge, judges, judging, trial, trials
"You're heading up our flagship company, Beavis, and, should anything happen, you'll be expected to go down with it."
Tags:office, offices, business, businesses, businessman, businessmen, executive, executives, business trip, business trips, headquarters, main office, head office, flagship, sinking ship, employer, employers, employee, employees, company, companies, responsible, responsibility, pressure, pressure is on, metaphor, metaphors
'Your Caption Here'
Tags:parent, parents, parenting, parenthood, child, kid, kids, daughter, daughter, atlas, mythology, greek mythology, weight of the world, weight of the world on you shoulders, globe, business man, brusiness men, businessman, businessmen, businessperson, business person, business people, businesspeople, responsible, responsibility, arriving home, back from work, porch, porches, front porch, front porches, father, fathers, dad, dads, globes, globe, giant globe, legendary atlas, titans, bringing work home, workaholic, workaholism
Talbot & Felcher - Attorneys-at-Law, formerly Jimmy & Slats - Folksingers
Tags:folksinger, folksingers, folksinging, folk, folk artist, folk artists, career, careers, career path, career paths, change career, changing careers, hippy, hippie, hippies, middle age, middle-aged, responsible, responsibility, boomer, boomers, baby boomer, baby boomers, grow up, growing up, attorney, attorneys, lawyer, lawyers, private practice, private practices, adulthood, musician, musicians, former musician, former musicians
"Of course, not everybody can face this kind of responsibility."
Tags:wines, wine, expensive wine, expensive wines, vintage wine, vintage wines, reverse psychology, persuade, persuasion, persuading, salesman, sales man, salesmen, sales men, salesperson, sales person, sales people, salespeople, responsible, responsibility, sales technique, sales techniques, pretentious, pretension, pretentiousness
Dog Day Afternoon
Tags:dog, dogs, new dog, new dogs, pet, pets, new pet, new pets, misbehave, misbehaves, misbehaving, misbehavior, misbehaviour, second thought, second thoughts, doubt, doubts, creeping doubts, responsible, responsibility, doggo, doggos, man's best friend, mans best friend, wild, out of control, hyper, hyperactive, hyperactivity
Tags:superego, superegos, comic book, comic books, superhero, superheroes, super-hero, super-heroes, guilt, guilts, guilty, guilted, passive aggressive, passive aggression, responsible, responsibility, weight of the world, atlas, right thing, right thing to do, right things to do, angst, angsty, angstiness, worry, worries, worrier, worriers
"Surely you can't hold me responsible for what others might say."
Tags:puppet, puppets, puppeteer, puppeteers, ventriloquist, ventriloquists, ventriloquists dummy, ventriloquist's dummy, ventriloquism, responsible, responsibility, blame, pass the blame, pass the buck, passing the puck, culpable, culpability, manger, managers, management style, management style, scapegoat, scapegoats, scapegoating
"Yes, I was asleep. But it was a vigilant sleep."
Tags:kid, kids, parent, parents, parental, parenting, parenthood, dad, dads, father, fathers, fatherhood, lazy, laziness, couch potato, child, sleep, sleeping, nap, napping, naps, napped, look after, babysitting, babysitter, babysitters, watch the kids, watching the kids, parenting styles, style, styles, styles of parenting, excuse, excuses, responsible, responsibility, husband, husbands, families, family, mom, mum, moms, mums, mother, mothers, motherhood, new dad, new father, new parent, new parents
"Remember when people had only themselves to blame."
Tags:rich people, rich person, the one percent, the 1 percent, wealth, wealthy, privileges, privilege, privileged, male pale stale, white trash, wealth gap, wealth divide, poverty gap, upbringing, upbringings, up-bringing, bad upbringing, bad upbringings, culpable, culpability, responsible, responsibility, blame, pass the blame, passing the blame, pass the buck, passing the buck, excuse, excuses, making excuses
The Backs Of Adult Cereal Boxes
Tags:adult life, adult world, adulthood, boring, modern, modern life, modern world, sales, ad, ads, advert, adverts, advertise, advertises, advertising, advertisement, advertisements, cereal, cereals, cereal box, boxes, back, food, breakfast, breakfast food, accountant, accountants, accounting, heart rate, heart health, ageing, age, aged, insurance, life-insurance, life insurance, responsibility, responsibilities, responsible, responsible adult, adulting, need an adult, subvert, subverted, subversion
"I had a nightmare that you and Dad woke up one day on the wrong side of history."
Tags:kid, kids, son, child, children, parent, parents, parenting, problem child, precocious, bedtime, bed, night, night time, bad dream, bad dreams, nightmare, nightmares, night terror, night terrors, wrong side of history, slogan, slogans, scare, scared, fear, fearmongering, scaremongering, media, kids say the darndest things, media, coverage, politics, political, generation difference, responsibility, responsible, take action, actions, action, consequence, consequences, future, investing in the future, plan, planning, planning ahead, history, history books, historical