"The little pig with the portfolio of straw and the little pig with the portfolio of sticks were swallowed up, but the little pig with the portfolio of bricks withstood the dip in the market."
Tags:three little pigs, children's story, children's stories, portfolio, portfolios, stock market, stocks, diversified, market dip, market dips, recession, recessions, childrens story, childrens stories, savings, savings account, savings accounts, bonds, stocks and bonds, retirement savings, fable, fables
"What should you do? Here's what you should do: invent a time machine, go back sixteen months, and convert everything to cash."
Tags:economic crash, economic crashes, market crash, market crashes, time machine, time machines, financial advisor, financial advice, financial adviser, money manager, money managers, broker, brokers, stockbroker, stockbrokers, bond, bonds, savings, savings account, 401k, 401ks, 401(k), pension, pensions, bear market, bear markets, great recession, recession, recessions
"I rolled my pension over and over and over, and now I have no idea where the hell it is."
The Bull, the Bear, the Ant, and the Grasshopper
Tags:stock market, the bull, the bear, the ant, and the grasshopper, fables, money, savings, fun, business, economy, fable, investment advice, advice, financial advisor, aesop, aesop's fables, stock, stocks, stocks and bonds, investor, investors, instant gratification, savings, save up, saves up, saving up
Unusual Retirement Plans
Tags:pension, pensions, pensioner, pensioners, 401k, 401ks, 401(k), retirement savings, retirement savings account, retirement savings accounts, financial advisor, financial advisors, financial adviser, financial advisers, financial planner, financial planners, investment, investments, investing, investor, investors, savings, savings account, savings account, irresponsible
"More Château de Costco?"
Tags:wine, wines, costco, bulk, bulk size, buy in bulk, buying in bulk, wholesale, wholesale price, wholesale prices, wine snob, wine snobs, fine wine, fine wines, boxed wine, boxed wines, box wine, box wines, save, saves, savings, spendthrift, thrifty, cheap, cheapskate, cheapskates, purchase, purchases, club store, club stores
"Your money was working for you, but it suddenly quit and now it's working for me!"
"I've consolidated all our bills into one missed payment."
Tags:consolidate, consolidates, consolidating, consolidation, bill, bills, unpaid bill, unpaid bills, missed payment, missed payments, late payment, late payments, final warning, final warnings, debt, debts, personal finances, personal finance, irresponsible, savings, savings account, savings accounts, innovate, innovates, innovation, innovator, innovators, slacker, slacker, slacking, slack off
"Fortunately, you have the life savings of a man three times your age."
Tags:ill, illness, sick, sickness, in hospital, hospital, hospitals, doctor, doctors, saving, savings, life saving, life saving, wealth, wealthy rich, insurance, medical insurance, insurance policy, insurance policies, unwell, treatment, treatments, cost of treatment, the cots of treatment, unaffordable, expensive, no medical insurance, investment, investments, costly, patient, patients, captive market, capitalism, capitalist, capitalists
"We come to you with unbelievable savings."
Tags:savings, alien, aliens, watch, watches, sales, salesperson, salespeople, offer, offers, door-to-door, ufo, ufos, flying saucer, flying saucers, discount, discounts, discounted, travelling salesman, travelling salesmen, traveling salesman, traveling salesmen, salesperson, salespeople, advertisement, advertisements, advertising, advert, adverts, ad, ads
"I want to be saved, but at the same time I want to be spent."
Tags:saving, savings, spending, spendings, expenditure, spending money, women talking about men, relationship, relationships, ideal relationship, ideal relationships, confused, conflicted, in two minds, indecision, indecisive, consumer, consumers, consumerism, managing money, rescuer, rescuers, rescued
"I need something that says, 'Let's party,' but in a fiscally responsible manner."
Tags:party, parties, fiscal responsibility, fiscally responsible, conservative, careful, party animal, party animals, outfit, outfits, pantsuit, pantsuits, dress, dresses, dress-up, middle age, middle-aged, forty, fortysomething, thirtysomething, professional, professionals, shindig, shindigs, savings, save up, saves up, saving up
"Luckily, our retirement funds are entirely in double lattes."
Tags:money, cash, cash in, cashing in, coffee, coffee addict, addict, addicted, addiction, finance, finances, personal finance, financial crisis, crash, market crash, recession, recessions, modern, modern life, luxury, luxuries, necessity, necessities, retirement, retirement fund, retirement funds, 401k, pension, pensions, pension scheme, latte, lattes, city life, middle class, new middle class, economy, economics, frugal, scrimp, scrimping, saving, savings, coffee, coffee bar, coffee bars, trend, trends, barista, baristas, expensive
"I found some more acorns today."
Tags:acorn, acorns, nut, nuts, bargain, bargains, bargain hunter, bargain hunters, coupon, coupons, overstock, overstocks, overstocked, overstocking, save, saves, saving, savings, pack rat, pack rats, save up, saves up, hoarder, hoarders, hoarding, squirrel, squirrels, chipmunk, chipmunks, storage, storage space, stuff, clutter, cluttered, mess, messy
"Every day I ask myself, 'Am I embezzling enough for retirement?' "
Tags:business, businessman, businessmen, crime, white collar crime, white-collar crime, embezzlement, embezzle, embezzler, embezzlers, misappropriation, skimming, stealing, retire, retirement, savings, retirement savings, money, aging, ageing, growing old, growing older, getting older, getting old, growing old, mid life crisis, mid-life crisis, midlife crisis, bar, bars, pub, pubs, patron, patrons, customer, customers, drink, drinks, drinking, drinking alcohol, alcohol, alcoholic, finances, financial planning, financial planner, financial planners, financial plan, financial plans, saving for retirement
"The fifty-five-gallon drum is completely filled with pennies, sir. Should it be taken to the bank?"
Tags:servant, servants, butler, butlers, save, saves, savings, cheap, cheapskate, cheapskates, savings, savings account, savings accounts, save up, saves up, saving up, change, spare change, penny, pennies, rich, riches, spendthrift, rich person, rich people, take it to the bank, taking it to the bank, elite, elites, wealth, wealthy, wealth gap, wealth gaps
"...and help my parents to pick the right mutual funds in my portfolio for my education..."
Tags:kid, kids, child, children, parent, parents, parenting, parenthood, mom, moms, mum, mums, mother, mothers, motherhood, father, fathers, fatherhood, dad, dads, family, families, praying, prayer, prayers, education, higher education, college, university, college fund, university fund, fee, fees, tuition, tuition fees, savings, saving money, education fund, money, investing, investment, investments, investor, investors, mutual funds, portfolio, portfolios, finances
"Think of all that interest piling up at six per cent per annum from day of deposit."
Tags:desert island, desert islands, stranded, abandon, abandoned, maroon, marooned, castaway, castaways, bank account, bank accounts, banker, bankers, saving, savings, savings account, savings accounts, interest, earning interest, compound interest, deposit, deposits, positivity, staying positive, positive outlook, positive outlooks optimist, optimists, opptimism
"Have you ever wanted something so bad that you'd actually save up the money to buy it?"
Tags:save up, saves up, saving up, save money, saves money, saving money, spender, spenders, spending, savings, savings account, saving accounts, want, wants, desire, desires, slacker, slackers, slack off, slacks off, slacking off, wastrel, wastrels, loser, losers, broke, spend money, spends money, spending money
"I'll be okay when I retire. I'm maxing out my 401(K), stepping up my IRA contributions, and three times a year I bury two duffle bags filled with unmarked bills in my backyard."
Tags:saving, savings, retirement plan, retirement plans, retirement fund, retirement funds, retirement planning, unmarked bill, unmarked bills, ira contribution, ira contributions, 401k, 401(k), retirement, retirements, saving, savings, savings account, savings accounts, financial advice, financial adviser, financial advisers, financial advisor, financial advisors
Tags:chip and pin, chip and pins, chip and pin machine, chip and pin machines, cashpoint, cashpoints, cash point, cash points, insult, insulting, rude, rudness, say it how it is, saying it how it is, poor, penniless, broke, in debt, debtor, debtors, bankrupt, bankruptcy, saving, savings, saver, savers, no savings, credit, credit cards, avaliable credit, atm, atms, bank, banks, automated teller machine, automated teller machines, cash machine, cash machines, recession, the recession, recessions, double di recession, banker, bankers, yo mammas gumbo, yo' mamma's gumbo
"We merged to save through volume buying."
"Look! I'm going to be a customer!"
Tags:marriage, married, propose, proposal, engage, engaged, ring, rings, engagement, proposed, proposals, consumer, consumerism, clerk, clerks, assistant, assistants, saving, savings, class, class, lower class, service, service industry, customer, customer divide, love, loving, romance, romantic, romantically, marry, marrying, bride, brides, bridal, dress, dresses, wedding, wedding dress, wedding dresses, modern life, modern, modern world
"You wouldn't think there'd be much money in potatoes, chickens, and wood chopping, but it all adds up."
Tags:peasant, peasants, serf, serfs, serfdom, rural, rurals, sticks, medieval, mediveval times, historical, history, histories, account, accounts, accounting, accountants, accountant, chore, chores, class, money, save, saving, savings, farm, farming, farmer, farmers, honest, honest wage, honest wages, living in the past, clash, clashes, culture, cultural clash
"There's a less crowded and more attractive beach at the newly renovated, moderately priced Hotel del Mar, in nearby . . ."